The older I grow, the less I enjoy messing with my brain. If I drink more than one glass of wine, I pay for it. I’m such a lightweight. And forget pot. I need a day or two to recover if I get high.
Part of this has to do with other meds I’m taking that make me super susceptible to alcohol, and probably other mind bending drugs. Part of it has to do with mental illness. I’m already super messed up without inducing any mind-altering substance (yeah, like you couldn’t tell). I don’t need to push any further in that direction.
I know we’re not talking about LSD, but I have a cousin who used to do it regularly back in the 60’s and she got really manic and then depressed and was unable to care for herself for years as a result. I don’t need that. Besides which, my stomach is also super-sensitive. I can spin around once and get nauseous.
To tell the truth, I have never really been able to identify with people who enjoyed using these substances. Things are already so intense for me. I can’t imagine making it even more so, voluntarily. It happens, occasionally, and that’s enough to nearly destroy my life. Why would I do this voluntarily?
Of course, others must be different, but it’s hard to imagine how you can handle it. I mean, I can’t talk, think, or do anything on drugs. It makes me nauseous, usually. How do you manage it?