I have mixed bipolar. Everything that was said up above about memory loss, manic one minute, depressed the next, roller coaster ride, I have felt that all. I think meds make me fuzzy. Sometimes I can’t even find a a particular word for like 15 minutes :/
I was just telling my new favorite jellie ;) not long ago that my bipolar is locked up in a rubix cube in my brain caused by a foreign toxin in my body that toxin comes in medication form. The biology of my body invades that rubix cube which has been locked by the foreign body aka the medication and tries to unlock the code leaving me in a zombie like state.
The result? I’m not myself. Who the hell am I? I don’t know anymore.
I agree with @wundayatta. I want to stop taking my meds. Because I want to become smart again. I used to be the sharpest nail in the box. I was proudly full of life, sleepless, horny all the time, mostly highs, with some episodes of depression. Now I’m dull, sexless, emotionless and exhausted. I used to be a vampire but now I am a zombie. I don’t even think anything I say makes sense anymore. BRAINS, BRAINS!!!