I would never wear pants again. Ever.
I would exercise in dresses. I would clean in dresses. I would have a closet full of dresses and skirts.
I would tell my friend to stop stalking her ex, screaming at her ex, throwing things at her ex. And I would tie her to the passenger seat of my car to make sure she stopped.
I would bring my pets with me everywhere.
I would eat my usual massive amounts of food in front of guys. (Apparently it’s off putting to see a 125 lb girl chow through soup, salad, multiple bread sticks, appetizers, her entree and yours, and dessert. My friends sure think so, but I don’t care what they think. I’m pretty sure they’re just jealous.)