You don’t really specify WHERE exactly the two of you would be living together. Do you mean you’d like her to move in to your place or vice-versa ? Or would you both search for another place not previously occupied by either of you ?
If you’re expecting her to move in with you, I’d certainly understand her hesitation since she’d be the one suddenly homeless if the relationship doesn’t last.
Deciding to live with someone is easily the equivalent of marriage in terms of the impact it has on each person life. They’re essentially sacrificing their independence and freedom (financial as well as emotional )
So, if you’re not willing to commit to her in marriage, I don’t think you have a leg to stand on. Why should she give up her independence and her living space without a marriage commitment. I certainly wouldn’t.
I think she’s acting very wisely.
Instead being all hurt and stuff, you should do some serious and honest soul searching about why you’re unwilling to commit to marriage.
If you’re just not ready for that yet, that’s fine.
But don’t be expecting her to make more of a commitment than she’s ready for.