@josie That made me LOL.
@zenvelo I don’t know any woman who did it for those reasons, but there is some truth in what your saying, and that probably is the case some of the time. My SIL was the one to leave and finally filed a few years later, because she wanted it done, and needed custody of the kids for legal matters. I think she liked the idea of court ordered child support, but he lived out of the country and nothing was enforceable.
One friend of mine left because she was miserable, a little afraid of her husband, and the guy never worked a full time job. She finally filed and asked for the divorce, in that order. She finally did it because I, and a few others, told her it will be better while her son is very young and if she waited longer he would be entitled to her social security. She pays him child support and wholly resents it.
Another friend of mine left when her husband was drugging and cheating and lying. She didn’t even realize the dire financial situation he had gotten them into. She finally filed. He was ordered to pay child support. I think he paid a few hundred for a few months. At one point she had him arrested, but in the end she couldn’t keep doing that. He barely paid a small fraction of child support over the years. If it added up to $3k I would be surprised. The kids were about 3 and 7 when she left him.
The only man I know who filed was when my girlfriend left her husband and finally after years he filed the papers. They were both good people, she still worked with him on and off. They just had really grown apart.
Another friend filed when her husband wouldn’t help her quit drinking. That wasn’t the only thing wrong though.
Pretty much in my circles about 80% of the time the women filed for divorce.