Meta Question

Blondesjon's avatar

Will someone please hijack this thread?

Asked by Blondesjon (33979points) June 11th, 2011
3827 responses
“Great Question” (33points)

We all know that it happens here quite often. We also know that a lot of folks get pretty upset when it happens and that is understandable.

What I would like to do with this question is create a thread that can be hijacked at will. We can start it off by discussing hijacking in general and then, well, you know . . .

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Answers

Berserker's avatar

Not only do I hijack your thread by not talking about hijacking as thou hath inquired pon’, but I do indeed hihjacketh thy peaceful nights!

So, what creeps you guys out?

Bellatrix's avatar

Not to hijack your thread @Blondesjon but I just went shopping and bought some great shoes. I figure wearing these shoes if I was going to be involved in a hijacking, I could just kick one of them in the shins and permanently disable them. Does anyone think this round toed shoe trend is just ick? Always makes me think of Roald Dahl and The Witches. All witches wear round toed shoes.

Round toed shoes @Symbeline.

MilkyWay's avatar

GIVE ME BACK MY PANTIES!!!
NOW!!

Bellatrix's avatar

Throws the pair of granny panties I found in the corner of Queenie’s room at her.

Berserker's avatar

@Bellatrix I love that. I’ve long thought that emotions aren’t exactly what we perceive, and then define them as. It’s not so much creepy to me as it is a bit saddening, at least, until some life threatening thing happens to me. Like mutated saber tooth tigers that drive around downtown. XD Cool vid though. :)

@queenie ’‘small voice’’ ...but I like them.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I’m going to set off a box of fireworks in here that’ll light things up and make you all jump around like you’ve got squirrels in your pants.

Bellatrix's avatar

Squirrels in our pants? Do squirrels have claws? Do your worst @hawaii_jake!!

Get’s shoes ready for a squirrel squishing session.

Berserker's avatar

@hawaii_jake When I was younger some friends and I had a bunch of fireworks, those that look like birthday candles. We were lighting them and hucking them around and stuff. But on one of mine, the fuse wasted really fast and it blew up between in my fingers as I was about to throw it. It hurt like a bitch and I cried lol.

Play it safe kids! :D

MilkyWay's avatar

@hawaii_jake I haven’t got any pants!! Someone’s took them.

Berserker's avatar

…dun be lookin at me…

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

I keep reading “hijacking” as “jacking off”. Soooo…. sounds about right….

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I don’t mean to hijack the thread, but has anyone seen my Complete Works of Shakespeare? I need it to throw at some squirrels.

Bellatrix's avatar

Well, sounds like Queenie is already way ahead if we are having a jacking off party!! She lost her undies @MyNewtBoobs.

augustlan's avatar

[mod says] Let’s stick to the topic, fol… Oh, look. Shiny!

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

@Bellatrix She lost her undies to me?? Damn straight she did. I can charm the pants off a snake. But I wouldn’t want to, because I find snake creepy and disgusting and don’t like being around them, much less having sex with them.

Berserker's avatar

Whacking off and squirrels…this is creepier than my poor little video I first posted on here…love it. :D

@augustlan Baaahahahahha! Your powers are useless now! Skeletor says, gimme your wallet! :D

Bellatrix's avatar

Waves shiny buttons @augustlan… you are very, very sleepy. Watch the shiny… watch…

Bellatrix's avatar

Snakes and squirrels.. i will trade you one squirrel for a mongoose. That will sort out the snakes…

Bellatrix's avatar

What I want to know is .. where is @Blondesjon .. shouldn’t he be flagging our arses for hijacking his thread?

MilkyWay's avatar

FLOGGING OUR ARSES!!? WHAT ARE Y…. oops. You said flagging.
My bad.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@queenie wants to get flogged! @queenie wants to get flogged!

Berserker's avatar

With her own panties!

Bellatrix's avatar

Bring on the flogging…

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

*Door crashes in

“It’s the Spanish Inquisition!”

“No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!”

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

What a show, Inquisition, here we go…

Berserker's avatar

Pillooooooooow!!! Soft. ^^

Bellatrix's avatar

Damn… I bet @hawaii_jake has squirrel toe crushers.

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

Torquemada – do not implore him for compassion. Torquemada – do not beg him for forgiveness. Torquemada – do not ask him for mercy. Let’s face it, you can’t Torquemada anything!

Berserker's avatar

So yall. You guys know about a Medieval torture device, called the thumbscrew, a tool used to shatter toes and fingers?
Well, it’s also known as ’‘pilliwinks’’. How can something so fucking horrible in usage sound so cute in name lol.

augustlan's avatar

@queenie wants to be flogged? That can be arranged

Bellatrix's avatar

Pilliwinks… sounds nasty .. and it doesn’t sound like it would be targeting fingers or toes!!!

Berserker's avatar

No way it sounds totally cute lol. Cute like a sentient tire rolling around all day would be cute. :D

rooeytoo's avatar

Who let the dogs out?

Plucky's avatar

@rooeytoo…NSFW She did.

rooeytoo's avatar

@PluckyDog – OMG, someone please put the dogs in their house!!!

Plucky's avatar

Lol

Well…you did ask.
It’s too late for me to put an NSFW warning on it ..sorry, my bad.

augustlan's avatar

@PluckyDog I took care of the NSFW for you. :)

I’m hungry.

Plucky's avatar

@augustlan Wow, it’s like magic! Thank you. :)

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

Alvin and the Chipmunks! Good one @augustlan! Did anyone see their movie? Speaking of movies, has anyone seen a good one recently? I really want to spend an afternoon in an air-conditioned movie theater…it’s hot here.

Bellatrix's avatar

I saw the new pirates movie. Not going to win an Oscar but it was a fun movie and hey, you can look at Johnny Depp!

Plucky's avatar

Mmmm Johnny Depp…mmm wha.. huh?

augustlan's avatar

Did someone say Johnny Depp?

Plucky's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer I heard Bridesmaids was pretty good ..I have not seen it yet though.

MilkyWay's avatar

Flogging, boobs and now Johnny Depp? This is turning out to be an awesome thread :D

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

What’s your favorite Fluther thread? I lurve the one where one Jelly proposed to another.

Plucky's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer Seriously? That’s pretty cool.

I think any thread with Johnny Depp in it equals win.

MilkyWay's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer WOW
That must have been such an emotional and excited time for them

ucme's avatar

….& then Mickey Rooney fell inside Oprah’s cavernous pussy whilst pleasuring her orally!
He’ll be gone for days, poor little bugger.

Cruiser's avatar

There’s a squirrel locked in the frizzer…what DO I DO????

MilkyWay's avatar

@Cruiser Try to open the frizzer with some round toes shoes. Then whip that little bugger with my panties.
When you’re done, reward yourself with some pancakes ;)

rebbel's avatar

This is the best answer ever!

Coloma's avatar

7am sharp on the west coast, breakfast burritos and cantelope at my place, Who’s cookin”?

tedibear's avatar

I’ll cook, Coloma! Who’s hungry?

Cruiser's avatar

@queenie I don’t own round toe shoes only Mandals….will those work?

MilkyWay's avatar

@Cruiser Sure ;)

Cruiser's avatar

@queenie Pass the syrup please! :)

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Big mug of coffee please.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Thanks. Black, no sugar . . .

Coloma's avatar

Do you like red peppers strips in your breakfast burritos?

Aethelwine's avatar

I’m helping Jon prepare for his trip to the future but our son ate all the Fruity Pebbles. SHIT!!!!

ucme's avatar

Oh yay, oh yay!! It’s 5pm & all’s…..........crap!!

Coloma's avatar

8:41 over here now. The #^%!!! Turkeys are cleaning out the goose food, a lizard just ran under my couch, my neighbors are shooting their rifles and launching me out of my chair, but otherwise, tis a b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l morning!

WasCy's avatar

I would never hijack a thread. I think that’s despicable.

filmfann's avatar

What really annoys me is pick-up trucks with camper shells that have a rear hatch plexiglass door that swings back and forth reflecting sunlight into my eyes while driving!

Coloma's avatar

@filmfan

LOL

Hell, my own car blinds me in the garage in the mornings, if the door is up I get a laser hit to my baby blues…Gah! Blinded by the light of the silvery moon-roof!

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I prefer fresh strawberries to make strawberry short cake….. YUM

OKAY I edited it.

Coloma's avatar

@Tropical_Willie

Only one strawberry?
That’s a tiny little cake you make. :-D

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

WHERE IS MY OTHER MOCCASIN????/!#$%^&<strong>i(opoi</strong>&^%$#!@#$%^&*(op{poiuytre#wq

tedibear's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille – The lizard under @Coloma‘s couch took it.

Coloma's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille

Indian names for all!

Lucy one moccasin would you like to come over and hang out with ‘she came to talk”? lol

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@tedibear—To go canoeing??? XD
@Coloma—LOL! Sure! Is this a BYOS occasion?

Coloma's avatar

@Tropical_Willie

Indian name for you ‘one strawberry’. lolol

@lucillelucillelucille

Yes, bring your own moccasins, and some fire water. ;-)

Coloma's avatar

I think everyone should know that I am wearing polka dot socks, that do not match my flowery top, but do match the color of my clown shorts.

tedibear's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille Well, this canoe was too big for him, so he needs your shoe.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@Coloma-I had on my “Ragin Red” bathrobe on up until a few minutes ago…it always makes me feel like this
@tedibear—My ca-shoe is too big for a wildebeest! XD

Coloma's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille

Haha, love it!

Does anyone know that to melt copper you must have a temp. of 1083 degrees?
Shit, so much for my latest artsy idea, where can I lease foundary space?

.

ucme's avatar

After years of unwanted attention, Kermit the frog tells Miss Piggy to go fuck herself!!
She was last seen pleasuring herself in her bedroom with a good sized pork sausage.
A piggy vibrator known locally as “the banger!”

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@Coloma The image is W O W . Now to go with the polka dots and flowery top…....

Flame orange – - spiked hair.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Okay, I’ve seen Johnny Depp and flogging mentioned here…... where do I sign up?

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Was there a direction this “HI” Jack was going?

Coloma's avatar

@Tropical_Willie

Well ya know, the PJ trunk is full of surprises, mix-n-match at 6am, and, great clown pony tail goin’ on, no orange spikes. haha

Kermit FINALLY dissed snooty Miss Piggy…well, he must have gotten his self esteem in order after years of Piggy abuse. lolol

Coloma's avatar

Who wants to mow my yard this fine morning?
I’ll make you my killer pepper steak sandwich for lunch! ;-)

_zen_'s avatar

No way I’m going to read up 87 posts.

_zen_'s avatar

I’ll just hijack it the way the OP says.

_zen_'s avatar

Who feels like pizza?

bkcunningham's avatar

Speaking of high jacking. I was having sex with my boyfriend on the roof the other night. (Don’t tell my husband.) Well actually, we’ve had sex for three days straight. I am very concerned. Could I be pregnant. Last time I had my period was on June 4, 2011 , it lasted until June 7th. It was only 3 days which is very odd for me considering I am 50 years old. Before I had gotten my period on the 4th, I had gotten it 22 days before that. I had unprotected sex with him. I mean we went up on the roof and could have falalen. He was cumming inside from the 4th until the 7th numerous times a night but I swear I never swallowed.

On the 7th of June about four years ago my period suddenly stopped. After the 7th I had a very bad pain in my lower right side , by my hip, it went away after a day or two. I crave certain foods after I smoke weed. Well, not certain foods, ALL foods.…It’s only the 10th so I don’t believe I’d be showing symptoms this early. I feel like I am eating a lot and gaining a lot of weight. I’m getting as big as a pig actually. I want to exercise, but I’m not really motivated. ANYWAY…. When should I take a test? Not the drug test, I studied and passed that. I mean the pee on the stick, prego test. Is it even possible to get pregnant on my period? Sperm can live in my system for a while, is that something to be concerned about as well? I mean, what is it doing in there this whole time. Could sperm be some liberal spy thing that is monitoring my movement? And, any other advice would be amazing, thanks so much and have a terrific day and yes I understand the whole STD thing. It is a NASCAR sponsor, right? Thanks every one for your help.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@bkcunningham If you never swallowed, then you should be fine. If you’re concerned, however, take a test immediately. Don’t forget- you’re supposed to lick the end of the stick for approximately 10 seconds. Don’t pee on it, that would taste really bad.

And yes, the sperm belong to the CIA, and they’re watching you at all times now. You may feel a little less invaded if you douche about 10 times in a row. And please, remember, those little sperm are not innocent. In fact, if you’re not careful, they will [REDACTED]

MilkyWay's avatar

Oookay, boobs, flogging, Johnny Depp and sperm? I’m gettin kinda giddy now.
XD

rebbel's avatar

Is there a holiday in America or something…., it is so quiet?

