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arcticwolf's avatar

How do I stop having second-thoughts after an act of generosity?

I often have niggling regrets after I decide to give things away to friends, or pay for friends’ meals. Even after doing a friend a favour I can’t help but mentally tally how many favours I ought to get in return!

Yesterday I baked 3 cheesecakes, and I brought one over to a close friend’s house for her to sample. I took a quarter and left her with the remaining half. When I got home I thought about how much time the cheesecake took to make, and how much the ingredients cost (it was rum-and-raisin flavoured.. Rum’s not cheap.)

I’m worried that it’s due to my upbringing… In fact I only started fretting about saving the cheesecake because I thought about how my mother might scold me for being overly generous.

How can I get over my inability to be freely giving to friends who I value!

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