In the context of someone with no other outlet that meets their need to seek understanding, support & validation, it could be one of the healthiest alternatives.
Yes, I agree that it’s certainly not the best way to get this, especially as the only such outlet. BUT, sometimes unless people get just a little bit of validation, their pain/stress is very apt to multiply and wreak havoc on their lives (whether or not it accidentally ‘explodes’). I think, considering the potential severity of such a problem, it’s worth recognizing that – done tactfully & respectfully – it may be a much better way to deal than the alternatives.
[Pain is, for better or worse, a self-focused mindstate, one that centers around the awareness of the pain. Until the pain is addressed somehow, it will be incredibly difficult for a person to set this aside – because focusing on the ‘wound’ is an instinctive attempt to ensure it’s healed promptly. Yes, we’ve all probably experienced this pain-mindstate being maladaptive or expressing itself unhealthily. Yet there’s many circumstances where another’s recognition of the fact that the pain is bad and the cause of it is worth even a moment of undivided attention – in other words, validation – does wonders to diffuse even the most difficult reactions to pain. Once another expresses their recognition of the significance of the person’s pain, the sufferer is much more capable of healing themselves out of this mindstate. I find that dismissing another’s pain, or saying something that implies that it’s their fault (among other things) tends to escalate pain reactions to the maladaptive point – which entirely counteracts the goal behind dismissing the pain, which is usually to get them out of their pain-focused mind-loop & related behavior. This is why validation can be worth a bit of time & inconvenience, even if only for the people who’d otherwise have to deal with a person stuck in this mindstate.]
Certainly, it’s up to the discretion of the community to determine what’s appropriate. But it can’t hurt to factor in the immense benefit of reasonable forms of validation when judging the acceptability of tactful self-disclosure.