MilkyWay's avatar

@rebbel I’m screaming my head off here, but they’ve been told to stay quiet or else they’ll get whipped harder. ;)

Coloma's avatar

I just got called into work this afternoon, so no more hijacking for me. :-D

LuckyGuy's avatar

Religion! There! I said it!

Berserker's avatar

@worriedguy Ah durn it, now you dun gone fucked up real good! XD

rebbel's avatar

Jack probably will feel loved today.

MilkyWay's avatar

I wish I could give this another 100 GQs :D

Berserker's avatar

Me too lol.

FutureMemory's avatar

What the fuck is going on here>?

MilkyWay's avatar

@FutureMemory ^fuck?
(Faints)

WasCy's avatar

Fucking government ruined things, as usual.

Cruiser's avatar

Where would the be the best place to look for my keys??

rebbel's avatar

Under the…oh, never mind.

ucme's avatar

This is one long Canadian grand prix…..sheesh!

Dutchess_III's avatar

I thought we were talking about salt..?

Dutchess_III's avatar

@bkcunningham ROFLLLLLLOLLLL!!!!

Cruiser's avatar

@bkcunningham Didn’t your mama tell you to watch out for those NASCAR Sponsor types?? Worse than rock and roll roadies! Better get tested! ;))

Dutchess_III's avatar

Funniest thread EVER! @zen It’s worth reading from the top! I’m rolling around on the floor for no apparent reason and my husband thinks I’m crazy!

Wait….did you guys say @bkcunningham is pregnant with Johnny Depp’s baby??? I’m so jealous.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I just won $50 trillion dollars in a Zambian lottery! All I have to do is send them my account information, and they’ll wire the money right away!

MasterAir16's avatar

PAH-OLICE PO-PO-POL-POLICE!!
THEY ARE HERE!

run for your life!

Dutchess_III's avatar

Take a deep breat @MasterAir16. That’s just Auggie. She’s harmless. Just show her something shiny and you can get away with anything.

Blondesjon's avatar

i can’t believe you dicks hijacked my thread

Dutchess_III's avatar

Auggie started it.

auntydeb's avatar

What?
Where am I?
Who said that?
...speak up, can’t hear you
Why, why… WHY?
Whose go is it now?

Ladymia69's avatar

How the hell am I supposed to eat this soup with an envelope?!?!?!!?!!?!?!?!?!!

Plucky's avatar

Dang mosquitoes :::swat::: ugh :::spray::: ..gahhhh!

rooeytoo's avatar

@hawaii_jake – that couldn’t be true, my husband just told me that he won it! Well maybe we will get to meet in person now whilst you all divide the spoils.

To all, do you walk to work or carry your lunch?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Can you give me directions to Zambia?

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@rooeytoo : My lunch carries me. I ride on a cow.

@Dutchess_III : You should have turned left at Albuquerque.

Plucky's avatar

This is the only way I travel.

Ladymia69's avatar

I don’t care about your love for African violets, I have a back spasm malt chocolate liquid cocaine sandwich over here.

Coloma's avatar

I met the greatest hippie kid who had hitch hiked & stole away on trains from Milwaukee in my store this afternoon. He had a giant earring, like Aborigine gage, and a strange little goatee that made him look like a devil.He wore board shorts and a backpack and bought ” The Pearl earring’ book to read by the river.

We looked at & discussed” The history of poverty in the U.S.” together and I made him some tea.

Who loves hippie kids?

I do! I do!—The 60’s & 70’s are alive and well in my zone. :_D

Michael_Huntington's avatar

TIL Uncle Phil was Shredder in the old TMNT episodes.

rebbel's avatar

Why did that Why won’t my boyfriend marry me? got pulled?

Bellatrix's avatar

It didn’t. I just answered it or did I answer a ghost thread…oops!

rebbel's avatar

@Bellatrix Yeah, i see it is back again, i guess it was gone for editing.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I love Hippie kids too!!!!

My boyfriend thinks he is pregnant. How can we tell?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Dutchess_III Yank on his pecker. If he screams, he’s pregnant.

Dutchess_III's avatar

LOL!! Wait…there are five guys here…...........................WOW! They’re ALL pregnant!!!!

Berserker's avatar

So I wrote a whole review of a game for a video game site, and then when submitting it, it said that my server is a piece of shit and that it couldn’t handle the length of the URL. What?? Fuck. I just lost two hours of my damn worthless life writing about a game nobody’s ever played haha. Anger.

Coloma's avatar

@Symbeline

Have a slurpee with a double shot of Grey Goose, you’ll feel better soon.

Tres Pacifico Claras on the west coast and the peeper steak is sauteeing now.

I mean PEPPER steak, but who knows, maybe a frog jumped into the skillet, anything can happen over here in frog & lizard land.

Coloma's avatar

Lets talk about terminal velocity.

Do you know how fast a dead Cantelope can travel on the down hill slope?

Berserker's avatar

As fast as a galactic centipede. And that’s slow. Damn space ballads.

bkcunningham's avatar

Coloma drinks Grey Goose. Now that there is funny.

Coloma's avatar

@bkcunningham

But of course, I must be true to the flock. lol

Centipedes…oh my, creepy little crawlies they are.
I once closed the door on a giant millipede, it was like squishing a mouse, awful bloody mess it was.

Bellatrix's avatar

I was thinking that too @bkcunningham, hope it isn’t made from geese.

I don’t like centipedes and millipedes much. Galactic centipedes sound truly scary.

Berserker's avatar

@Bellatrix They have spiders for heads. But they like classical music, so they help me sleep.

That revolves around the game I reviewed…my poor review, lost in fucking oblivion…:(

bkcunningham's avatar

I like Belvedere vodka. Ohhh Belvedereee. Remember that cartoon? I saw a cartoon about a creepy crawlie snake. Someone asked about the creepy crawlie candy machine they had when they were a kid. I had a candy machine that made whistles out of Tootsie Rolls. I never liked the flavored Tootsie Rolls. I guess it is a matter of taste. Some people like Grey Goose and some like Belvedere. Ohhh Belvedereee. Remember that cartoon?

wilma's avatar

I do @bkcunningham .

I have a dream question…
not really.

I like my Grey Goose right out of the frizzer.
with pancakes.

Aethelwine's avatar

I just did the BEST Sharon Osborne impersonation. just sayin’

yay…..beer

wilma's avatar

I don’t really like beer.
The only kind of beer I can even drink is black and creamy and kind of syrupy thick.

Bellatrix's avatar

I like beer. I had a dream about hippos the other day, what does that mean I wonder? I am also going to try Fundevogel’s recipe for vegies for dinner.

@Symbeline It stinks when the interweb eats your work. I have been trying for days to write a piece I am working on and my brain keeps screaming NOOOO. Meh.. I don’t want to do it.

TexasDude's avatar

Equine phallus.

Bellatrix's avatar

Possibly the wrong facial expression given what you typed. :D

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Since we are talking about hijacking a thread lets do it right with a full boarding party after a shot a cross the bow.

Speaking of phalluses….

Some question ago it was asked ”How good are you” pertaining to ones ability to write steamy or graphic content, I can’t remember which, but I can hijack this thread in a really big way. Now I know people will be interested but they will quell their interest and just move past the following text, but at least I would have had a big enough hijack as to have people not actually hijack this thread anymore than it has. My hijack was my answer of said question:

Elliot enters his suite, his tailored suit still crisp though the day was long. He goes to the bathroom to draw a bath, as the water starts to suds up he moves back the bedroom. He draws the drapes slightly thinking, “Man look at this view? There is none better in all of Spain.” He slips out of his $400 designer shoes and places his Cartier watch on the night table. About the time, he whips off his silk shirt there is a knock at the door. He pusses the shirt back on but not buttoned. He goes to his jacket, slips his pistol out with suppressor still attached, and goes to the door. He peeks out of the poop hole to see the face of a stunning redhead. He opens the door with the pistol hidden behind his back. “Can I help you?” he asks her.
The woman replies, “You forget I was coming?”
Elliot looks puzzled. The woman says to him, “This is room 324 is it not?”
Elliot responded, “T-t-that is one floor up” while still captivated by her.
She mused, “Well that is a shame” and opened her floor length fur to reveal she had not a thread of clothes on. Elliot’s eye opened wider. Her body was flawless, like carved from stone of the many statues around Cordoba.
Elliot tells her, “I think I heard whoever upstairs leave; in fact I am sure of it. You should step in, considering your condition.”
The woman replies, “Will I be safe?”
Elliot responds with more confidence, “Oh yeah…….you will be very safe”.
He lets her into the room and offers her a drink. “Make yourself at home I will be just a moment. She goes to the bed and he stashes the pistol under the sink in the kitchenette. He goes to the wet bar and deftly slams two drinks together. He glides back into the bedroom to see her gone. “In here handsome,” she calls from the bathroom. Elliot peeks in to see the fur hanging and her in his bubbles.
“Well, going to bring me that drink? I hope you don’t mind me using your bath, it was almost full anyhow.”
“No……go right ahead.”, responded Elliot. As he approached her with the drink, she takes it and grabs his wrist. “I can really use some help washing, my back and…….other….places….”
Elliot quickly enters the bath with her after shedding his clothes. The next hour’s time was filled with him nibbling places on her only her OB has seen. She touched parts of his body in way no woman has ever touched them before. The action continued to the bed where he drank of her nectar and she milked him for every inch of his man-milk. She swirled her tongue about his rock hard dumbstick and lapped at it greedily like a kid over a rocket pop on a hot day. When he parted her wet lips he nearly passed out how soft and wet she was. As he started to piston her in the doggie position, he had to restrain himself from blasting his hot spunk deep in her honey cave. He rode her hard and put her away wet. In a sweaty heap, they fell exhausted atop the satin sheets.
The next morning Elliot woke to rustling in the room, the redhead was getting dressed in a pair of booty short and one of his shirts. To the puzzled look on Elliot’s face she said, “The shorts were in my pocket, but I have to go now.”
Elliot discovers his hands cuffed to the headboard, “Bloody hell! What is going on here? The woman said, “It was fun but I have what I came after.” Showing him the Halliburton, he entered the room with last night.
Elliot bellowed, “You are going to leave me here?”
She tossed him a jar of Vaseline, “I am not cruel woman, entertain yourself. You be nice, play with yourself quietly, and shoot your gun I will not have to shoot you with mine” showing him a chrome Beretta Cougar 8040 mini. “Unlike you, I have no suppressor.” Elliot’s eyes darted in the direction of the kitchenette. “Mine will make a bigger pop than your dick and I will have to run in these heels; I won’t be happy”. With that she threw on her fur, walked to the door and hung the do not disturb sign on the door and dashed for the elevator.

MilkyWay's avatar

Wha..?

Plucky's avatar

Ditto @queenie.

_zen_'s avatar

Actually, you never said anything about the rainforest.

MilkyWay's avatar

@zen I did.

choreplay's avatar

Hey guys, just got here, what are we talking about? By the way, quick question: Should the atheist husband of a Christian woman allow her to have an abortion if there’s a chance the kid might grow up and turn into a gay Mormon?

jrpowell's avatar

@Season_of_Fall :: Certainly, without those people who would destroy jobs as effectively as Mitt Romney has?

MilkyWay's avatar

Rainforests are having abortions as the atheist leaves Johnny Depp has boobs that got

whipped with round toe cap shoes which likes pizza when sperm died the Grand Prix which

creeps Witches with sabre tooth tigers that like fireworks in pants and panties with

squished squirrels in snakes stomach that jack off reading Shakespeare shiny granny

flogging during the Spanish Inquisition with Torquemada pillows giving

medieval torture in pilliwinks pirate dog house when Alvin and the Chipmunks watch Fluther

proposal in Oprah’s frizzer has pancakes, eating burritos coffee and fruity pebbles are crap

and pick-up trucks

with strawberries eating moccasin clowns with spikes hair eat pork sausages CIA holiday

with Jack working for religion govenment uncle Phil rides a cow smelling African violets with

hippy kid boyfriend who is pregnant with centipede ghost listening to classic music fuck

police under the Zambian salt lottery while swatting mosquitoes with envelopes and review

game when slurpee dead Cantelope and Belvedere Vodka and had a dream of Sharon

Osbourne drinking Equine Phallus Beer and Elliot on top satin sheets and Mitt Romney.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@queenie I think we can get you job writing scripts for Soap Operas or Jerry Springer.

auntydeb's avatar

Oh… it’s all gone frizzer-up now.

choreplay's avatar

Oh I love Jerry Springer. (not really) Lets talk about him!!!!!

ucme's avatar

Hi Jack! How’s it swinging man? ;¬}

Coloma's avatar

Jerry Springer math quiz:

” Yolanda has 19 children born 15 months apart from 11 different fathers.
She had her first child at age12, and has borne children in 16 states.

