Yes, I definitely think it’s true. But who would want to hold onto someone if they wanted to leave anyways?
In the case of a romantic tie, I have always felt that jealousy is so pointless when it comes to fighting to keep someone. After all, who wants to be with someone who doesn’t care to be with them?
There are different aspects to the idea of setting someone free.
As some people have touched on, one aspect is the idea of setting them free by saying goodbye. But in many, if not most, cases the idea of setting them free has more to do with letting them be themselves and follow their own path even if it conflicts with what we want or need from them. Even if it means we disagree with their choices or wish they would consider our feelings a bit more, we need to let them be free.
If you love someone you want what is best for them, but who is to say that what they choose for themselves is best? You don’t know, you only need to respect that that is what their heart and mind are drawing them to. We may not think it’s best and want to intervene. In some cases If we love them and know them well we may think rightly or wrongly that we see they are making a mistake. Sometimes, loving them, respecting their choices, oddly enough,means we have to let them make that mistake. We can counsel them but ultimately it is their choice.
I like the second part of the saying because it carries a positive message-
“If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.”
But now that I think about it, this is the crux of the issue! They are never “ours” to own and keep. They are their own person. Our love needs to be a gift, freely given without any demand of being loved in return.