Hmmm. It’s really hard for me to separate what are social norms and what are remnants of sexism. (After all, women only got to vote in 1920, we have a presidential candidate who believes that women belong in the home and that birth control is a force for evil, a major party wants to control a woman’s decision about her own body and health care, and legislation just got passed in Wisconsin that makes it harder for a woman to demand equal pay for equal work because Money Is More Important For Men)
I’ll admit to being a bit extra prickly about how I’m supposed to look and behave just because of my gender just now. But it’s hard not to look around and see business women in ridiculously high heels and think “sexism” (for example). Okay, so there’s nothing wrong with a woman wanting to look her best. But just who decided that “best” is teetering around on unhealthy shoes so your butt looks good? I like looking at guy’s butts – why don’t they wear heels to accentuate them?
Do men make women do these things to be “attractive”? Nope, absolutely not. But I would posit that that’s where many of our current styles originated. Being perceived as “sexy”, a good catch, a potential mate. And if it’s rarely questioned, it rarely changes. So why not ask “Why?”
Why do I have to buy fake eyelashes, mascara, that stuff that makes eyelashes grow longer but may cause blindness (I don’t actually know that much about it) to be attractive? Shouldn’t being healthy and fit be enough?
Why do I have to wear heals that damage the bones in my feet to be attractive? Shouldn’t moving athletically and gracefully be preferred?
Why not ask? Why not wonder?