Legit interest of mine...or just remnants of my ex?

There are some great people here, thanks for helping, my question involves whether or not a career interest is my own, or a result of my abusive ex.

I asked a few questions on this ex of mine who long story short was a helicopter rescue nurse and bragged endlessly about how cool it was, how many people she saved. I was super depressed talking to her, as my job is ‘boring’.

Anyway, I worked as a firefighter/emt for years so I ‘get’ the rescue, the feelings, the action, and before I ever met her I loved helicopters and the whole ‘rescue scene’ in general.

I moved on to a better paying job but I miss the action a lot, what didn’t help was her endlessly ‘oh, well that’s boring guess where I flew today!’. It made me deeply wonder if I was on the right path. I started considering if I should go back to school for nursing, to work in ER and eventually helicopters, or maybe join the military to fly helicopters…

These thoughts eat at me because I ‘always’ had an interest in this stuff before she came along, but after she did it took on a whole new level of obsession…any tips or thoughts? Thanks guys