Schools have to take responsibility for building a culture where bullying is unacceptable. Unfortunately, most don’t seem to want to deal with it. Maybe they don’t know how to.
It’s not so different from teaching tolerance—educating kids about racism, sexism, homophobia and all the other isms that hurt people. The bullying has to be raised in a class, and the consequences shown, and real conversations had about it. That scares off most schools. Administrators and teachers are just too wimpy to confront it, as so many stories above have shown.
My children went to a school that confronted these things head-on. It didn’t eliminate all the problems, but when there was a problem, the teachers intervened. This was a private school, so they had to do what the parents wanted or they’d lose students. It was also a small school, so news about anything flew around the school instantly.
I don’t know exactly what went on in their program. My daughter has given me bits and pieces of it. But I think mostly everyone has to be on same page—teachers, parents and administrators. They have to commit to educating the kids about bullying and to eradicating it. They have to be willing to intervene at any time.
At my children’s school, the teachers loved the kids. They cared. I think that in many schools, teaching is just a job. They don’t want to put out any more energy than they have to. It’s very sad. The stories above are heart-rending. It shouldn’t happen, and it doesn’t have to happen.