A few tips from my experience that you may find of use…, listen, hug them don’t pretend to understand because unless you really have lived it no one could. Platitudes are not needed. be there now and be there in the future, it gets worse before it gets better. Don’t be strong, be real, cry with them love them and love their baby, don’t have a time line it takes as long as it takes.
Accept the grief it comes from the deep well of loving, painful as it is it is able to begin the healing. Don’t try to fill the quiet moments with words it’s not necessary.
Never say the child will be better off,or is in a better place, or can be replaced etc etc I’m sure you wouldn’t but people say some silly things without thinking. Plant a memorial for the baby. My friend’s child died on good friday some years ago and she fills her house with Easter daisies every year to as a tribute to him. It is truly beautiful.
Be practical, just not too many lasagnes, something else and heaps of it, organise a dinner roster, or fill there freezer with meals, make sure they have fresh milk and bread, go over and mow the lawn, run the vac over the floor, clean the bathroom etc. don’t offer just do it.
What ever you do don’t go over and be waited on, it’s not what they need, you are not a guest in this case you are a support.
Best wishes to you in this devastating time. My heart truly goes out to you, I can’t begin to imagine how hard something like this is.