How old is Yolanda?

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Not old enough to know better.

almost 36

ucme's avatar

Andy Murray wins at Queen’s, nice warm up for Wimbledon!

Coloma's avatar

Going to be a whopping 90 over here today, nice cool June so far, it’s a tease.

MilkyWay's avatar

wOO, It is a hot day today, no kidding.

choreplay's avatar

Anyone feel like this thread is one big long experience in Attention Deficit Disorder.

WasCy's avatar

Don’t get me started.

Coloma's avatar

@Season_of_Fall

Non-linear minds combined. lol

Chocolate covered raisens for all!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Season_of_Fall Now that you bring up ADD, I think we need to talk about a few important…..

….......WHO WANTS TIGER BUTTER??????

rebbel's avatar

Whatever i said already…., i agree.

Aethelwine's avatar

Now, a question of etiquette – as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

The crotch please.

MilkyWay's avatar

Both ;)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

BTW, Cruiser and I have just been having an interesting discussion about eating my car, so that it won’t melt or be destroyed by out of control children…... anyone else interested in helping devour the car?

MilkyWay's avatar

Mmmm, metal :D

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Nooo…... chocolate, lol. See current avatar, teehee.

choreplay's avatar

Eat what? ohhh look at that shiny thing.

choreplay's avatar

Reminds me of the movie Up, SQUIRREL

MilkyWay's avatar

@Chocolate Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Why is the crotch preferred over the ass?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Because I’m “bi-curious”, not “butt-curious”. :P

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

If the Human Centipede was done with as many people as centipede have legs, which position would suck the most?

AmWiser's avatar

OKAY!!! What the heck is going on here. I’ve just been selected to [REDACTED] this post and I’m not reading all 183 posts. So simply explain all the shenanagins.:D

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@AmWiser It’s kind of like Seinfeld. It’s not about anything.

choreplay's avatar

Yes it is! It’s about everything!!!!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Season_of_Fall Much better answer.

choreplay's avatar

“It’s all connected, Hobbs! It’s all related!!!” Calvin and Hobbs

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Those were two dogs I didn’t need to see.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Is there salt int he rainforest?

Plucky's avatar

My African dwarf frog is shedding.

Cruiser's avatar

Am I pregnant? How will I know for sure?

Plucky's avatar

@Cruiser ..maybe when you start shedding.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I think I’m preggie with a pachyderm, there is an elephant trunk hanging out.

bkcunningham's avatar

OMG, people. People what is happening here. We should get a life. Anyone interested in forming an Internet forum where people talk about things. You know, anything. Things you might need help with, or more information about, things that don’t make sense to anyone but you and you want an opinion from a different view…I dunno, what do you think? It could be like a commune forum where we all live in harmony and share equally of our valuable knowledge.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Hijack limerick time!

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who had a ________ so long he could ________
With a _________ eating grin
he wiped _________ from his chin,
and said if my ear was a _________ I could ________ it.

choreplay's avatar

@cruiser see @WillWorkForChocolate response on how to know above.

Bellatrix's avatar

What is an African dwarf frog? Do they have frog throwing comps?

Cruiser, are your man boobies sore? Do you feel a bit sick? If you hold a wedding ring on a piece of string over your belly while lying on the floor does it move in a figure of eight action?

Pink Floyd rules!

choreplay's avatar

Can anyone tell me how to create a link that goes to a particular post in this thread?

Plucky's avatar

Umm

Coloma's avatar

I just ran over my new garden hose and flattened the nozzle…shit. lol

Plucky's avatar

@Coloma Return it.. say it um imploded.

rooeytoo's avatar

Did you know a 48 year old Queensland lady just broke the record for the longest ever open water swim by male or female!

Let’s hear it for the girls!!!

rooeytoo's avatar

@PluckyDog – wow, that is a great one, lurve lurve lurve to you!!!

augustlan's avatar

I’m hungry, I tell you.

bkcunningham's avatar

Let’s hear it for the 48 year old woman from Queensland! Pretty women wonder where my secret lies. I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size. But when I start to
tell them, they think I’m telling lies. I say, it’s in the reach of my arms, the span of my hips, the stride of my step, the curl of my lips. I’m a woman.Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman. That’s me. To all the women. Written by another phenomenal woman. MA

WasCy's avatar

@Season_of_Fall

I can.

What’s more, I will.

1. Find the permalink for the specific quip to the right of the “Flag as…” tag below the quip.
2. Click the permalink, which will take you to the same page, but where that quip will appear to be at the top of the page that you’re taken to.
3. Grab the URL for the permalink from your browser’s address bar and Ctrl-C ‘copy’ it.
4. Start your message, and enter ” click this shortcut ” : Ctrl-V paste-link-there, (but without the spaces that I added), to get: click this shortcut and there you are.

Cruiser's avatar

@Season_of_Fall From what I read on Wiki I must be pregnant as I am craving chocolate frosted meatloaf!

Plucky's avatar

I’m still learning.

SpatzieLover's avatar

I’m hungry. What’s for lunch?

choreplay's avatar

@Cruiser here is what @willworkforchocolate suggested as a sure fire test. I’m not helping you though
Talk to @willworkforchocolate.

erichw1504's avatar

I love lamp.

Cruiser's avatar

YIKES XO @Season_of_Fall There will be none of that kind of pregnancy testing going on here! No siree Bob! ;)

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Cruiser Do what @WillWorkForChocolate said up there, right under one of my posts…

Plucky's avatar

I got hit in the head with an egg today. Such is my life.

MilkyWay's avatar

Mothers (sigh)

Dutchess_III's avatar

Are you my mother?

Plucky's avatar

Lol @SpatzieLover ..that’s kind of gross actually.

SpatzieLover's avatar

=P Made ya’ look though!

Cruiser's avatar

@Dutchess_III she did and I must be pregnant….HS that hurt! XD

erichw1504's avatar

I want to have your babies.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

This thread is not in the frizzer yet?

erichw1504's avatar

Nope, still under the orange tree.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

With a turtle.

MilkyWay's avatar

And a gun.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

And a bucket of KFC.

MilkyWay's avatar

And some Dr Pepper

Tropical_Willie's avatar

And Moon Pie, YUM ! ! !

closest I could get to rhyming gun! ;>)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Tropical_Willie You could try “Getting oral from a nun”

MilkyWay's avatar

Whilst having a picnic under the sun.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Yah, and it would still be about eating, chewing and swallowing.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Hey I could have meant getting oral hygiene from a nun.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Ow – - You meant there might be more than a tooth brushing !

erichw1504's avatar

“Here come the ants, run!”

Plucky's avatar

Popcorn doesn’t always come out as wonderful as it went in.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Ouch!

erichw1504's avatar

@PluckyDog That’s what she said.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Anyone still in this thread after 6pm PST will have to drink from a bucket I cart from the bathroom

MilkyWay's avatar

Not me. I’ll drink from the tap.

erichw1504's avatar

@Hypocrisy_Central what if I already did?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’m hijacking this thread with spam.

erichw1504's avatar

We’re goin’ streakin’!

SpatzieLover's avatar

Hi Jack!

erichw1504's avatar

The thread has been Jacked.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

@erichw1504 As long as you had ½ lb of haggis and chiterlings with it, then you are excused.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Stop Jacking around!

erichw1504's avatar

Go Jack yourself!

SpatzieLover's avatar

Jack Off!

choreplay's avatar

Only 252, well now 253 post. Can we keep it going with more meaningless chatter. There are perfectly good controversial religious threads out there that are missing our attention. Where is the fighting where is the challenge… look shiny… where was I, oh ya, Africa as a continent still has its day comming, I mean after all, all those natural resourses and all those half naked bush women. Speaking of half naked, there are a whole bunch of sex question threads missing our attention as well. No, I take it back we always find time to answer those. Fun threads, ;) . So lets get back to the topic at hand, no wait, Hands, I could never be a hand model, just that my knuckles are too hairy, well on that note I’m too hairy all over. Sorry to my wife, promise honey you can wax my back. Hah, honey, wax, Bees, see the connection. They say if you eat local honey you can thwart local alergies. Alergies, what are you alergic to, maybe some person in your life. Not me like everyone in it, accept for that support staff person, well that was in another thread, what were we talking about, oh ya, the natural resourses of Siberia, ooo reminds me of an item on my bucket list, some day take the Siberian Express from Russia into China. I love trains, we went on one for our honey moon. The train tour of Eastern Canada, boy are we blessed to have Canada as a neighbor, could you imagine having Iran or Russia as a neighbor, oh ya Russia is, after all Sara Palin can see it from her house. As a republican, at least for now, I really don’t think Sara is a serious candidate for the White House, no thanks. Thanks, makes me think of Thanksgiving, wonder if we are going to have to do it at my in-laws house this year. I really don’t like spending holidays that uncomfortable. Like mixing oil and water. Now oil and vinigar I enjoy, over sliced tomatos and cucumbers. Anyone else enjoy that. Do I really care if anyone else enjoys that, do I even know if anyone is still even reading this thread, Hey if your still reading send me your address and I will send you a dollar. Ah, the American dollar, when we took our honey moon to Canada the Canadian dollar was 60 cents to every American dollar. Speaking of Canada, I really hate how many times my father in law had told me that multiple Canadian geese are properly called Canada Geese, who cares. Are the numbers still reading this thread falling off fast. Hey send me your address and I’ll send two dollars. Getting tired and bored of this post. Here let me repeat myself.

Only 252, well now 253 post. Can we keep it going with more meaningless chatter. There are perfectly good controversial religious threads out there that are missing our attention. Where is the fighting where is the challenge… look shiny… where was I, oh ya, Africa as a continent still has its day comming, I mean after all, all those natural resourses and all those half naked bush women. Speaking of half naked, there are a whole bunch of sex question threads missing our attention as well. No, I take it back we always find time to answer those. Fun threads, ;) . So lets get back to the topic at hand, no wait, Hands, I could never be a hand model, just that my knuckles are too hairy, well on that note I’m too hairy all over. Sorry to my wife, promise honey you can wax my back. Hah, honey, wax, Bees, see the connection. They say if you eat local honey you can thwart local alergies. Alergies, what are you alergic to, maybe some person in your life. Not me like everyone in it, accept for that support staff person, well that was in another thread, what were we talking about, oh ya, the natural resourses of Siberia, ooo reminds me of an item on my bucket list, some day take the Siberian Express from Russia into China. I love trains, we went on one for our honey moon. The train tour of Eastern Canada, boy are we blessed to have Canada as a neighbor, could you imagine having Iran or Russia as a neighbor, oh ya Russia is, after all Sara Palin can see it from her house. As a republican, at least for now, I really don’t think Sara is a serious candidate for the White House, no thanks. Thanks, makes me think of Thanksgiving, wonder if we are going to have to do it at my in-laws house this year. I really don’t like spending holidays that uncomfortable. Like mixing oil and water. Now oil and vinigar I enjoy, over sliced tomatos and cucumbers. Anyone else enjoy that. Do I really care if anyone else enjoys that, do I even know if anyone is still even reading this thread, Hey if your still reading send me your address and I will send you a dollar. Ah, the American dollar, when we took our honey moon to Canada the Canadian dollar was 60 cents to every American dollar. Speaking of Canada, I really hate how many times my father in law had told me that multiple Canadian geese are properly called Canada Geese, who cares. Are the numbers still reading this thread falling off fast. Hey send me your address and I’ll send two dollars. Getting tired and bored of this post. Here let me repeat myself. Ok now I’m getting just plain obnoxious and hell no I’m not going to spell check this. Bring on the Grammer Natzis. Welcome to my head. If anyone is still reading this send me your address and I’ll send you $5.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

You spelled Nazi wrong. Sheesh.

SpatzieLover's avatar

also spelled Alergies, what are you alergic WRONG!~

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

After you have ate chiterlings you can’t spell correctly.

choreplay's avatar

No I can’t spell vary guud at al

SpatzieLover's avatar

Where’s my dollar?

Plucky's avatar

$5 for me!

choreplay's avatar

Send me your address, and shame you didn’t read further, it got up to 5

SpatzieLover's avatar

but I only need a one

choreplay's avatar

I set it up as a conundrum (haha, spelled conundrum wright), because no sane person would send me their address, not for a dollar or even five. If you send me it and prove that you are insane, well than you just imagined I said I would send you a dollar. Yes it’s up there in the text but because your seeing things that aren’t there. It’s not really there (waves hand like a Jedi). By the way I really do know how to spell “right” correctly.

