@bkcunningham The second child getting the maiden name is interesting.
@peridot Yeah, I guess I can see how a son would feel they need to be like the dad he was named after. My husband is named after his dad, and oddly he is the second born son (I actually know someone else named after their dad who is not the first born son) and he is so much more like his dad than his older brother. Especially the way my husband looks really favors his father.
In my family tradition would be to name after a dead relative. This is actually what Ashkenazi Jews do, name after a dead relative, or at minimum use the first letter of their name, so you can update to a more modern name. So the child does not really know the person they are named for. This is why you almost never find a Jewish man in American who is a Jr., or a II. Meanwhile, I was not named for anyone according to my mom, and she would know, but my middle name actually is the first letter of my mom’s grandmother, so I can say that is my name I guess.