Social Question

janbb's avatar

Was leaving no tip the right response?

Asked by janbb (62877points) August 25th, 2015
32 responses
“Great Question” (5points)

“Belmar, New Jersey: Waitress Says Diners Left Her No Tip and ‘LOL’ Note on Receipt
Jess Jones, who works at D’Jais Bar & Grill, wrote on Facebook that a table of eight with a $112 bill wrote “LOL” next to the tip line with the comment “1 hour for food.”

Was this the waitperson’s fault? if not, what should the diners have done to register their displeasure?

Some restaurants are now ending tipping and adding a mandatory fee to the bill so that they can pay their employees (kitchen help too) a better wage. Is this a fairer plan?

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Answers

zenvelo's avatar

Here is what I did last Saturday in a similar situation:

At a sushi bar before a movie, we ordered in plenty of time, received our miso soup and edamame promptly, and it wasn’t too long before the tempura shrimp roll came. But after waiting half an hour for the Sushi Combo plate, we realized we would be late for the movie, and no one had been by for twenty minutes to even check on us. So I walked over to the cashier and asked for our check.

And then the combo plate appeared, but it was too late. So I tipped 10% on the final amount, instead of my usual 20% which would have been on a much higher tab. But the cashier and the wait staff knew it was because they had been so slow.

Writing “LOL” on the tip line is asinine and insulting. A comment on how slow the restaurant is would be okay by me, but they should have tipped her five or ten dollars.

DoNotKnow's avatar

Of course it’s not her fault. In fact, the whole tipping system for waitstaff is horrible. What kind of reasons have I heard for not tipping well?

- Food wasn’t good.
– It was too crowded.
– It took too long to get my food.
– The special request I had made wasn’t followed.

But in all of these cases, a case can be made that it’s not the server’s fault. In fact, even poor service may not be the server’s fault. What if the restaurant has too few servers working on a busy night? It means that the servers will inevitably provide less-than-ideal service, and will end up with a poor tip.

Servers should be paid – and paid well – rather than work for tips. If a restaurant can’t afford to offer compelling meals and pay its staff decently, then it doesn’t deserve to be a restaurant. If we’re already paying for the price of the food + 20% tip, why not just make the price of the food reflect the price of getting that food to your table? Nobody looks at a $30 entree and thinks, wow, if this were $36 I wouldn’t buy it. We all know what the final cost of the meal will really be. And if paying staff decently means that you need to raise prices even more, then do it.

I don’t think I have ever tipped less than 20%.

ibstubro's avatar

Yes, I think a reduced/no tip is appropriate.
A good server will not let a table sit for 10 minutes without checking in. If you’ve stopped 6–8 times at a table without food arriving, there is an obvious problem, and it’s the server’s responsibility to check it out, as they are the liaison between the diners and the kitchen. They can explain the problem, offer an appetizer while they wait, etc.
This very thing happened to us about 6 weeks ago, and we were sitting at a table where we could see our food waiting on the counter in the kitchen. The table to our left and right had come in after us and were eating, because they had a different waiter. Finally, the other waiter brought our food out. We left no tip at the table, but as the bill was settled, I pressed a bill into the other waiter’s hand and thanked him. We had talked to the manager, even, and he basically shrugged.

We’ve had some really crappy food, and waited really long times to eat and still tipped really well. If someone has to get up and hunt waitstaff down, the tip is going to suffer.

dxs's avatar

This is the waitress’s words from a report by USAToday: “Even though they did wait an hour to eat, they remained satisfied with filled drinks and proper notice that the kitchen was a bit busier than normal.”

I think most people just don’t understand what it’s like to be a server. They only see it from their perspective and it just seems like it can’t possibly be any other way. I’ve never been a server but I work fast food and it’s a similar situation.
To hell with tipping. Assholes take advantage of it.

dxs (15160points)“Great Answer” (5points)
Buttonstc's avatar

No. Leaving no tip at all is a absolutely ridiculous and writing LOL is just rubbing salt in the wound.

If I ever have any kind of problem with waitstsff, I will leave a reduced tip to get the message across. But I will also make sure that I communicate this to management.

But if there’s a problem with food quality or how it’s prepared, a waitress has no control over that so I’ll still tip my usual 20+ % amount. And I’ll make sure to male my dissatisfaction with the food known to management.

However, I agree fully with the idea of just abolishing the tip system, charge what’s necessary and pay all staff a living wage.

But regardlessof what problems you have with either food or service, if you don’t make this clear to managent, how can you ever expect anything to improve? They can’t improve a situation that they don’t know exists.

Darth_Algar's avatar

There’s only been one time when I did not leave a tip, and I made note of the reason why on the bill. The food was fine, and even the service, in terms of speediness, was fine, but the waitresses’ demeanor was bordering on insulting. I don’t suspect she lasted too long in the food service industry.

Strauss's avatar

One time my wife and I took a friend-couple out for dinner, our treat. We suggested they leave the tip. One of the couple took a napkin and wrote on it: “Look both ways before crossing the street!”.