Coloma's avatar

Everyone send me your address and $20

Then, I’ll throw a party.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Incorrectly spelled words: comming, resoursesm alergies, Alergies, alergic, vinigar, tomatos, Natzis, and best of all….GRAMMER!!!

Didn’t you say something about paying 20 bucks per incorrectly spelled word? Is that $25.00 to every Fluther member?

Plucky's avatar

@Coloma ..wait um don’t we need your address? Or are you coming here ..with your little gander?

Coloma's avatar

@PluckyDog

No, parties here, in goose territory, I need the cash and an address to send the invitations. :-D

Dutchess_III's avatar

Goin to PM…

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I wore a purple shirt today…

choreplay's avatar

Out of all the attempts to highjack this thread, I think my misspelling did it. lol You all just can’t resist the urge to correct.

Purple, nice @willworkforchocolate

No, no mention of payment for misspelled words. Man oh man, if I paid for every misspelled word I typed I’d be in debt forever.

Bellatrix's avatar

You and me both @Season_of_Fall. Aren’t we lucky there always seems to be someone around to point of our errors :D

choreplay's avatar

@Bellatrix that would be one huge under statement.

Bellatrix's avatar

lol and I put “of errors” instead of “out our errors”. Almost guaranteed.

choreplay's avatar

Ya, but the thing is @Bellatrix I knew exactly what you meant, so we’re good.

Dutchess_III's avatar

And there is always someone to point out mine. The first time I ever got busted (on Wisdm) was because I spelled…“Grammar” like “Grammer.” See. :) Been lots and lots of corrections sence then. testing

@Season_of_Fall Ah hell! It just hit me…twas you on PM! Pi fight!!!! AND, further, I believe you own every Fluther member $30 for each misspelled word. Go see my post as proof. humph!

choreplay's avatar

No, never agreed to that. You know, most of my misspelling is due to combination of phonetics and muscle memory on the typing not being programmed correctly. I can’t afford to pay everyone that so will have to pay with sexual favors, oh, wait, wife said I couldn’t do that, sorry.

choreplay's avatar

ya ya; wisdom grammar and since. I’m not that bad

Dutchess_III's avatar

o god. no!
No, you’re not bad at all! I guess we’ll let you live! : )

choreplay's avatar

O thank God!

SpatzieLover's avatar

Oh crap @WillWorkForChocolate…you aren’t spreading virus now are you?

MilkyWay's avatar

I want a huggle

Plucky's avatar

(huggles @queenie)

Bellatrix's avatar

Aww hugs @queenie

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Where’s @bunnygrl ? With all the huggies.

erichw1504's avatar

Tuesday’s coming, did you bring your coat?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

No, I prefer to greet Tuesday naked.

erichw1504's avatar

But, what about Naked Fridays?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Only when it’s pink.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I shouldn’t ask, but: What is pink?

erichw1504's avatar

My [REDACTED] is usually pink.

MilkyWay's avatar

My lost panties are pink.
(((Hugs and huggles @Bellatrix @PluckyDog back))) ^-^

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Pervert. I like it. :P

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Oops. I’m caught again. :)

erichw1504's avatar

I am feeling fat and sassy.

MilkyWay's avatar

@erichw1504 Wanna cuddle?

erichw1504's avatar

@queenie are you sure you want to cuddle with a fat and sassy man?

MilkyWay's avatar

@erichw1504 And smelly? Yeah, I’m sure.
XD

Dutchess_III's avatar

Did someone say ‘chocolate?’ (Don’t turn on the lights cause I don’t wanna see…..)

Blondesjon's avatar

Abortions for everyone!!! The first one is always free.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Not cool.

Blondesjon's avatar

if you’d feel better payin’, it’s cool

Bellatrix's avatar

It’s Fridaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay .. I love Friday.

Plucky's avatar

It’s Thursday…silly future people. :P

Bellatrix's avatar

Tis not… it’s Froiyday .. said with an Aussie accent.

choreplay's avatar

You suck, you get Friday before us.

Bellatrix's avatar

Yes we do! I will give you a look into the future, it is a beautiful day. Blue skies, fresh breeze, birdies tweeting. It will be with you soon.

Plucky's avatar

Lies!

Dutchess_III's avatar

Heh! It’s Froyday for me and I live in Kansas! Somehow I wound up with a 4 day work week through the summer! Eat ya hearts out!

Bellatrix's avatar

:-O It is not you plucky dog you!!!

Lol, I love four day weeks… they are the best. We shouldn’t be too smug @Dutchess_III. That @PluckyDog might nip :D

Plucky's avatar

Lol ..pffft silly kitties.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Bellatrix I have a secret…Plucky Dog has no teeth left!

Plucky's avatar

@Dutchess_III Lol my dog has no front teeth left ..and he can still nip. I’ll gum nip you! :P

Bellatrix's avatar

[Going to steal from Milo here]

Jasper here: If that gummy dog gets me, I’ll get wet fur. Yuck!

Dutchess_III's avatar

JASPER JUST HIJACKED MILO’S THREAD!! GET ‘EM PLUCKYDOG!!!

Bellatrix's avatar

I should point out, Jasper has left the building.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Good job @PluckyDog! You terrifying old thang you!

Bellatrix's avatar

He just doesn’t like dog spit on his fur.

And just to sidetrack from Plucky Dog’s cat terrorising. Why don’t cats get to wear little coats in winter?

KateTheGreat's avatar

Soooooooooo, anyone like giraffes?

Bellatrix's avatar

Hey KatetheGreat…where have you beeeeeeeeen! I love giraffes. The giraffes at Taronga Park Zoo in Sydney have the best view in the world.link

link

Here is another one link

KateTheGreat's avatar

@Bellatrix Message me! It’s a long story!

That giraffe is pretty sexy. Has he got a name?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Does the giraffe have a little coat to wear in winter?

KateTheGreat's avatar

@Dutchess_III Probably not, but I’m sure that I can knit him a sweater.

Plucky's avatar

@Bellatrix Some cats wear coats.

Bellatrix's avatar

lol no @Dutchess_III. He has his own little place to go with this family to keep warm though. That view would be worth millions.

@KatetheGreat, if he does, I don’t know it.

Bellatrix's avatar

Lol@plucky dog… I am not showing my cat that coat. He will want one.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Your cat will be lying @Bellatrix!

Bellatrix's avatar

No, he is a bit of a rogue I think. I think he might think a leather jacket would really suit his persona. Personally, I think he would look ridiculous. :D

Dutchess_III's avatar

Plaid. Seriously.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Plaid pants.

AmWiser's avatar

What the heck if sufferin’ succotash???

augustlan's avatar

It’s Friday

Don’t hate me.

erichw1504's avatar

There needs to be a “Horrible Answer” button made just for @augustlan‘s response.

Dutchess_III's avatar

DAMN TICKS!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I feel like some Rocky Mountain Oysters.

Dutchess_III's avatar

that’s gross
So..@Adirondackwannabe, exactly what DO Rocky Mountian Oysters feel like? Hm?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Dutchess_III Reach over to your S/O, reach between his legs and you’ll get an idea of what they feel like.

Dutchess_III's avatar

So does, like, YOUR whole body feel like that @Adirondackwannabe? : )

erichw1504's avatar

Now I’m in the mood for the rocky road ice cream.

Dutchess_III's avatar

There’s a wasp in your shoe.

erichw1504's avatar

There’s an elephant in your pocket.

MilkyWay's avatar

There’s a camel in my panties

Dutchess_III's avatar

Your panties look good on that camel, @queenie.

MilkyWay's avatar

I know, my panties look good on everything ;)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Why does the word panties sound sexy?

MilkyWay's avatar

Hmmmm… I have no idea….really :P

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’m wearing plaid boxers. That sounds boring. But throw out pink panties and that sounds sexy.

MilkyWay's avatar

That’s because they’re my pink panties ;)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Yeah, and you’re also known as jailbait in the US. Although I did have to laugh. :)

MilkyWay's avatar

<—- Laughing hard XD

erichw1504's avatar

<——Hardly laughing :|

Dutchess_III's avatar

<————don’t get it. Not laughing at all ^^^^ I

erichw1504's avatar

<——————————————My arrow is longer than yours.

Dutchess_III's avatar

THAT’S THE FIRST TIME I EVER DID THE ARROW THING!! I just didn’t know when to stop!
<———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

MilkyWay's avatar

Stop being so childish, the both of you.
Tut tut.

erichw1504's avatar

<~ now mine is just short and bent.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Hey, what if that reminds me of my penis?

MilkyWay's avatar

<—— Died laughing. XD

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@queenie Sure, make fun of someone’s shortcomings. :)

MilkyWay's avatar

I’m sure it’s not always like that, so… I’m not being mean :P

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I wasn’t worried. I’m in my it’s friday anything goes mood. Have fun with it.

erichw1504's avatar

@queenie actually it is.

Dutchess_III's avatar

(—- ROFLS!!!

erichw1504's avatar

@Dutchess_III Now yours is looking a little flat.

MilkyWay's avatar

Hers is supposed to look flat genius.

erichw1504's avatar

@queenie Flat and sticking out?

Dutchess_III's avatar

That’s my butt, you see!

erichw1504's avatar

~turns head clockwise~ OOoohhhh!

erichw1504's avatar

So, does anybody know who this “Jack” guy is? And is he actually high or does he just like to say “Hi!”?

Dutchess_III's avatar

NOT LIKE THAT @erichw1504!!! I didn’t even think. Ok. It’s side view. Brat! (

erichw1504's avatar

Surprised nobody has tried doing the “eight equals capital d”.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

8=D Hello Jack.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

A moose once bit my sister.

KateTheGreat's avatar

I heard my neighbors having sex this morning.

Cruiser's avatar

Happy Birthday @lucillelucillelucille :)

choreplay's avatar

Happy Birthday @lucillelucillelucille , bet you can’t guess how I knew!!!

Bellatrix's avatar

Oh Happy Birthday @lucillelucillelucille. Hope you had a lovely day.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Thuper happy birthday @lucillelucillelucille!!! Hugs and chocolate to you, my dear!

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

A fine time for a Happy birthday @lucillelucillelucille, I just bought in a gusher out there in the fields, fine time not to follow my thread @lucillelucillelucille… (you have to imagine it with music)

WasCy's avatar

You picked a fine time to have a birthday, @lucillelucillelucille.

augustlan's avatar

Happy birthday, Lucyx3!

MilkyWay's avatar

Happy bday Lucy :)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

[FAKE MODERATOR SAYS]: Let’s get back on topic folks.

Pink panties.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Is that where @queenie ‘s panties ended up?

MilkyWay's avatar

@Tropical_Willie Yep. My panties ended up with a panty thief @Symbeline

Cruiser's avatar

What is a good substitute for yarn?

erichw1504's avatar

Happy Birthday @somejellywhosebirthdayistoday_ihope.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

@y’all-Thanks for the birthday wishes:)

erichw1504's avatar

@Cruiser spaghetti.

Cruiser's avatar

@erichw1504 Cool! I think I will knit myself some boxers made of angle hair pasta!

erichw1504's avatar

@Cruiser awesome. Could I get a pair as well?

Cruiser's avatar

@erichw1504 Sure…what’s your waist size and would you prefer plain, wheat or spinach noodles?

erichw1504's avatar

@Cruiser I’m a healthy thin man. Size small with wheat, please.

Cruiser's avatar

@erichw1504 Size 46” waist double stitched coming right up!

erichw1504's avatar

@Cruiser alright, exactly what I asked for.

erichw1504's avatar

402 Payment Required

WasCy's avatar

404 Page Not Found

erichw1504's avatar

I asked this girl out, but she gave me a 411 error: Length Required.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

403 FORBIDDEN

rooeytoo's avatar

In the jungle, the mighty jungle

choreplay's avatar

The lion sleeps tonight, right on top of 409

KateTheGreat's avatar

Does anyone else do their Fluthering on the potty?

Blondesjon's avatar

I haven’t used a potty since I was a toddler.

I will sit and take a big healthy shit on a toilet while I Fluther.

choreplay's avatar

412 – Shity conversation, new topic please.

erichw1504's avatar

And the new topic is… ~drum roll~ ...argyle socks! Run with it.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Lets NOT.

erichw1504's avatar

Lame.

Blondesjon's avatar

I wiped with an argyle sock once.

it was heaven

erichw1504's avatar

@Blondesjon I could only imagine.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I imagine argyle socks would look silly with plaid pants, but we could start a new trend…

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@erichw1504 Get out. These are MY pants, you pervert.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

There goes @erichw1504 trying to get in another pair of pants. ( Someone else was already in them )

choreplay's avatar

I’ll give you sooommme chocolate, ;P

MilkyWay's avatar

MM, yes please :D

erichw1504's avatar

I’d rather have some bacon.

