I think we’ve been having a good discussion about the real issues here. I don’t think it is a good idea to bring in speculation about the motives or veracity of the OP. The issue is what matters and I think it’s a very important issue that gets at some very fuzzy areas of our social and legal mores.
What is the age of responsibility? What are the responsibilities that adults have towards youngsters who are technically children but act like they are older? Or try to be taken as adults? What if a child uses a fake ID to get into a club once, before they know what it is like, and then, after they find out, does it again? Does that mean they are responsible for themselves the second time and deserve whatever they get? Do they lose protection because they are like children, and make the same mistake twice, if, indeed, it is a mistake?
Children who want to grow up fast do it largely because they think that being an adult is more fun. You get to do more fun stuff like drink and drive and have sex when you are an adult. Most kids who think like this, don’t see the responsibility side of being an adult. They also don’t see the consequence side. Like getting hurt. Or getting pregnant. Or being abused emotionally.
So should they have to bear the consequences of their mistakes like an adult? And on the other side, should adults have to bear the consequences of their mistakes in getting inappropriate attention?
Many people say that if an underage girl seduces an older man, it is his fault. He had no business being anywhere near a girl that much younger. It doesn’t matter if she represents herself as old enough or looks old enough. He should have asked for an ID. Oh great. She got in on a fake ID, so is she going to use her real ID now? How absurd is that?
What about this? Aren’t the parents still responsible? So if the underage girl sneaks out and gets pregnant from an older guy, shouldn’t the parents get prosecuted for statutory rape? Or at the very least bad parenting? If the girl isn’t responsible, then who is? The man? But he didn’t know. The parents? But she escaped them without their permission.
My feelings are complicated. I have a 15 year old girl. She’s never dated and she is not interested in growing up. She sees the responsibilities that adults have and she’s glad to be take care of as long as possible. Her friends drink and party and do drugs and she doesn’t approve. She doesn’t think it’s wise. I don’t see her sneaking out to go to a club any time before she’s in college.
If she did, I think she knows what can happen. I don’t think she would trust older guys. She’d hang with her girlfriends and drink only whatever she brought with her.
If somehow she did get involved with an older man, I would assume some nefarious actions had occurred. It wouldn’t be like her. If she did something like that, it would be under the influence of some drug or another.
It reminds me of discussions we’ve had about rape. If the girl is under the influence of some drug, can she consent to sex? Most people here who answered the question said no. Yet, she chose to imbibe, knowing the effect it would have on her. In fact, she imbibed because of the effect it would have on her. How far can we go to protect her? Any her. Any age? If they put themselves in the way of harm, do they lose their right to protection?
If you deliberately put yourself in the way of harm, do you lose your rights to protection? If you go to the bad neighborhood, did you bring the mugging on you? If you drink to excess, did you bring the rape on you? If you sneak out to a club when you are underage, do you bring the statutory rape on you?
Officially, we say we don’t blame the victim, and yet, I hear people all the time saying they brought it on themselves. They should have known better. Should they have? And if they should have known better, does that mean the deserve what they get?