Yeah. :(

Yes. I’ve been feeling this way for a year now. Lately it’s gotten even worse. Life is a series of ups and downs so it’ll get better. Life goes on. Don’t become enamored of living with pain to the point where you shrug off moments of happiness to live in it. Life goes on.

Yes. The only advice I have is try to keep busy and surround yourself with true friends.

Yes, they day my close mate died, I think a little bit of me did too. :(

Yes. Many times, in fact. The good news is that it always gets better. You’ve just got to hang on until it does.

Yes…going through a bit of that DI myself. I have every reason not to feel this way too….it’s weird. Exercise and playing guitar helps me fight it off.

Nope. What’s it like?

Of course- because like all of us, I am in fact dying.
The only difference is I never forget it. This is not a good thing.
On good days I sometimes manage to briefly forget it. It doesn’t last.

Oh God. It sucks something fierce. Not knowing what is going to happen. Fearing the worst. Wondering how you can survive. Waiting for news. Each second feels like an hour. You can’t sleep. You can’t think. Your mind goes round and round and you can’t seem to a handle on it. Yeah. I know that feeling. All too fucking well.

I did.

All of those who said to you it will pass were lying [ half of it ]
It does not pass if you do not take actions.

First of all take good care of your grief [ it may have something to do with people who did you wrong in the past or recent .. you need to forgive them to overcome this situation ]
Then start working on something to release youjr mind a bit.

Good luck with it.

Yes, I have. It sucks.

I don’t recall ever feeling like I was dying inside. Hope I never do.

What @Hibernate said, It does not pass if you do not take actions is at the heart of it. There is a grieving process for that fact that your world abruptly changed without any or minimal input from you, and you are left having to craft change and a different life, when you were happy, or relatively happy, with the way things were. Not only has the here and now changed, but what you thought the future would be, is now different. It takes a bit to get things back on track, starting with letting go of what once was. That’s harder to do than it sounds, and keeping busy helps loosen your grip on the past, sometimes allowing it to slip from your fingers without noticing. It may leave you empty handed for a bit, but that creates an arena for possibilities.

The only thing constant is change.

@FluffyChicken Your questions are all ice cream and chocolate now aren’t they?

You must need a serious {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug))))))))))))))))))

Every time I get Modded.

Yes, so I understand you. Keep hanging on, it will get better.

Sure and it sucks because as much as I tried to distract myself with things, I kept feeling awful as if I couldn’t slow down or get any one thing done well.

I can’t eat or sleep. Every time I try to eat, I get really nauseous, and every time I try to sleep, I just get overcome with grief and sadness, and just can’t.

@FluffyChicken: Try some of these, really.

Movie marathon- even if you have to stop one and go to another. Best if you can find a mini series.

Sit down and build a playlist of songs you like (not sad ones).

Let yourself dance til exhaustion, take a bath, rub yourself all over with lotion and lay down for a nap on top of fresh linens.

Catch up on the little grooming things you put off.

Clean out/organize your closets and/or cabinets.

Wash and detail your car.

Write up grocery lists, monthly budgets, birthdays of people, gift ideas, etc.

Go to a fabric/hobby store and pick out some buttons to switch on a few clothes items.

Build yourself an online gift registry of things you’d like for your own place someday or your present one.

Look online for clothes you like, save the pictures to files such as Summer-Winter-School-Work-Fun.

To to a website that has an online “closet” where you choose an avatar and build it to your own height and measurements, even skin, eye and hair colors. It’s like playing online paperdolls with a little you.

Take some pictures of yourself dressed and groomed to your satisfaction and send them along with emailed updates, a few lines to people in your email contacts list.

@Neizvestnaya – I thought I read ‘lay down for a nap on top of fresh livers.’ On re-reading, ‘linens’ does sound more sensible, but hey, it’s put an idea in my head now!

Yes, I have. It’s horrible when you’re in the middle of that. Hope you feel a bit better soon.

Yes.

Yes. I described it as though I had lost a piece of me, like losing a limb. I had never known before that an emotional event can actually feel physically painful. I promise it gets better. Let friends and family help you, be with them, tell them you are hurt and sad.

I don’t think so but I stay on the cusp of it most of the time. ): No; that’s an exaggeration. I’m just irritated and worried and I should be if ya ask me. It can’t be too severe because I do look forward to things once in a while! Like being with my daughter on Easter. (: I need to post her pic for my avatar one of these days just to show off. lol
But if I felt like I were dying inside? Hmm probably a few Margaritas and some old movies. Or, a loooong phone call with a friend who would sympathize.

The best part of being down is that you always get back up. Sometimes it’s the natural high that hurts the most when you get depressed…

Yes, and it goes hand in hand with true heartache.

Yes. When that feeling comes up, I call a friend. I make popcorn, I watch an old film. I drag myself out of the house for a walk and go to a bookshop, get a coffee and then sit on a bench and watch people. I drive somewhere and then park and have another big hoo-hoo where no one can hear me. I take “Star of Bethlehem” Flower Remedy.

Usually a big boo-hoo cry and rant (alone where no one can hear me) works…followed by “Star of Bethlehem” to calm down. Depression is often covering repressed anger…so having a good old rant at life in the car while you are boo-hooing works like a charm.

I hope you get to feeling better @FluffyChicken…just take care of yourself…and let whatever it is that is bothering you….out in a constructive way.