Blondesjon's avatar

The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright—
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.

erichw1504's avatar

This one time at math camp…

MilkyWay's avatar

You lost me at “math”...

erichw1504's avatar

This one time at meth camp…

choreplay's avatar

Oh no, no new post. Helloooo out there. Bueller, Bueller, Bueller?

(Thinks to self, maybe I should misspell something, that would generate some activity. Lol, almost misspelled “misspell”)

Bellatrix's avatar

You should go to Meta and edit @Season_of_Fall

erichw1504's avatar

Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.

Blondesjon's avatar

The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done—
“It’s very rude of him,” she said,
“To come and spoil the fun!”

Blondesjon's avatar

The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud, because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead—
There were no birds to fly.

erichw1504's avatar

There once was a man from Nantucket…

Blondesjon's avatar

The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand;
They wept like anything to see
Such quantities of sand:
“If this were only cleared away,”
They said, “it would be grand!”

choreplay's avatar

@Bellatrix, Meta and edit? Is there a place to edit inside Fluther?

Blondesjon's avatar

“If seven maids with seven mops
Swept it for half a year.
Do you suppose,” the Walrus said,
“That they could get it clear?”
“I doubt it,” said the Carpenter,
And shed a bitter tear.

erichw1504's avatar

I think this may need to go to Hijack: Part II.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

~~You can’t count past 300 ! !

Thought a touch of “flame” broiling was apropos.

erichw1504's avatar

aproporopsa

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Wasn’t Apropos a Death Eater? :P

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate has a pretty pic of herself up. Did I say that out loud.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Awwwww! How sweet!

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

have you noticed that hijack is like saying hi to someone named Jack?

Bellatrix's avatar

But who is this Jack we are all saying hi to?

MilkyWay's avatar

He’s the Jack who climbed the beanstalk, and is now trying his luck in deep sea diving.

choreplay's avatar

448,

Aethelwine's avatar

Yeah, I farted. Jealous?

Bellatrix's avatar

Lights a match.

Blondesjon's avatar

“O Oysters, come and walk with us!”
The Walrus did beseech.
“A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk,
Along the briny beach:
We cannot do with more than four,
To give a hand to each.”

choreplay's avatar

This is a test, this is only a test, this is not the real thing, and it is only a test.

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

@Bellatrix and @jailbait I think it’s Jack who turned into a jelly

augustlan's avatar

Feeeeeeed meeeeeeee.

MilkyWay's avatar

With what?

augustlan's avatar

A Milky Way? Actually, I’m more of a Snickers girl.

MilkyWay's avatar

Chuckle I’ll get you a Snickers, I’m not in a mood to be eaten :P

Bellatrix's avatar

Jack turned into a Jelly….

Are we talking wibbly wobbly jelly or jammy jelly?

My bloody dog is at the gate barking at some poor person who is choosing to walk past my gate. Or perhaps it is the cat barking…. hah to those who say cat’s are not sneaky… Somewhere there is a Chihuahua saying “what? I didn’t do nuffin”. link

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@augustlan

I’ve got a bag of Snickers right here.

Ooppsie some of them are gone.

rooeytoo's avatar

I love the word “snicker.” It brings up a mental image of someone, anyone, having a snide or devious little chuckle about something!

My favorite candy bar is called Time Out. Do you have them in USA or elsewhere? They are scrumptious!

Blondesjon's avatar

The eldest Oyster looked at him,
But never a word he said:
The eldest Oyster winked his eye,
And shook his heavy head—
Meaning to say he did not choose
To leave the oyster-bed.

MilkyWay's avatar

@rooeytoo We’ve got Time Out here :)
I’m posting this from school. I’m so bad! XD

rooeytoo's avatar

@jailbait – ahhhh good, then you know how delicious they are. I don’t remember them from when I lived in USA.

I say wag school, become an air con repairer and move to Florida.

Blondesjon's avatar

But four young Oysters hurried up,
All eager for the treat:
Their coats were brushed, their faces washed,
Their shoes were clean and neat—
And this was odd, because, you know,
They hadn’t any feet.

erichw1504's avatar

Do these pants make my butt look big?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@erichw1504 Nah, it’s your fat ass that does it.

erichw1504's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe So, THAT’S what it is! Thank you!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate!

erichw1504's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Sooo… no more choking the chicken?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Not according to Monty Python’s world! Every sperm is needed in your neighborhood!!!!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

What if your S/O chokes the chicken for you?

MilkyWay's avatar

0_0

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Wait a minute, this is strangely sexist. Our swimmers are sacred but your eggs are free range? That’s hardly fair.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Free range???? ROFLMAO!

MilkyWay's avatar

Size matters. :p

erichw1504's avatar

@jailbait No, it’s how you use it.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I can turn a phrase once in awhile.
@jailbait I’ve never heard I wish for a small one.

MilkyWay's avatar

FYI eggs are bigger than the swimmers. A lot bigger. Intimidating even ;)

erichw1504's avatar

@jailbait You would know.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@jailbait So that’s why women get pissy for those days at the end of the month?

MilkyWay's avatar

LMFAO!

Blondesjon's avatar

Four other Oysters followed them,
And yet another four;
And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more—
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore.

choreplay's avatar

@Blondesjon I believe you have created the perpetual thread. A legitimate reason to talk non sense with an end purpose. Congratulations.

Blondesjon's avatar

The Walrus and the Carpenter
Walked on a mile or so,
And then they rested on a rock
Conveniently low:
And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row.

erichw1504's avatar

I’ve got two tickets to paradise.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name.

Blondesjon's avatar

“The time has come,” the Walrus said,
“To talk of many things:
Of shoes—and ships—and sealing-wax—
Of cabbages—and kings—
And why the sea is boiling hot—
And whether pigs have wings.”

choreplay's avatar

It seems like yesterday
But it was long ago
Janey was lovely she was the queen of my nights
There in the darkness with the radio playing low
And the secrets that we shared
The mountains that we moved
Caught like a wildfire out of control
‘Til there was nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove
And I remember what she said to me
How she swore that it never would end
I remember how she held me oh so tight
Wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Whisper in the yard and turn the trees all into toys
Lay there on the ground and turn the dirt into your joy
From what I see and what I know it’s all been boring lately
So I suggest we trade a question mark into a maybe
Time your riddles right and make a point that has no sense
Make sure you’re smiling and the money has been well spent
Innocence and ignorance, it all goes hand in hand
I’m not sure I’m right but I hope you’ll understand
I hope that you are still searching for the start that has no end and all the plastic people have now become your friend
Before you start to drift and your soul begins to scream
I just wanted to tell you you’re listening to a dream.

choreplay's avatar

The dance we shared beneath the stars above

erichw1504's avatar

And I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I found out yesterday there really is a place called Bumfuck, Egypt. And the only way to get there is to go up Shit Creek.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Then would the residents of said city be called Bumfuckers?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Not sure, but I guess they’d be up a creek without a poodle.

erichw1504's avatar

Everybody <em>DANCE!</em>

Tropical_Willie's avatar

<em>DANCE!</em>

I don’t want to ! ! !

erichw1504's avatar

BUT YOU MUST!!!

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I’m not like everybody else.

erichw1504's avatar

BUT YOU ARE!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Dance or I’ll shoot off a couple of toes.

MilkyWay's avatar

I’m dancing.
But not in front of you :P
Go away.

Blondesjon's avatar

“But wait a bit,” the Oysters cried,
“Before we have our chat;
For some of us are out of breath,
And all of us are fat!”
“No hurry!” said the Carpenter.
They thanked him much for that.

choreplay's avatar

I passed the exit for Eatonsville MS, interestingly it is exit 69.

augustlan's avatar

We can dance if we want to. We can leave your friends behind.

Bellatrix's avatar

Tap dances… and slips on the timber floor…

MilkyWay's avatar

Catches @Bellatrix in arms in a heroic and corny fashion…

Bellatrix's avatar

lol phew! Ty @jailbait… saved me from a splitting experience…

Hey, have you started your dancing lessons yet?

MilkyWay's avatar

No, I can’t even walk yet.
Those will have to wait another year or so.
I’ll probably have enough money for lessons then as well.

Bellatrix's avatar

Something to look forward to :-)

Blondesjon's avatar

“A loaf of bread,” the Walrus said,
“Is what we chiefly need:
Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed—
Now if you’re ready, Oysters dear,
We can begin to feed.”

Bellatrix's avatar

Five more verses to go…

Blondesjon's avatar

“But not on us!” the Oysters cried,
Turning a little blue.
“After such kindness, that would be
A dismal thing to do!”
“The night is fine,” the Walrus said.
“Do you admire the view?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Harvestor of eyes, that’s me, and I see all there is to see.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@disenchanted_poisongirl Yes indeed. Loudest concert I ever attended. It was Rainbow as the opener.

erichw1504's avatar

Don’t fear the reaper.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@disenchanted_poisongirl Here’s the kicker. I still have the admission ticket. It cost $7.50.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@disenchanted_poisongirl Only. That doesn’t buy 2 gallons of gas today.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

“You’re not warriors. You’re pigs! You’re aaaaaaaaaall pigs! Piiiiiiiiiiiiigs!”

Name that movie!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Mary Poppins?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Hahahaha! Not even close!!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Was it The Warriors?

erichw1504's avatar

Bruce Wayne.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@disenchanted_poisongirl Ding! Ding! Ding! Have a shigar, shweethawt.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Speaking of woodcock, I saw a timberdoodle Monday.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

It was purple on Monday.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Honest to god, I saw a real woodcock on the edge of my driveway. I’ve never seen one before.

MilkyWay's avatar

WTF is a woodcock???

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

It’s an upland game bird that usually hangs out near water. It’s brown with black spots and has a really long bill.

erichw1504's avatar

It’s also what I get every morning.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@erichw1504 That’s morning wood.

MilkyWay's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Aah, thanks for telling me that :)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

The woodcock or the morning wood?

MilkyWay's avatar

Woodcock. I already knew what morning wood meant ;)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

If you put woodcock in google it’ll take you to some images. They’re a pretty bird.

MilkyWay's avatar

Chuckle.
@Adirondackwannabe Okay :)

MilkyWay's avatar

Hey, they’re so cute!

Blondesjon's avatar

“It was so kind of you to come!
And you are very nice!”
The Carpenter said nothing but
“Cut us another slice:
I wish you were not quite so deaf—
I’ve had to ask you twice!”

choreplay's avatar

Thank god that was a link to a woodcock and not a morning wood. My what a long bill he has. lol

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

It’s like a Pokemon

Blondesjon's avatar

“It seems a shame,” the Walrus said,
“To play them such a trick,
After we’ve brought them out so far,
And made them trot so quick!”
The Carpenter said nothing but
“The butter’s spread too thick!”

erichw1504's avatar

Is this thread hijacked yet? Cause I think it still needs more time.

Blondesjon's avatar

“I weep for you,” the Walrus said:
“I deeply sympathize.”
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Six Seventy Eleven.

erichw1504's avatar

Seven One Two Thousand and Eleven.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I’ll rate that a 8, Liked the beat and you could dance too it!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I think this may be the thread from hell. It’s impervious to mere mortals killing it.

MilkyWay's avatar

IT’S FRIDAY!!!!
LET’S GO KILL HER.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Did you hear the Hulu dis-connected “Facebook Connect” because it released an employee’s personal information on the web?
Here’s the info

Blondesjon's avatar

“O Oysters,” said the Carpenter,
“You’ve had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?’
But answer came there none—
And this was scarcely odd, because
They’d eaten every one.

Aethelwine's avatar

Nicotine, Valium, Vicodin, Marijuana, Ecstasy and Alcohol

rooeytoo's avatar

I like xanax myself! But only when I fly or go to the dentist.

augustlan's avatar

Sex.

Bellatrix's avatar

Raises an eyebrow @augustlan .. is that a request?

augustlan's avatar

Perhaps it’s a command. :p

Bellatrix's avatar

ooh… wonder who is going to obey… :D (Watches out for Auggie’s whip).

choreplay's avatar

569 Oh, sorry, wrong count. I think I got distracted by something @augustlan said.

Blondesjon's avatar

@jonsblond . . . C-c-c-c-c-cocaine.

MilkyWay's avatar

I’m gonna do,do,do just what the fuck came here to do,do,do.

AmWiser's avatar

The End, Fin (Mods say, leave all lurve here and post no more!..)

MilkyWay's avatar

NEVEERRRR!!!
I’m gonna hijack this thread if it’s the last thing I do!!
YABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABABADOOOOOOO

AmWiser's avatar

Ummm! Didn’t work I see. I’ll try again later:D

rooeytoo's avatar

Isn’t it strange, everytime there is a new addition to this thread, I feel the need to make another inane comment myself.

