Social Question

BBSDTfamily's avatar

What's with the joint Facebook accounts? Are these people all seriously insecure?

Asked by BBSDTfamily (6839points) April 10th, 2011
26 responses
“Great Question” (2points)

Whenever I see a “JackandJane” type profile on Facebook, I automatically assume that one of the two in the relationship (probably from the girl, or at least that’s the case with the ones that I’m friends with) is so insecure that they can’t allow their other half to have their own account. By insecure, I mean insecure with the relationship enough that they fear the other may be doing devious things if left to themselves on their own account. Do you all think that’s why too? Why else would anyone need to monitor all the activity like that?

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Answers

perspicacious's avatar

I’ve never seen a joint account.

yankeetooter's avatar

I have, and it’s for a couple I know who are happily married and very secure in that marriage…I don’t know why people normally do this, but in this case, I think they are just “advertising” to everyone else that they are inseparably together…that’s my best guess, at least.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

Yes, but you know what’s even worse? Creating a facebook page for your unborn child, and having conversations with them.

augustlan's avatar

I’ve never seen one like that. I can imagine that some people probably have one as a kind of ‘family’ account, like updates on the kids and family activity, and may have their own individual accounts in addition to the joint one. Aaaand, some people are probably insecure. ;)

Mikewlf337's avatar

I agree. It seems silly to me. It is like they want to show the world how “madly in love” they are. Creat you own personal accounts people. chances are you both don’t have the same friends. Chances are your marriage will more than likely end in divorce. Everything doesn’t have to be shared. It is over doing it and it is annoying.

tedibear's avatar

Another thought: Maybe they both want to be “findable” by friends and family, but one of them uses the account far more than the other. The one who doesn’t use the account much – if at all – just wants to have his/her name out there in case an old friend or long lost family member is looking for him/her. The heavier user may be the one in daily contact with friends and might be there for eight million games, too.

Seaofclouds's avatar

I know one couple that has a joint page. From my understanding, he didn’t have a FB page when they got married and didn’t really want his own, so she changed hers to a joint page for their friends and family to see what’s going on with them and keep in touch (they’ve moved a few times since being married).

Seelix's avatar

I think it’s pretty silly too.

My dad has a Facebook account and my mom doesn’t, so she’ll occasionally post something on mine from my dad’s, with a “love Mom” at the end. But I know that’s just because she’s technologically clueless and really wouldn’t know what to do with her own account. But it’s not really the same, because A) my parents are old and B) it’s in my dad’s name only.

I think it’s weird for couples to have joint accounts. I think it’s just as weird for people to set up accounts for their babies!

KatawaGrey's avatar

I don’t think it’s weird or necessarily insecure for couples to have joint facebooks. I am friends with a couple who has a joint facebook account and it’s just easier for them to have the same account. They are both heavily involved in their church and other community activities together so it just makes sense to maintain the same account because everyone can contact both of them at the same time. I think if one partner won’t let the other have a facebook, that’s a different matter entirely.

downtide's avatar

I’ve never seen a joint Facebook account but in my dealings with customer emails I’ve seen lots of shared email addresses like that.

diavolobella's avatar

I don’t automatically assume it’s a situation involving insecurity nor do I automatically assume the female is at fault. The few people I know who have joint accounts do it because they simply like participating in Facebook together or it’s easier for them to manage one account. It’s a personal choice and it’s really none of my business anyway.

If I ever saw a situation where I knew with certainty that one person was doing that out of insecurity and the other partner allowed them to, I’d think they were both equally at fault – one for being so insecure and the other for staying in a relationship where they were treated with distrust.

Jude's avatar

My girlfriend’s brother and his wife have one. I know for a fact that he has no interest in having a Facebook account, but, she does, and she put them both on one. It is a way for her to keep in contact with their mutual friends and family. They post pictures of their own family (those two and their little boy). She probably relays info from friends and family back to the hubby.

In this case, it there is no meaning behind it.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

I do think it’s different if it’s an older couple that isn’t so technofriendly and on facebook a lot, or one partner’s on facebook and is merely stating that you can reach the other partner (who isn’t on facebook) via them, than when it’s two people who know their way around a computer and are on facebook all the time (and not just about their activities as a couple) and still share one. The latter, I would think it creates unnecessary drama from opening a message intended only for one partner.

Jude's avatar

“than when it’s two people who know their way around a computer and are on facebook all the time (and not just about their activities as a couple) and still share one. The latter, I would think it creates unnecessary drama from opening a message intended only for one partner”

I agree with you there. Although, I have never seen that done.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

@Jude I have, and it was always with people who went through lots of hot-and-cold relationships really fast – they had to delete it a few months later. Course, I’m more than a bit biased in several ways when it comes to facebook, so the term “anecdotal evidence” doesn’t even begin to cover it.

Jude's avatar

@MyNewtBoobs I hear ya!

JLeslie's avatar

My old college roomate’s parents have a joint. Basically she is on all of the time, but I think they want people to know they can find her husband too, he just isn’t very active on facebook.

Porifera's avatar

I am not married, but having a joint fb page for a married couple makes total sense to me. They share the same family and friends, and they do most activities together, so why not just have one page where they post everything for family and friends to see. Why would I even question people who have a joint account? Who sets the rules? Who ever said that fb was supposed to be for individuals only? Even companies and businesses have their own page. Why not couples too? I think it’s the couple’s choice.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Why not? You can’t assume their reasons are all the same. Why do you have a fb account? Are you that insecure about your life that you must parade in front of hundreds of people who have really no interest in it, at the end of the day?

Neizvestnaya's avatar

I’ve not seen one yet but can imagine it’s an easy way for a couple to update particular family and friends as to what’s up with their family.

BarnacleBill's avatar

The one I know is a lesbian couple. They are very much “we are one” oriented in their relationship, and take pride in the fact that they are open with each other. I know a lot more people that share an e-mail address.

BBSDTfamily's avatar

I definitely also see a different side to it if it’s an older married couple. The specific couples that I am friends with that have joint accounts (therefore the ones who got me thinking of this question) are young and either newlywed or just dating.

BarnacleBill's avatar

Just dating sounds like one of the pair has control issues; newlyweds, I’d chalk up to the “we are one” camp.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

So isn’t there a psychological school of thought saying that the “we are one” camp is codependent and unhealthy? And thus any joint FB accounts proclaiming that “they are one” is then unhealthy?

BarnacleBill's avatar

@MyNewtBoobs, probably. It’s like going out in public wearing matching outfits with your spouse.

JLeslie's avatar

@BBSDTfamily It’s probably hard to generalize, even with young people. Can be they are codependent, can be that they are just sick in love goo goo ga ga for the time being, can be one is more computer oriented than the other, can be one is being very controlling, can be that they think it is cool, so many possibilities.

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