First, I would appoint my friend Nick as co-leader of the world. We have had plans for running the world together for decades and are more than ready to implement them on a moment’s notice. I just don’t exactly remember what all those plans were, off the top of my head. I will give Nick a call tomorrow and get back to all of you. So, maybe not a moment’s notice, give us 24 hours, O.K.? and the two of us will whip this world into shape in no time!
Free taco Tuesdays. Veggie or meat.
And as much as I like it, I would do away with “business attire” as a form of something to conduct business in…Wear whatever the fuck you want. Except I would order folks be shot on site if out in their pajamas or Ugg Boots. I don’t care if you are sick.
Public pajamas kill the romance and the lack of romance has destroyed the world. It’s time to get back to some flipping romance.
Also, if your pants are found, being worn around your thighs (with a belt) and you talk with your cell phone on speaker anywhere in public….Your lover will be fined, not you but your girl or man will be fined. The sum of $2500.00
And…..hmmmm.
NO TIME SEASONAL TIME CHANGES EVER!
Can I make all of these things “firsts?”
I’d like to buy the world a Coke and teach it to sing in perfect harmony. It’s the real thing. I would also outfit everybody with a 12 pack of Charmain toilet tissue so they could enjoy their “go” for at least a little while.