But I am going to resist this time, I will say nothing inane.

Only important stuff like….................................., I’ll get back to you later.

Blondesjon's avatar

I once saw a man swallow his own head.

It wasn’t really as cool as it sounds. Kinda gross and gave me a weird headache watching it.

Aethelwine's avatar

just 2000 more responses and Jon can beat @Astrochuck’s lead for having the most responses to a Q!

and on that note…... sex

rooeytoo's avatar

Make that 1,999.

Aethelwine's avatar

now I have a Prince song stuck in my head. Thanks @rooeytoo =)

augustlan's avatar

I bet it’s Little Red Corvette. ~

Bellatrix's avatar

Nooo, we are talking the Blondes…. I’m guessing Dirty Mind or Sexy M.F? Prior to thinking about Prince’s song, Ms Blonde’s last words were .. “and on that note…..sex”.

MilkyWay's avatar

BDSM.

choreplay's avatar

Hi @MilkyWay, nice name.

MilkyWay's avatar

:D Thanks

Aethelwine's avatar

I made an amazing strawberry blueberry lemon cheesecake, had an excellent 4th with my immediate family and am totally sun burnt.

good times, even though I’m hurting

choreplay's avatar

My wife made fried green tomatoes to go with the cheese burgers, yum!

Blondesjon's avatar

from an actual conversation, as it was told to me:

Awww for Chrissakes! Somebody came all over the fucking rabbit!

MilkyWay's avatar

586 :p

AmWiser's avatar

587 I’m playing that number in the lottery today..

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

is it a game? can I say 588?

MilkyWay's avatar

@disenchanted_poisongirl
Sure ;)
Lets see how many jellies keep this number game up, till someone comes along with something to say.

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

@MilkyWay nice :) then, 588 it is.

MilkyWay's avatar

591

MilkyWay's avatar

593 XD

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I had sex on a waterbed this weekend.

Bellatrix's avatar

594 (I am off to watch the State of Origin this evening. If you don’t know what it is, look it up. One of the world’s best football games. QUEENSLANDERRRRRRR. :D )

Tropical_Willie's avatar

597 I know, I know . . . . . .

Bellatrix's avatar

598 bugger, I got the count wrong. Oh well!!

choreplay's avatar

number five, number nine, number nine

choreplay's avatar

600 had to do it!!!!!!!

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

601

I need some more coffeeeee now

erichw1504's avatar

1202. Am I doing this right?

choreplay's avatar

noooo, lol

Bellatrix's avatar

604. We won the State or Origin!!! Darren’s last State of Origin game. And I was there. Go Queenslander. What a game. link

rooeytoo's avatar

@Bellatrix – go the maroons!!! Too bad for Thurston and the Cowboys though.

(why is your cat wearing the stars and stripes, are you an honorary yank???)

Bellatrix's avatar

Ouch, that looked very nasty. I cringed when it happened. It is apparently not as bad as it looked they are saying this morning. Let’s hope so.

I was being nice for the 4th July to the US jellies and forgot to change my fur. Should have changed to maroon yesterday!

The thing is with State of Origin (and with footy in its various codes generally in Australia), you can take your kids there, you can sit with the opposition team supporters, and there is no trouble. The worst that might happen is you get some beer spilt on you. There were over 58,000 people there last night and not a moment of trouble. We had four young blues supporters sitting with us, trying to vocally inspire their team on (it didn’t work of course and we did laugh at them a bit) but they were good humoured about what was happening on the pitch and the Qlders around them ribbed them but in a fun way. Nobody was seriously upset or getting angry about the score. It’s a good thing.

Suncorp stadium is amazing too in terms of getting people in and out. We had to wait about five minutes and then we were on a bus on the way home again.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Put your cursor on his face.

rooeytoo's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate – that is so funny!!!

@Bellatrix – yeah those bloody yanks are always having riots in the stands, not safe to go to the superbowl or anything there. And the bloody canadians and their hockey matches, they are unbelievable, not safe to go there with kids. I love Australia, nice and safe here!

MilkyWay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate That made me jump. I’m so not joking. Jeez.

choreplay's avatar

That reminds me of sticky baby, here Use the cursor to shake the baby around the screen. (must have sound)

Blondesjon's avatar

When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me . . .

rooeytoo's avatar

speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree,
there will be an answer, let it be.
For though they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see,
there will be an answer. let it be.

Let it be, let it be, .....

And when the night is cloudy, there is still a light, that shines on me,
shine until tomorrow, let it be.
I wake up to the sound of music, mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

I heard the Beatles in their first USA concert tour, Washington DC would have been l964 I think. A friend had a very influential father so we had front row seats. This was right after someone said the boys loved jelly beans. So we were pelted with jelly beans thrown by the rows behind us, all night long!

Bellatrix's avatar

Well that is something to brag about Ms @rooeytoo. How cool (except the jelly beans). Do you still have the program or anything?

Blondesjon's avatar

@rooeytoo . . . So you dig a pony?

rooeytoo's avatar

Nope no souvenirs except the memories, after all that was a few years, husbands, moves and continents ago! heheheh

It was a wild time to be living in DC though, Vietnam peace protests, hanging with Bill Clinton in Georgetown, Kennedy assassination and the accompanying ceremonies. It was all pretty exciting stuff.

Bellatrix's avatar

I bet it was! You should write a book. :-)

erichw1504's avatar

Derp.

MilkyWay's avatar

Burp.

erichw1504's avatar

Slurp.

MilkyWay's avatar

Turp.

choreplay's avatar

FFFFFRTT, EXCUSE ME!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Meep meep!

One o these days, ima get that damned road runner…

erichw1504's avatar

It’s the itchy and scratchy shooooooooowww!

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

What’s new Scooby Doooooooooooooooooooooooo??

erichw1504's avatar

Where everybody knows your naaAAAaaaame.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

AAAAAAAAAAAADRIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

erichw1504's avatar

Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Jelly-air

MilkyWay's avatar

And then you turned gangsta.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

H
I
J
A
C
K
E
D

MilkyWay's avatar

N
O
T
.
A
N
Y
M
O
R
E.

erichw1504's avatar

In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground where I spent most of my days
Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool
And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys, they were up to no good
Started making trouble in my neighbourhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
And said “You’re moving with your auntie and uncle in Jelly-air”

Blondesjon's avatar

Has anybody seen Fat Carlton hosting a horrible show on GSN?

erichw1504's avatar

I whistled for a cab and when it came near the
License plate said “fresh” and had a dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was rare
But I thought nah, forget it, yo homes to Jelly-air!

MilkyWay's avatar

It’s Friday. I’m bored.

erichw1504's avatar

I pulled up to a house about seven or eight
And I yelled to the cabby “Yo, homes smell you later!”
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the prince of Jelly-air

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

pink paisley rats

Blondesjon's avatar

Be purple, obsequious, and clairvoyant.

erichw1504's avatar

Be pink, observant, and charismatic.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

…......................................................................................H
..........................................................................................I
.
.........................................................................................J
.........................................................................................A
.........................................................................................C
.........................................................................................K
.........................................................................................E
.........................................................................................D

erichw1504's avatar

H!j@cK3D

MilkyWay's avatar

…...............................................................................................................................N
..................................................................................................................................0
..................................................................................................................................T
.
..................................................................................................................................@
...................................................................................................................................n
...................................................................................................................................Y
..................................................................................................................................m
...................................................................................................................................0
...................................................................................................................................r
...................................................................................................................................E

erichw1504's avatar

R3j@cK3D

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

HfIuJcAkCiKnEgD

choreplay's avatar

644 gasp! Read between the lines letters.

MilkyWay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate FUCKING HIJACKED

choreplay's avatar

:) Nice ;)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

<throws a pie, straight into the grinning puss of @erichw1504>

choreplay's avatar

Is it just me or is the internet slow tonight. STOP, don’t answer that.

Bellatrix's avatar

Tick tock, tick tock…............tick….......tock…...........

choreplay's avatar

…...............................................................................tick

Bellatrix's avatar

….........tock

choreplay's avatar

….............................................................................................................Tick ..
............................................................................................................................
...........................................................................Tock

Bellatrix's avatar

Ding dong ding dongggg
Ding dong ding dong
Ding dong ding dongggg

Dong (It’s 1pm)

(Actually I lied. It’s 1.11 but I had to fix the printer)

MilkyWay's avatar

I hate going to weddings.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’d just like to repeat- waterbed sex. It rocks. :P

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Have ever given someone a wedgie?

Bellatrix's avatar

No. Have you?

rooeytoo's avatar

Have you noticed that every single time there is a new response to this thread, there is one for the Will you tell me something great that happened today, Part….

I find that sort of spooky!

Bellatrix's avatar

That is a bit odd. Fluther gremlins?

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate, would you like to explain that in a little more detail ;)

rooeytoo's avatar

Shoot, these last 2 responses made a liar out of me! It’s too late to edit, so just ignore my rambling please (and don’t try to blame it on drunken fluthering, I haven’t had a drink in over 20 years!)

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

Went back home again
This sucks gotta pack up and leave again lala lala

(I don’t really think it sucks, but there’s that song stuck in my head)

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate – reasked that as a question all by itself.

Blondesjon's avatar

Fuck the Sheriff.

I shot John Wayne.

MilkyWay's avatar

I killed Justin Beiber :D
.
.
.
.
In my dreams.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Season_of_Fall It does rock. Literally. =0) I need to get me a waterbed.

erichw1504's avatar

hyjakkt

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate wouldn’t you have to match the rythm of the waves, or maybe every fourth thrust would have to be timed to a wave. Just guessing as I have not had the opportunity. By the way vicks is been replaced by toothpaste, that way its edible and doesn’t limit multiple activities. Thinks to self, I should not have another glass of wine

Blondesjon's avatar

Fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way.

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

There’s blood in the streets, it’s up to my ankles
Blood in the streets, it’s up to my knee
Blood in the streets in the town of Chicago
Blood on the rise, it’s following me

erichw1504's avatar

!dEkCaJiH!

MilkyWay's avatar

I am going to die. I know it.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@MilkyWay I’m a Texas gal and we have the death penalty here. If someone kills you, I will kill them back. You can just come to me in a dream and tell me who to go after, lol. =0)

choreplay's avatar

Queenie and Willworkforchocolate, what on earth are you two talking about. Maybe we need to go to some private place and talk.

Blondesjon's avatar

When in doubt, I whip it out.
I got me a rock n’ roll band . . .

erichw1504's avatar

When in doubt, pinky out.
I’m drinking tea…

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Blondesjon Now I got that song going through my brain.

Blondesjon's avatar

I’m sorry @Adirondackwannabe but it is a Free For All.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Blondesjon Could be worse. Could be Cat Scratch Fever. Or Stormtrooping or Stranglehold.

Blondesjon's avatar

You know, now that you bring it up, I can make a pussy purr with the stroke of my hand.

erichw1504's avatar

Ich bin ein Liebes-Maschine

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Komm her meine shatz mit deine hosen in deine hand.

erichw1504's avatar

Das klingt einfach schlicht falsch.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Das boot.

erichw1504's avatar

Du hast.

MilkyWay's avatar

Shut up.

AmWiser's avatar

Banana Split.

Bellatrix's avatar

New Zealand Jaffa orange and dark chocolate ice cream….................oh my…...........

erichw1504's avatar

Du hast mich.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Do you have michelob light?

Blondesjon's avatar

All right, everybody be cool, this is a robbery!

Any of you fucking pricks move, and I’ll execute every motherfucking last one of ya!

erichw1504's avatar

Meh. Sounds boring.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Blondesjon Bite me. I have bulletproof underwear.

Blondesjon's avatar

@erichw1504 & @Adirondackwannabe sigh.learn your quotes children. maybe this is a better clue.

