I also like mindfulness. Through it, I have learned how to let go of those kinds of thoughts. Also, having an increasingly bad memory is real helpful, because I no longer have those memories of old shames. I can’t say I cultivated this technique deliberately, but perhaps I have.
In any case, I practice letting go of thoughts that aren’t helpful. It started by forgiving myself for being unable to let go of those thoughts and allowing myself to think about them as much as I wanted, since I had no control over them. Somehow, this self-forgiveness and giving up of trying to stop things gave me the power to let go. Not instantly, but after a while.
I think feeling good about myself also helped. Not that I know how that happened. It kinda just did. Maybe it was the meds. Or maybe it was getting positive feedback from others.
Oh yes. Positive feedback. That helped me immensely! Finding out that people liked some of the things I wrote was amazing! It became harder and harder to convince myself that I was a no-good, useless doofus. People actually took me seriously at times. Slowly, that feedback helped me feel better about myself, which enabled me to stop bothering about the guilt and shame so much.
SImilarly, a different philosophy of life helped. I discovered that my old philosophy was essentially causing me to beat myself up every day. For who? For what? I gradually realized that I didn’t have to save the world. I didn’t have to be perfect. I didn’t have to be anything. I could let it all go and just do a little bit—whatever was necessary in my daily life. That really helped me let go of the weight of self-expectations that was impossible to achieve.
One thing that doesn’t work for me is affirmations. They always make me feel worse. They don’t work the way they are supposed to, which makes me feel like I am doing something wrong, which makes me feel bad about myself, which makes me feel worse. But I have permission not to do them, and that makes me feel good.