I thought she was joking, but she was serious. We then insisted that they leave a good tip!

elbanditoroso's avatar

I’m going to take a less popular stance here. [Note that I am not condoning what the guests did. But I see their point.]

You’re at a restaurant and you wait an hour for your food. Where is the manager in all this? There comes a time when the manager should have been visiting each table and apologizing and bringing something (free appetizer, drink, whatever) to the tables affected.

The guests are expected to pay the menu price for the food, no matter how long they wait. Restaurants don’t give discounts for slow service. The only variable cost – honestly, the only way to show your displeasure – is to reduce the tip – because the menu price is fixed.

As the guest, NOT leaving a tip was the only recourse they had. Now, you can argue that they should have left 10% or 5% or something in between as opposed to 0% – but that’s just a matter of degree. The fact is that the server always gets screwed – that’s how America operates its restaurants.

So my conclusions are:

- the restaurant’s manager did not do his job – at all.
– the server assumed everything was fine, when it was not
– the guests were rude (the LOL was over the top) but justified in a reduced or non-existent tip

If there were a better way to show displeasure at a restaurant, then I’d be all in favor if it. But until there is such a way, this is what happens.,

rojo's avatar

@elbanditoroso
Eliminate tipping, pay a fair wage to all employees, price meals accordingly.

rojo's avatar

How do they do it in more civilized countries such as those in Europe?

DoNotKnow's avatar

@elbanditoroso: “If there were a better way to show displeasure at a restaurant, then I’d be all in favor if it. But until there is such a way, this is what happens.”

But not paying the server in no way expresses your displeasure with the restaurant. It just means that someone isn’t getting paid for their work. You could have just kicked a puppy after you left the restaurant for an equally-effective tactic.

Do you write Yelp reviews (or another site)? Do you contact restaurants and their owners directly after you have eaten there. These seem to be more effective ways of expressing your opinions of the restaurant.

Inara27's avatar

@rojo, they pay their waitstaff, and all the staff a proper living wage with no need for tipping. On top of that, the social system includes good health care. If you wish to acknowledge a very good waiter, you can leave a Euro or two as a tolken, but it is just best to thank them and the management if you receive great service.

rojo's avatar

Thank you @Inara27. Is that the experience of others as well?

janbb's avatar

@rojo My experience is the same as @Inara27‘s .

jca's avatar

I agree with @ibstubro and @elbanditoroso. Management and/or the server should have stopped by the table with apologies, an explanation and offer of something while they waited.

If servers received the same compensation for doing a bad job as well as a good job, what’s the incentive for giving better service?

jca (36062points)“Great Answer” (2points)
DoNotKnow's avatar

@jca: “If servers received the same compensation for doing a bad job as well as a good job, what’s the incentive for giving better service?”

Keeping your job, which is well-paid since we’ve abandoned the tip system.

Since a server’s job performance is not within control of the server, in what way possible is it fair to penalize the server? And more to the point – why would we take a job in which a person has the least control over their individual performance and make their livelihood dependent on the whims of the public’s perception of them? And in what remote way does this have anything to do with the restaurant itself?

Let’s me put the question back to those who support servers working for tips: what other jobs should this system be applied to? Cashiers? The people who bag your groceries? What about the assistants who work in the doctor’s office, managing appointments and payments?

I might be open to a persuasive argument that proposes that CEOs work for tips. But servers? No.

jca's avatar

Some things are out of the server’s control, some things are not.

In the example of the food taking too long, it’s unclear in the OP’s example whether the server let the patrons know, but she should have. She or the manager should have communicated with them.

jca (36062points)“Great Answer” (1points)
JLeslie's avatar

Did the server acknowledge the long wait? Come to the table and apologize and let the customers know how much longer it will be? Make sure drink glasses are full? Even better did the manager come buy and apologize for the kitchen being so slow.

The waitperson does hold some responsibility for being the liaison between the kitchen and customer.

However, zero tip is completely unacceptable! 10% is the absolute lowest I would too and it would really have to be a waitperson screw up.

Usually, I’ll still tip at least 15% and them make a point to tell the manager how bad my overall experience was in detail if I care to give them the reward of my feedback. I seriously mean feedback, not complaining.

ibstubro's avatar

I call bullshit on the server’s job performance not being within control of the server.

I’ve worked in a lot of restaurant kitchens and that server that let you languish for an hour is just as annoying on the other end. When they pick up the food, they ‘remember’ that that 15-minutes-to-prepare dish was supposed to be ‘no onions’.
“Can you just get me another one? No onions?”
Mistakenly feeds her ‘lunch portion’ 2-top the dinners meant for another waitresses’ dinner-and-drinks 8-top.
On and on.

A great waitress will walk into the kitchen, rip the chef a new asshole, and be appreciated for it. And if later, she admits to making an error that needs fixed? If the chef is a good one, he’ll move heaven and earth to accommodate.

There is a symbiosis between the kitchen staff and wait staff at a good restaurant that should be rewarded with a good tip. Why would a great waiter depend on a crappy kitchen for a good percentage of their wages? Conversely, the kitchen can, if need be, deprive a crappy waiter of living wage.