Hello, little man. Boy, I sure heard a bunch about you. See, I was a good friend of your dad’s. We were in that Hanoi pit of hell together for over five years. Hopefully, you’ll never have to experience this yourself, but when two men are in a situation like me and your dad were, for as long as we were, you take on certain responsibilities of the other. If it had been me who had not made it, Major Coolidge would be talking right now to my son Jim. But the way it turned out is I’m talking to you, Butch. I got something for ya. [Holds up watch] This watch I got here was first purchased by your great-grandfather during the first world war. It was bought in a little general store in Knoxville, Tennessee, made by the first company to ever make wrist watches. Up until then, people just carried pocket watches. It was bought by Private Doughboy Ryan Coolidge the day he set sail for Paris. This was your great-grandfather’s war watch, and he wore it every day he was in the war. Then when he had done his duty, he went home to your great-grandmother, took the watch off and put it in an old coffee can. And in that can it stayed ‘til your granddad Dane Coolidge was called upon by his country to go overseas and fight the Germans once again. This time they called it World War Two. Your great-grandfather gave this watch to your granddad for good luck. Unfortunately, Dane’s luck wasn’t as good as his old man’s. Dane was a Marine and he was killed along with all the other Marines at the battle of Wake Island. Your granddad was facing death, and he knew it. None of those boys had any illusions about ever leaving that island alive. So three days before the Japanese took the island, your granddad asked a gunner on an Air Force transport named Winocki, a man he had never met before in his life, to deliver to his infant son, who he had never seen in the flesh, his gold watch. Three days later, your granddad was dead. But Winocki kept his word. After the war was over, he paid a visit to your grandmother, delivering to your infant father, his Dad’s gold watch. This watch. This watch was on your Daddy’s wrist when he was shot down over Hanoi. He was captured and put in a Vietnamese prison camp. He knew if the gooks ever saw the watch that it’d be confiscated; taken away. The way your Dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He’d be damned if any slopes were gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy’s birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something. His ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. And then he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.

MilkyWay's avatar

Yo! Anyone know where the toilets are? I really have to go…

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@MilkyWay Down the hall to the left.

erichw1504's avatar

@MilkyWay They’re closed for maintenance though. You’ll have to go up to the 17th floor and go past the statue of me holding a sword, then take a right.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Can someone help me connect my Commodore 64 to my 55 inch Panasonic plasma, it would be waaaay cool?

choreplay's avatar

700!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

^.^ You’re not wearing any underwear under that shirt are you?

Bellatrix's avatar

@choreplay where has the topless ironing man gone!!! Bring him back!!!

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate do you realize that ironing board doesn’t have any legs, guess what’s holding it up, lol

@Bellatrix he’s back in our secret room boudoir

Blondesjon's avatar

We’ve done the impossible and that makes us mighty.

rooeytoo's avatar

@Blondesjon – no offense, heheheh, but I became bored with this question quite a while ago. I swear I have clicked the stop following button on at least 3, perhaps more occasions and it won’t stop! Everytime someone adds a new response I am notified! How do you do that?????

Bellatrix's avatar

Possession…

Blondesjon's avatar

@rooeytoo . . .^^re: the mighty part

MilkyWay's avatar

I’m hot.

choreplay's avatar

By how much 95 degress F? Is this thread considered Hi Jacked yet? 709

AmWiser's avatar

Whew! That was fun.XD
Now I need a glass of wine.
el extremo!
La fine!
The End!!!!

choreplay's avatar

Anyone want to run to 7 11 for a slurpee?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Mmmmmmmmmm….... sluuuuuurpeeeeeeeeeeeee.

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

“If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don’t feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth.”

Blondesjon's avatar

david copperfield made the statue of liberty disappear

Aethelwine's avatar

hangover sex is fucking awesome

Blondesjon's avatar

no. i am awesome at it.

erichw1504's avatar

does this text make my butt look big?

Tropical_Willie's avatar

You bet yah “Crisco in the Can”

choreplay's avatar

Is it obnoxious to want to be the last post on this thread?

choreplay's avatar

Thanks

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@choreplay Your welcome :)

Tropical_Willie's avatar

“Does anyone know what time it is?”

disenchanted_poisongirl's avatar

I. Love. ICE CREAM.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Glad you changed the avatar. My wacking off was affecting my eyesight.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Oh my goodness… lmfao! Hopefully you won’t feel the need to whack off to the avatar of my nuclear cat.

Bellatrix's avatar

I love your cat… (although I thought it could be a ferret).

choreplay's avatar

Are you all still following this thread?!?!?!?! Go away!

Bellatrix's avatar

No. We will not. Get your shirt off. I demand naked ironing man comes back.

choreplay's avatar

You didn’t comment on shirtless beach guy.

Bellatrix's avatar

I didn’t see him!!! Why did I not see him??? Far out… dipped out there didn’t I.

choreplay's avatar

There you go.

Bellatrix's avatar

Yeah… he is okay… I prefer naked ironing man. Possibly because he is naked and IRONING!! Got to love a man that irons….

choreplay's avatar

No he’s not naked, he’s wearing jeans. Wasn’t it enough to post him on your page. I adore you @Bellatrix but the guy without the pants is my pick. I will say my wife is with you on shirtless guy.

Bellatrix's avatar

Sighs… I don’t get to see him as often on my page. I fluther more than facebook. I love your wife. She has taste :D

choreplay's avatar

She does, doesn’t she. I’m a lucky man.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Today is laundry day in the Chocolate household. You should come over and do my laundry….. naked. Bring your tie if you must.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Depends where you want me to wear the tie.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

<cough cough> I would never be that lewd, sir! <cough>

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Ya, I bet you’d like the tie, the collar and leash use would be fun.

MilkyWay's avatar

Jeez.
I’ll just pretend I didn’t see that convo between Wise moon and Momma.

choreplay's avatar

Sorry, back to Hijacking the thread. Mine!

MilkyWay's avatar

Haven’t you got chores to do? This thread’s MINE. :P

choreplay's avatar

Mine! I’m gonna tell Mom!

Blondesjon's avatar

uh, actually it’s mine. duh.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

The thread that never dies.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Wanna bet?

/kills everyone

choreplay's avatar

ahchoo!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Holy shit! How did you survive the anthrax?

Blondesjon's avatar

Because I’m the man. I’m the man. I’m so bad I should be in detention. I’m the man.

choreplay's avatar

I have been slowly building my tolerance. Haha. :)>

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

And did you also build an intolerance for Iocane? It’s odorless, tasteless, disolves instantly and is one of the most deadly poisons known to man. And I just slipped some into your drink.

choreplay's avatar

You better stop it, I mean it! Anybody want a peanut?

Bellatrix's avatar

No. Fancy some chocolate though. Might have to raid @WillWorkForChocolate‘s pantry.

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I know death is on the line but your not Sicilian.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@choreplay Because iocane comes from Australia, as everyone knows. And Australia is entirely peopled with criminals, and criminals are used to having people not trust them, as you are not trusted by me, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.

erichw1504's avatar

Boobs.

MilkyWay's avatar

Moobs.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

more Boobs please.

MilkyWay's avatar

XD
Lips.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I love lips, eyes, and boobs.

MilkyWay's avatar

Chuckle
Eyelashes.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

XD. Unibrows.

Blondesjon's avatar

Do you think Shari Lewis ever gave anyone a tuggy with Lamb Chop?

MilkyWay's avatar

@Blondesjon I think so :P
Tongue.

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Why does it not surprise me that we can quote that together.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@choreplay Because we are both made of awesome.

Aethelwine's avatar

My husband tried to shove a peanut butter cookie up my nose tonight when I was trying to eat a taco.

no joke

choreplay's avatar

@jonsblond better a peanut butter cookie than lima beans.

@WillWorkForChocolate awwww, that’s sweet, like chocolate, yum. ;)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Still looking for boobs.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

High Jacques.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@choreplay Today I’d settle for any ones I can get. Chocolate took her’s out of her avatar, which is ok because my palm was getting hairy and my eyesight was getting worse.

choreplay's avatar

Oh Chocolate puts those up every Wednesday. It’s called boob wednesday. She encourages us to all put up similar photos.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

And yet no one ever does. I’m a Boob Wednesday failure. :*(

//( o Y o )\\

MilkyWay's avatar

Aw, hey. I promise to put up a silly avatar every wedneday ;)

erichw1504's avatar

(.)(.)

The itty bitty titty committie.

choreplay's avatar

No no @WillWorkForChocolate I’ve seen the cleavage you post, you far from a boob failure. lol

Dutchess_III's avatar

Let’s get this conversation back on topic people. I believe we were talking about the uncomfortable evils of thongs.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

WEDGIE—- > ( \|/ )

choreplay's avatar

The other day I found dark chocolate with a dash of sea salt for my wife, can you say periodic male salvation (P.M.S).

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Tropical_Willie Egggggg—zactly_!!!!

Blondesjon's avatar

15 year old disappointed wedding hookers

Dutchess_III's avatar

With spiders in their litter box.

Blondesjon's avatar

And conservative, Christian, socialist, pro-abortion, feminist, homosexual, pro-life, atheist cats.

Dutchess_III's avatar

And especially republican cats, as they doth ponder the meaning of “normal”...

Blondesjon's avatar

Especially, especially if said cats are named Barack Beck Olbermann Palin Hannity Limbaugh Bachman Madow Scarborough Stewart Obama.

Dutchess_III's avatar

And, having said that, it’s time someone called SRS and animal control on @Tropical_Willie and his 11 house cats!

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@Dutchess_III Don’t have 11 cats…....... and it was 27 inside and out. We lived close to a farm a lot of people DROPPED their unwanted cats in the front yard.

Blondesjon's avatar

@Tropical_Willie . . . Admitting that you have a problem is the first step toward getting well.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I don’t have a PROBLEM ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I have always been purple.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I like cheese.

erichw1504's avatar

Did you know that 100 people die from choking on a pen every year?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

How many choke while doing a Penny?

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Have you heard about @Coloma‘s new cat? And where the sundress got…......

Blondesjon's avatar

Do you think Obamacare is why it’s been so hot this summer?

erichw1504's avatar

No, this whole heat wave is a hoax.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Tell that to Texas.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

What did you say? I’m sorry, I was passed out from heat stroke.

erichw1504's avatar

It’s 147 degrees here. Minus 66.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Right now, it’s 99, but the high of 105 should hit in a few hours.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@choreplay I know! Send me a fan, shit!

choreplay's avatar

No no, we don’t want the shit to hit the fan, so will only send the fan and hold the shit. Ok?

Dutchess_III's avatar

How did this turn into a discussion of fans of hot, purple cat shit? You purples are crazy.

Aethelwine's avatar

Halloween countdown: 73 days, 5 hours, 36 minutes

choreplay's avatar

@jonsblond, ya, how much time now?

Aethelwine's avatar

72 days, 20 hours, 27 minutes.

choreplay's avatar

Are we there yet? :)>

erichw1504's avatar

Friday countdown: 0 days, -10 hours, -3 minutes

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Butterscotch.

erichw1504's avatar

Pumpernickle.

erichw1504's avatar

Naan.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Whole wheat.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

IT’S FRIDAY, FRIDAY, GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY! EVERYBODY’S LOOKIN’ FORWARD TO THE WEEEEEEEEEKEND!

So… as a summary, it’s Friday. I have a poor memory, so I don’t remember who originally posted that damn video on Fluther, but whoever it was- damn you, damn you, damn you!!!!!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

It wasn’t me.

erichw1504's avatar

Half wheat.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

French Bread

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Cheese balls.

erichw1504's avatar

Cheese Nips

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Toasted cheese.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Cheese doodles.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Bull-milk. Blame Blueroses.

erichw1504's avatar

Milk Doodles

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Bull-milk doodles

erichw1504's avatar

Bull-cheese Milk Doodles.

choreplay's avatar

Holly shirt, it is Friday, how the hell did that happen, I thought it was Thursday!!!! Weeeeee

On a different note I found Dark Chocolate with sea salt at Target this week and bought it for my wife. Can you say Periodic Male Salvation (P.M.S).

Blondesjon's avatar

You son of a bitch! You moved the cemetery, but you left the bodies, didn’t you? You son of a bitch, you left the bodies and you only moved the headstones! You-only-moved-the-headstones! Why? Why?

Dutchess_III's avatar

MUWHAAAAAAAA!!!

Bellatrix's avatar

Is very worried…

choreplay's avatar

aboouut?????

Bellatrix's avatar

Bread, cheese, maniacal laughter… makes me nervous…

choreplay's avatar

Maniacal: affected with or suggestive of madness. Hi Bellatrix, we haven’t had a chance to talk in a while. Here kitty cat. Don’t mind me I’ve had a little too much to drink. mwahahaha

Dutchess_III's avatar

You guys know NOTHING about pepperoni, do you. No…don’t respond. It is quite obvious.

Bellatrix's avatar

lol@Choreplay .. I was thinking that myself. Well pass the wine. The sun is now over the yardarm… it’s all good.

Pepperoni… is Clive coming @Dutchess_III?

Dutchess_III's avatar

‘ventually @Bellatrix. sorry I scared you with my maniacal laughter… :(

Blondesjon's avatar

Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who’s the slimy little communist shit, twinkle-toed cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh? The fairy fucking godmother said it. Out-fucking-standing! I will PT you all until you fucking die! I’ll PT you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk!

choreplay's avatar

I missed something somewhere, I’m lost, how did we get on food. Lets go with my reliable answer: 847

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Frikkin’ elf nuts!

