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dopeguru's avatar

Do you think insane people can be loved?

Asked by dopeguru (1928points) March 5th, 2015

I consider myself insane. I only like pain in relationships so I push lover candidates away. I create conflict and and trouble/hurt the opposite sex who is showing me too much contentment or love (not sure why I do that). This always leads me to act inconsistently like an emotional roller coaster and I eventually shortly end up being left behind.

I only do this if I really like the person I’m seeing. But it doesn’t lead anywhere because they give up. Is this behavior caused by an instinct thats telling me the relationship won’t go anywhere?

Lastly, if someone truly likes me, would they stick with me and would it work out? Perhaps these men were somewhat infatuated but not really loving who I am with all the makings and details.

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14 Answers

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Yes, “insane” people can be loved. There are all kinds of medications made to help control and alleviate some problems that are brought on by mental illness.

However, you should never self-diagnose. Issues, which most people have in varying forms, don’t necessarily equate to mental illness.

As for your questions about why you behave certain ways, no one but a therapist could help you answer those questions. We don’t know you well enough, and there are a multitude of circumstances that might have caused specific behaviors in yourself.

I suggest you talk with a therapist and bring up any concerns you have.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Only if a person is sensitive enough to pick up what is truly below all that and can see the good in you. Without knowing you I sense there is A LOT of anger and disappointment/pain. Work on it, time is passing and you may at some point need companionship as you get older. Get on with the process of helping the anger subside.

stanleybmanly's avatar

Well, from what I’ve seen, there’s ample reason to suspect love itself to be just another form of insanity. I’ve certainly bumped into enough people in relationships that a rational person could only view as insane, to conclude that there are just as many folks “victimized” by love as there are who benefit from the affliction. The libraries of the world just bulge with tomes on stingy men lavishing their fortunes on tramps, men and women tossing life long principles and beliefs aside for dastards and thieves. Brave men betraying their nations for the attentions of bimbos, while pious women sell themselves on the street to support the drug habits of neer-do-wells. Don’t be fooled by all those mushy songs, and that hype designed to pimp greeting cards, flowers and candy. Love is hell’s roulette wheel, and you’re much better off viewing it as the terrifying risk that it is!

JLeslie's avatar

Of course.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I’d say anyone can be loved – if they allow themselves to be lovable.
Have you heard of the expression drama queen? Do any of those characteristics fit?
In general, reliable, stable, nice guys avoid such a person.
On the other hand “bad boys” are usually attracted and are willing to date for a short time.
What type of partner do you want?.

Pachy's avatar

Well, apparently Oklahomans love this one. They put him in office.

dopeguru's avatar

@LuckyGuy I don’t think so. I just get this way with relationships!

cazzie's avatar

You are only going to attract what you put out there. There are enough people with their own baggage on the planet so that every puzzle piece is likely to have it’s own fit of one or two or three, but will you or they be happy? Some relationships only bring misery. Love or not.

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
David_Achilles's avatar

Is it possible that you don’t feel that you’re deserving of love? Is pushing love away your way of testing to see if someone loves you enough? Of seeing if their love is really real? That may not be insane but it is the sign of a troubled individual who needs to love themselves first in order to feel truly loved. I have known a person who was like that and it was very painful to love them. It was hard. My love was true, but they didn’t believe it was, nothing could make them believe it was, because they didn’t love themselves. Sad, very sad…

Judi's avatar

Anyone worth having won’t put up with that kind of bull shit. If they do, they have enough problems of their own.

Strauss's avatar

Anyone can be loved. It’s what one does with the love one receives that truly tells the tale.

JLeslie's avatar

What @Judi says is true.

You get what you give.

Are you testing your partner to see how much they will tolerate? Don’t do that if you are. It’s a horrible practice.

1TubeGuru's avatar

Yes, keep your insane friend close and your Ice pick closer.

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