My late brother. I had come “home” for my father’s funeral. When he found out that my then bride-to-be was black, he was sure I was making the biggest mistake of my life. Not that he had anything against my then-fiancee personally, but he thought that we would face nothing but trouble, and that I should consider that. I knew his feelings were heartfelt, and he did not want to see me suffer, but I was still upset with him.
We did not speak for several years. The fact that we lived 1300 miles apart did not help matters.
Eight years later, shortly after my mother’s funeral, he called and asked to speak to my wife. He then proceeded to apologize to her, and told her that he thought she was the best thing that had ever happened in my life. The wife and I passed the phone backk and forth several times during that conversation, and we all had a deeply felt, tearful reconciliation.
We saw him several years later, when we were in town for a family reunion. He was wheelchair-bound, having experienced several strokes, complications from frostbite-related amputations. I almost didn’t recognize him when I first saw him.
I went to visit him at his home, and took my six-month old daughter (who is obviously black) to see him. He was bedridden, and asked me to place her next to him in the bed. He played with her, as best he was able, and she laughed and giggled in response. It was beautiful and moving.
Well, that was the last time I saw him. He passed later that year. It’s been 15 years, and I still miss the hell out of my big brother.
@JackofHearts This is been an unexpected catharsis for me. Thanks for the Q!