Aethelwine's avatar

I say peaches you say what?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I still like the elf nuts.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I think would rather have BIT-O-HONEY®.

erichw1504's avatar

The only way to succeed is to _____.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Get a pair of elf nuts.

erichw1504's avatar

You can find elf nuts in the country of _____.

Blondesjon's avatar

That’s right, Mr. Martini. There is an Easter Bunny.

erichw1504's avatar

This one time at space camp…

choreplay's avatar

Ok, I can do this, think random food, ammmmm, ahhhhh, Honey

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Can we eat elf nuts?

erichw1504's avatar

Only honey elf nuts.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

No, you can not. They’re not for food, they’re just frikkin’ elf nuts!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

You haven’t heard of Rocky Mountian Oysters?

erichw1504's avatar

<html>
Hello world!
</html>

choreplay's avatar

:) lol

Blondesjon's avatar

Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

bunnygrl's avatar

@Tropical_Willie I’m still here! <hugs> just not been around for a while. I’m sorry everyone, been in the midst of what my gp calls a “flare” (I have RA and FM) and its taken me all my energies to not lose my job ie: just turn up and get through my shifts without crying.

I’m now officially on holiday from work though for two weeks, so hope to take things easy enough to recover a little (enough to start feeling as near human as I can get) and be here again :-) Hope everyone is well honeys, <throws mountains of squeezy huggles> xx

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@bunnygrl
{{{{{ HUGS }}}}} . . . . back.

bunnygrl's avatar

throws more squeezy hugs for @Tropical_Willie :-) thank you for missing me.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@bunnygrl I’m sorry you’ve been feeling shitty poorly. :(

And before @Adirondackwannabe can say anything, I’m trying to watch my mouth a little more these days, okay? Sheesh! Everybody’s a critic! Son of a bitch biscuit eater!!!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@bunnygrl Here’s another round of hugs for you. I hope your docs get a handle on those.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe What, no silly retort about the fruitless attempt at watching my mouth? heeheehee

bunnygrl's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate there is absolutely nothing wrong with the way you express yourself, don’t change even a little, you’re great just the way you are <covers @WillWorkForChocolate with squeezy hugs>
ps: son of a biscuit eater?? LOL LOL brilliant!! I have to use that one, LOVE it!!! xx

@Adirondackwannabe <huggles> thank you honey, but arthritis has been kicking my butt for maybe 12 or 13 years, and mostly I’m fine, i manage, but every now and again it gets too much, then I just have to try to ride out the storm till it burns itself out again for a while. It’s not fun by any means but I still count my blessings, I see people so much worse than I am whenever I’m at my hospital appointments, so I am grateful that i’m able to cope most of the time. As I said, I count my blessings, like having lovely people like you on here who’ll listen to me moaning :-) love and warmest squeezy huggles honey xx

erichw1504's avatar

I’m a renegade
I’m a rebel
Don’t worry about me.

Blondesjon's avatar

Almira Gulch, just because you own half the county doesn’t mean that you have the power to run the rest of us. For twenty-three years, I’ve been dying to tell you what I thought of you! And now… well, being a Christian woman, I can’t say it!

MilkyWay's avatar

Going down the most recent responses, I see food.
And shit.

erichw1504's avatar

I have nothing witty to say right now.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Pay attention you squirrels! This is important! How many of you have these words memorized:

” Not only do I hijack your thread by not talking about hijacking as thou hath inquired pon’, but I do indeed hihjacketh thy peaceful nights!

So, what creeps you guys out?”

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Frikkin elf nuts!

Dutchess_III's avatar

All elves are nuts.

choreplay's avatar

I feel like we’re going in circles here.

Aethelwine's avatar

I love light switch

choreplay's avatar

@choreplay moves to the music. groovin!!! Nice fro

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Got to see this at least through 900 answers.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

900 – 10 = ?

Tropical_Willie's avatar

No, the answer is forty-two.

erichw1504's avatar

@Tropical_Willie of course, how could I have made that mistake?

Blondesjon's avatar

The crickets and the rust-beetles scuttled among the nettles of the sage thicket. “Vámonos, amigos,” he whispered, and threw the busted leather flintcraw over the loose weave of the saddlecock. And they rode on in the friscalating dusklight.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

The wonderful thing about Tiggers, is Tiggers are wonderful things!
Their tops are made out o’ rubber, their bottoms are made out o’ springs!
They’re bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy, fun fun fun fun fun!
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers is I’m the only one!
I’m the only one!

choreplay's avatar

“You can’t help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn’t spell it right; but spelling isn’t everything. There are days when spelling Tuesday simply doesn’t count.”

erichw1504's avatar

What about Wendsday?

choreplay's avatar

Nice spelling, you get one star for effort. :)

Dutchess_III's avatar

Which star? MJ? J-Lo? Will Smith? Specifics, please.

Bellatrix's avatar

I think you get a young man called “Clive”. He is a star in the pizza industry :D

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I had sex with Johnny Depp last night. Again. He’s amazing.

Dutchess_III's avatar

You are SO lying @WillWorkForChocolate! I know you are because…Clyde went missing last night. Was the light on when you were doing what you thought you were doing with who you thought was Johnny Depp?

Dutchess_III's avatar

heh heh!

erichw1504's avatar

907.0

choreplay's avatar

Aw, can’t sneek one past you!!!

erichw1504's avatar

908 and two halves.

choreplay's avatar

:)> @erichw1504 wouldn’t it be obnoxious if we just started to alternated counts till it hit 1000. 909

erichw1504's avatar

@choreplay you realize mine is actualy 909, since I said 908 and two halves.

9/11 (O.O)

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Let’s get us off 911 fast.

erichw1504's avatar

A job well done @Adirondackwannabe !

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Frikkin elf nuts.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I wonder what elf pussy tastes like?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Wanna go on a hot date with my warcraft avatar?? She’s really sexy with long pointy ears and turquoise hair. :P

Blondesjon's avatar

Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.

choreplay's avatar

918, thanks for the cleavage @WillWorkForChocolate. It is boob Wed after all.

Blondesjon's avatar

You’re no daisy! You’re no daisy at all. Poor soul, you were just too high strung.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’m your huckleberry.

Blondesjon's avatar

I will NOT calm down! This is the second time I’ve been hit with a severed head and I DON’T LIKE IT!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Anybody want a peanut?

Blondesjon's avatar

Ah. Well… I attended Julliard… I’m a graduate of the Harvard business school. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that. I’ve seen the EXORCIST ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT… NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU’RE TALKING TO A DEAD GUY… NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK? You think I’m qualified?

choreplay's avatar

You better stop it, I mean it!

erichw1504's avatar

Give me a Great Answer if your left hand is touching your head as you’re reading this.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

WRONG. Your ears you keep and I’ll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, “Dear God! What is that thing,” will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.

choreplay's avatar

I think you’re bluffing.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate That sounds more like marriage.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@choreplay It’s possible, pig, I might be bluffing. Then again, perhaps I have the strength to stand, after all.

erichw1504's avatar

Give me a Great Answer if your left hand is NOT touching your head as you’re reading this.

Blondesjon's avatar

Sicilians are great liars. The best in the world. I’m Sicilian. My father was the world heavy-weight champion of Sicilian liars. From growing up with him I learned the pantomime. There are seventeen different things a guy can do when he lies to give himself away. A guys got seventeen pantomimes. A woman’s got twenty, but a guy’s got seventeen… but, if you know them, like you know your own face, they beat lie detectors all to hell. Now, what we got here is a little game of show and tell. You don’t wanna show me nothin’, but you’re tellin me everything. I know you know where they are, so tell me before I do some damage you won’t walk away from.

choreplay's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate isn’t this the part where I turn and run like coward.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Blondesjon Gimmie my head back!! NOW!

Aethelwine's avatar

My parents wanted to move me into high school out of the sixth grade, but we decided to chuck the idea because I’d have trouble making friends, blah, blah, blah. Now blah, blah, blah is all I ever do. I use my grand IQ to decide what color lip gloss to wear in the morning and how to hit three keggers before curfew…

Dutchess_III's avatar

@jonsblond tell @Blondesjon to gimme my head back, please.

Aethelwine's avatar

Dammit, I forgot to buy coffee.

Don’t hate me @Blondesjon. :(

Dutchess_III's avatar

Will you mods PLEASE change that first response? I have to stare at it for 5 minutes until this thread opens up.

And go by @jonsblond some coffee and find my head in their house while you’re at it.

choreplay's avatar

938 of 1001

Aethelwine's avatar

You be cool, Little Mama. I’ll be back before too long.

choreplay's avatar

He’s super bad. He’s outta sight.

Blondesjon's avatar

Shh. Mama, you’re gonna wake up the rest of the bitches.

Dutchess_III's avatar

942.5?

choreplay's avatar

No no, 944 of 1001

choreplay's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Very good, try another

erichw1504's avatar

Nine 4 Eight

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Do you think we’ll make 1000 with this?

erichw1504's avatar

1000 what, bananas?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

No, no, no…. not bananas. Monkeys.

Aethelwine's avatar

Once a carnie, always a carnie.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Carne asada?

Blondesjon's avatar

Erik Estrada?

erichw1504's avatar

OK, I’ve got Michelangelo. Who’s gonna use the others so we can assemble our team?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Dutchess_III No, it’s 666. Get it right.

choreplay's avatar

958 of 1001

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Has anyone made veggie tacos?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

No, but I once made spaghetti tacos to please my daughters. They got the idea from a TV show called iCarly. Those were some nasty tacos…

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

With sauce?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Yeah, you make spaghetti like normal, with meat and sauce and noodles. Then you make a garnish with tomatoes, shredded lettuce and grated cheese. Heat the taco shells, fill with spaghetti and top with garnish. The characters on the show love those tacos, but eating them for real…. <shudder>

Tropical_Willie's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate TGIW – - – - – - Thank God it’s Wednesday ! !

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Yeah, somehow the combo doesn’t quite work. You bite through the taco and hit the spaghetti and ewww.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Yeah, it was pretty gross. Would have been better just eating the shell filled with the garnish; the flavor combination of taco shell and spaghetti didn’t mix well.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Where are the wildfires in relation to you?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

About 2–3 hours away. I’m not good with measuring in miles, lol.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Yikes, that’s way too close. I’ll say a little prayer for you guys.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Awww, how sweet! Thanks! I don’t think it will get too close, though. The area around Possum Kingdom Lake (that’s one of the places that has just burned up) went up in smoke before and it didn’t get near us.

What sucks, though, is that Camp Grady Spruce is up in smoke and that’s where my daughter’s 5th grade class was supposed to go this year. It’s a really big deal for the 5th grade school year, but it looks like they might have to select another location. :(

erichw1504's avatar

Nine hundred and seventy. Only thirty more to go…

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I find the number of homes gone hard to believe. We’ve got plenty of water here, wish we could share.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Yeah, it’s awful. Y’all have too much rain and we haven’t had any. Ugh.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Kind of ironic in the most sucky of ways. We have houses obliterated by water and yours are obliterated by fire.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Yep. Some people think it’s the “wrath of God” lol. /facepalm

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

You just have to smack their heads together. It’s just shit for luck. Now we’ve got the remains of Lee headed our way. Oh boy.

choreplay's avatar

976 of 10001

Aethelwine's avatar

My girlfriend still doesn’t know why her sweaters are always stretched out.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Has @WillWorkForChocolate been wearing them?

erichw1504's avatar

980 out of 100000.1

Blondesjon's avatar

Every day it becomes more clear that I don’t belong here. I’m certain now that Clay and Gemma are together. They barely try to hide it from me. Gemma hates my apathy. She hates all of me. Her chill is terrifying. I know my days are numbered Mo, and when these letters stop you can be certain my death will come at the hands of my wife and best friend. At least my sweet Thomas will never suffer my life. I miss him so much. I only pray that Jackson finds a different path. He already reminds me so much of myself.

Aethelwine's avatar

Smoking marijuana, eating Cheese Doodles, and masturbating do not constitute ‘plans’ in my book!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Some people are completely fucking insane.

Just thought I’d throw that out there…

Aethelwine's avatar

Better call Saul!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Where is insane located? Is she a good fuck?

Blondesjon's avatar

New Zealand, that’s where they made Lord of the Rings. I say we just move there, yo, and, I mean, you can do your art. Right? Like, you can paint the local castles and shit, and I can be a bush pilot.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Keep your pilot away from my bush.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

How is a woman like a plane? They both have a cockpit.

Aethelwine's avatar

What if this is like math or algebra, and you add plus-douchebag to a minus-douchebag, then you get, like, zero douchebags

erichw1504's avatar

990 folks. We’re getting close. Please keep seat belt fashioned at all times. Tray must be in upright position and seats back. Enjoy the ride!