I waited until I was on “boot leave” or otherwise known as the leave period after boot camp to have sex for the first time. Doing sexual things started around 16 with my first girlfriend.
I don’t remember why, but at the age of 11 or 12 I had this fear that my Parents were going to teach me about sex by “showing me” how sex worked by doing it themselves.
So you can imagine how relieved I was for Dad to grab the Illustrated instructional book that they kept hidden, under their bed (which I had already been looking at for 6 months secretly). Dad turned to pictures of female genitalia, and showed me. It was kind of awkward and uncomfortable. Then we never talked about it again.
I try to keep an open line of communication with my 12 year old son about sex. Saying that it is going to probably be a driving force as he gets older. That I am an expert on sex (as far as he knows) and that I would be happy to answer any questions he has without jumping to conclusions.
I plan to speak with him concerning casual sex in the near future. Just because he has sex with someone doesn’t mean he has to marry them. That is the ideal place for sex to blossom; in a relationship with his soul mate, but not to rush into anything on sex’s account.
If it isn’t apparent by the intent I have already spelled out…I am a bit naive about the ‘right way’ to talk about this, because my parent’s method wasn’t comfortable or helpful at all.
Secretly (until this moment), to me the youth of a person when they first have sex is an indication of how healthy a relationship with their parents is, so I use that theory as leverage to be the best parent I can be.