Social Question

Carly's avatar

To you, what is the most attractive quality a person can have?

Asked by Carly (4555points) June 18th, 2012
49 responses
“Great Question” (4points)

curious to know where people stand on this question. I’m not just talking about people you’re romantically attracted to, but if your answer would be different from those you are and those you aren’t, why so?

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Fly's avatar


syz's avatar


syz (35695points)“Great Answer” (1points)
thorninmud's avatar

Not sure what to call it… “openness”, maybe? You know how you can see that some people are thoroughly engaged with the world, attentive to it, receptive? There’s an approachability that goes along with that, too; this isn’t someone who is armored with lots of barriers or out to get something.

Coloma's avatar

Intelligence, honesty and yes, openness.
Most unattractive, sneaky, passive aggressive and manipulative. Gah…if ever I could kill someone it would be a passive aggressive. lol

bkcunningham's avatar

Empathy and a sense of fun.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

By far intelligence

zenvelo's avatar

I’m like @thorninmud – being present and engaged with life. Also; being aware and responsible for one’s self, and not responsible or judgmental about others.

jca's avatar

Too many to name. I like a humble person. Someone can be smart but if they’re conceited, it ruins it. If they’re great looking and they know it, it ruins it. I like an intelligent person, one who can engage even on a basic level about most any topic. One who can say they’ve read this book or that magazine article, or can tell me something interesting I didn’t know already. I like honesty. I like someone fun. I like funny people. I dislike anxious people who are nervous wrecks and worried all the time.

I am not talking romantic “like,” I am talking just someone that I would want to be friends with, any gender.

jca (36059points)“Great Answer” (6points)
tups's avatar

Open eyes.

linguaphile's avatar

Willingness to accept that more than one perspective exists, even if they don’t agree with it. Flexibility in reasoning. And another echo of agreement with @thorninmud

Coloma's avatar

Yes, you guys have amended my brief sharing, I agree with everyones expanded versions. :-)
I’d also add a great sense of humor, low neuroticism and low analness factor.
The other day I was at a persons house admiring some bumble bees and honey bees on their lavender bushes. They are an extremely anal type and they spotted a tiny little trail of black ants in their driveway and immediately went and grabbed the insecticide sprayer.

I tried to discourage them from spraying the poison near the bees, explained how important bees are and how we are losing out natural honey bees due to the longterm effects of systemic pesticides and they completely ignored me and sprayed the poison anyway, right UNDER the bush where the poor little bees were doing their thing.

Really, really pissed me off!

bookish1's avatar

Kindness! Can’t believe I’m the first one to say this….

Coloma's avatar

@bookish1 Maybe it’s because that should go without saying! :-)
Nobody would ever say I like unkind people. lol

bookish1's avatar

@Coloma: But some people don’t want/seek kind people for friends or partners! Like attracts like, and the inverse.

Coloma's avatar

@bookish1 True, that.

jca's avatar

@Coloma: I put that I dislike anxious people that are nervous wrecks. Sounds like your friend there with the insect spray.

jca (36059points)“Great Answer” (1points)
MilkyWay's avatar

An open mind.
Sense of humour.
In that order.

athenasgriffin's avatar

Self-assurance. Not ego, not really confidence. Just a general quality of knowing and accepting oneself.

ucme's avatar


SpatzieLover's avatar

Openness. I regularly engage with people that are open. It really all moves on from there. If someone is closed off or guarded, I probably won’t continue even considering a conversation.

From there, honesty, integrity, and warmness would be my needs to continue engaging with the individual.

Kardamom's avatar


wundayatta's avatar

Themselves-ness. It’s nice if people are kind, but to me what is most interesting about a person is that they are fully and unapologetically themselves. They are not trying to be someone else. They’ve given up on that. They have accepted who they are and no longer edit it; no longer pull punches; and just revel in being who they are.

marinelife's avatar

I can’t separate: brains and a sense of humor.

erichw1504's avatar

Brain says: “A great personality.”
Nether region says: “A great pair of boobies.”

Shippy's avatar

So odd I was thinking of this today, I think the most beautiful quality a person can have, or qualities, is a kind loving heart, and a forgiving heart. I do awful things at times, and say rotten things and people forgive me. I on the other hand, sulk and get mad for days, so that quality I find beautiful in another person.

bookish1's avatar

@Shippy: Forgiveness is a good one. That’s something I struggle with and really admire in other people as well!

whiteliondreams's avatar

Sincerity. No trait is worth having if it isn’t accompanied by sincerity.

Neizvestnaya's avatar


Coloma's avatar

@jca Yes, I just don’t understand people that have zero respect for nature and don’t give a flying f—k about other creatures and their right to life.

Sunny2's avatar

Relaxed friendliness, intelligence and a sense of humor. Oops. That’s three. Should I have put them in 3 different answers? To me they are of equal importance.

Paradox25's avatar

A person who doesn’t play the game, and is happy with being themselves rather than trying to impress other people. Being personable is a big one as well to me.

Coloma's avatar

I had a great time at my yard sale the other day and observed the different personalities that were showing up. I was totally “on”, just being my natural, humorous and outgoing self.
Had some great interactions. I adore playful, humorous, spontaneous people! :-)
One couple bought 2 cat beds I had and the ” tunnel of fun” my description of the item, a crinkly, fold out tube.

We played off each other for about 5 minutes, I was cracking them up and what was really cool is they were BOTH of a similar energy. Unusual to double your pleasure and rare to come across couples with the same energies.
It is always so refreshing to interact with funny, spontaneous and good humored witty peeps! Those sort of encounters keep me smiling for hours.

augustlan's avatar

[mod says] This is our Question of the Day!

15acrabm's avatar

Probably the people that aren’t afraid to show how they are really feeling. I’m not talking about over dramatic people, but the ones that don’t constantly hide behind this mask of “im too cool to actually have feeling.”

Bill1939's avatar


lifeflame's avatar

life purpose.
a sense of who they are, and a sense that they are, exactly where they need to be; doing exactly what they were meant to be doing.

Blondesjon's avatar

Being able to tolerate me for extended periods of time.

Blackberry's avatar

It’s nearly impossible to pick one thing. It doesn’t matter how smart a woman is, if she doesn’t have the body to match my preference, it’s not going to work. This applies to everyone. You need more than one criteria to be met.

Fly's avatar

I didn’t realize it until now, but I think that my personal definition of intelligence includes being open-minded. I didn’t even think to separate the two for the purposes of this question, but seeing people listing open-mindedness as a separate quality made me realize that I think of them as a package deal. Just me?

Coloma's avatar

@Fly I would agree that open minded is synonymous with intelligence. Cookies & milk. Good point.

trailsillustrated's avatar

Attitude. I know and have known some people in very adverse circumstances, or just in general might have very awful jobs but they have great attitudes about it. Interested in everything and everyone. ( In a good way, not stickybeaks). Funny and smiling.

Coloma's avatar

@trailsillustrated Excellent observation! Yep, that’s my personality, no matter what is going on with me on a personal level I am always able to put it aside and be friendly and cheerful, sincerely. Attitude is everything!

ZEPHYRA's avatar


mattbrowne's avatar

Being curious.

bookish1's avatar

@trailsillustrated: stickybeaks? O_o

mazingerz88's avatar

Warm personality

trailsillustrated's avatar

@bookish1 ooh! I meant..nosy or busybodies? sorry..

bookish1's avatar

@trailsillustrated : Gotcha, thanks. It’s quit evocative! Is that an Australian thing? I’ve never heard it before :)

Coloma's avatar

Haha, yes, I like “stickybeak”...funny!

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