Once I was on stage in front of a large audience, where our performance was being recorded, I was singing a lead, and I COMPLETELY forgot the words. I had sung it 100 times before but I totally spaced. I ended up making it into a joke song on the spot and everybody laughed, but for a split second, the floor completely dropped out from under me.

It’s called depression. It’s not expected to go away in a few days. It takes time and a lot of change before you can actually stop feeling like this. I went three days without eating and a week with about 8 hours of sleep total. I was numb to every pain that anyone can throw at me. I didn’t care about anyone and anything. Looking back, I’m glad I went through that and now I know what to expect if something like that comes up.
Even once in a while, I do feel like I’m dying inside and that’s when I go out to help me forget.

When I was very depressed and exhausted of everything.But life eventually got a little easier and I got myself out of my funk.

Feeling it now, with the white-hot lightening shooting through my entire body and my body is in ketosis because I just can’t eat.

Time for some philosophy, your mind and your mood are making an echo chamber.
If you don’t already know some sources of affirmation that life is good, shop around there are many styles of positive thinking, from Yoga Vedanta to Tony Robbins to Robert Thurman (Uma’s dad) to ‘Whistle While You Work’.

Training the mind to create what you want is good work.
Figuring out what you want is a vital side job. What’s missing for you?
Primal Therapy compels one to answer in the most fundamental ways possible:
How do you feel ? What do you want ?

@seazen_ seems insightful though and I’ll follow suit with another “serious {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug))))))))))))))))))” too.

Unfortunately, I will always feel dead inside. I lost a bit of my persona (Don’t know which) sometime ago and I finally realized just how pathetic my life is. The only thing that keeps me from killing myself is the fact that suicide doesn’t solve anything. I was diagnosed with Bipolar type 1, which is the the one which is more dangerous for the person (Type 2 is the common one with the temper tantrum then the supper happy). Even though Type 1 explains alot of the super happy then super depressed mood swings, it doesn’t explain the actual facts that have always appeared in front of me. Proving how much my life sucks is always a disheartening thing, but I find solice in the fact that atleast I’m not making it up.

@dabbler – Reading “You Can Heal Your Life” by Loiuse L. Hay. Learning all about making your life what you want it to be, clearing head of negative thoughts and putting new, positive affirmations in place.

Aren’t we all dying inside? That’s kind of what we do…

@spykenij Louise Hay is a classic, good stuff, enjoy!
Her mirror work (looking yourself in the face, in the eyes) is a surprisingly powerful exercise.

@dabbler Depending upon a person’s beliefs and psychology, that can be dangerous or in the very least problematic.

Neurospeak is a great exercise too.

@GabrielsLamb What sort of problems? I had not heard about that.

@dabbler The eyes are tricky things in relation to perception and reality, and the silver skin tends to play tricks on a mind that is already experiencing issues. It’s not always a good idea to interact with one’s psyche visually, until the entire unit is in accord and the mental health of the person is properly adjusted and safe.

Newton was said to loathe mirrors and reflective surfaces and I can’t help but wonder why exactly being that he was the man who wrote Opticks.

Mirrors have been long thought to alter reality simply because of the way the eyes work on the nerve centers of the brain by impulse, thought and reaction to thought.

That is an exercise that can be dangerous for someone who is experiencing feelings of negativity or having mental or emotional issues. It is an exercise in disaster actually.

The lore attached to them existst for a reason, the reason why the Jews cover them as they sit shiva, the reasons why witches use them to scry, the reasons why people who have BDD avoid them… They are powerful reversals of fortune or the catalysts for disaster and unless you understand the psyche and the ailment it’s not a wise thing to do.

Have you ever stared into a mirror? Your perception of self is greatly altered naturally all on its own.

@GabrielsLamb Good points, thanks. Did you have some rough experiences with mirror work?
Yes, the mirror exercises are powerful, no escaping yourself. Delusions and rationalizations fall away. So, you’re right, it’s best to do that sort of thing when you have some healthy sense of self to settle back on. Without that it’s looking into your own abyss.

@dabbler No… I know how to use them. *Smiles. I think on the other hand, many self deluded people can also use them in such a way where they reinforce the belief in their own faulty constructs. The narcissistic megalomanaic for instance will only inhance their own delusions of granduer, as well as the misinformed will merely reflect and strengthen their beliefs in their own error.

Therefore it is indeed dangerous if one doesn’t have a clear sence of right and wrong and the self that drives each.

If you are deluded and in a state of error, the mirror will not alter it, it will reinforce your self of self delusion and you will convince yourself, as a copy of yourself that you are okay when you’re not. That can happen as well.

Some people hold a lot of weight on their own reasons for belief. Funny how that little inclusion, right there in the middle of the word is so often overlooked merely out of the convienience of the necessity that ignoring it affords those who hold to them. BeLIEf’s are strange things indeed.

Yes. I have thoughts of leaving this world but I’d never do anything because I could never do that to my children. I would seriously think about it though if I didn’t have my children to worry about. I don’t know what to do to make the sadness and depression go away. It’s situational depression, but I don’t see it getting any better. I feel like I don’t have any support to make the changes I need to make to better myself.

I searched for a similar question that I thought had been asked recently but I can’t find it, so I’m letting it all out here.