The tip system, like it or not, tends to support a healthy restaurant. Food is old school. Reward quality service/food.

ibstubro's avatar

Finally, it occurs to me that @DoNotKnow and I are talking about 2 different things.

I’m talking about a full service, locally owned, full-service restaurant (my experience).

If @DoNotKnow is talking about quasi-restaurant chains like Applebee’s and Ruby Tuesdays, I agree, they should pay a basic wage for all, across the board.

If you like the server, as said above, leave a Euro dollar or two.

DoNotKnow's avatar

@ibstubro: “Finally, it occurs to me that @DoNotKnow and I are talking about 2 different things.

I’m talking about a full service, locally owned, full-service restaurant (my experience).”

No. That’s what I am taking about as well.

@ibstubro: “If @DoNotKnow is talking about quasi-restaurant chains like Applebee’s and Ruby Tuesdays, I agree, they should pay a basic wage for all, across the board.”

I don’t eat at that these types of places, but I am glad that we can at least agree about this.

Regarding the real restaurants and servers living on tips – do you wish that other jobs worked this way? As a kitchen worker, I am assuming that you were paid hourly?

But yes, I don’t find anything fair about servers’ incomes being dependent upon a number of factors – many of which are way beyond their control, including the whims of the customer and whether or not they liked the food. Apply this compensation logic to other professions and it would seem bizarre.

JLeslie's avatar

I don’t see any difference between a chain restaurant and a local restaurant regarding waiters. If it’s full service, it’s full service.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

We have a totally different tipping culture here, but the kitchen taking a long time to produce a meal is not the wait staff’s fault. As long as she kept them informed, served them drinks and was attentive, she should not be punished through the withholding of a tip. I’d prefer to tip the wait staff and leave a review on Tripadvisor that says the kitchen was slow in producing the meal.

ibstubro's avatar

Server’s incomes are dependent upon one factor – their choice of profession.

That said I don’t think chain restaurants with more than, say, 5–6 outlets should be able to skirt the minimum wage laws. If you visit these places you’re not seeking an exceptional experience and chance are, you’re not going to get one, unless that exception is poor.
I think there is still value in the old system on the local level, where the small restaurant owner has little to compete with beyond quality of food and service.

Tip the back of the house.

Sonic is a restaurant defies all logic.
Golden Corral Server wages mirror federal minimum wages for tipped employees, which blows my mind. My one experience with the Corral, the “server” was a detriment. I finally bussed the used plates off the table and refilled the drinks myself.

elbanditoroso's avatar

@ibstubro – my local Sonics (there are two within 5 miles) are disappointing. Food is good, but the servers no longer roller skate. That was ⅔ of the reason I went there.

Bring back the roller skate!

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

This is a case of “He Said/She Said”. USA Today interviewed the server for her point-of-view. The article doesn’t mention granting the same reporting service to the customer. Here is the article in case you didn’t it when @dxs shared it. If you had been that customer, would you think it ethical that this article was written without your side of the story?

If I found the right restaurant, here are its reviews on TripAdvisor. There are more votes for “Terrible” than even “Average”. It’s an ocean shore bar, nightclub and restaurant that caters to seasonal vacationers. The server is a university student working there during her summer months off in order to earn beer pocket money and get a tan.

There are four parties at fault here:
– The customer for the rude remark left on the receipt.
– The server for not taking control of the situation being the liaison between the customer and the kitchen staff, and even the manager.
– The manager whose responsibility is to manage.
USA Today for posting such a potentially sensational story without proper research.

So was the waitperson at fault? It’s hard to say based upon the facts available (the receipt), but my assumption is that she is partially responsible or at least the catalyst. In the bigger picture, it is more likely that the manager is at fault. It depends upon how much customer service training was received before the server was tasked to serve real customers, and specifically the type that frequent the establishment during summer.

As for whether it is more fair to add a mandatory service charge to a restaurant tab, that seems to be a different discussion. My vote would be for the US to ease out of the obligatory tipping culture, pay servers and back-of-the house employees fairly based upon a variety of equal and fair factors. If a customer wants to tip beyond that, it is up to the customer and should never be expected by the employee.

rojo's avatar

Back in my day we would have had the manager horsewhipped.

Strauss's avatar

@rojo a real whipper-snapper, eh?

ibstubro's avatar

Honestly, folks, how can the definition of a tipped employee be receiving $1 or less per day in tips?

Okay, this question is social, so I’m going to maybe (hopefully) take it in a new direction.

Can you provide a common English translation of this quote, or provide hands-on experience with it:
If an employee’s tips combined with the employer’s direct wages of at least $2.13 an hour do not equal the federal minimum hourly wage, the employer must make up the difference.

Are servers getting minimum wage, or no?
If no, how is the law skirted?

Maybe I should have asked a new question?

Strauss's avatar

@ibstubro It’s been like that for at least 40 years. Back then I was waiting tables at a Denny’s while going to college. At that time a $50 shift was a good shift, because we under-reported tips for taxes, but still took home well over the minimum wage at the time.

ibstubro's avatar

Yes, @DoNotKnow, I got that. I had the same document.

I’m asking about the law I quoted, it’s practicality and enforcement.

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