I have a son who is an addict (along with some other serious issues). I’ve tried many times to ‘help’ him.
This includes giving him money monthly to get by. It’s such a long story, but I have found that all my so-called help is of no help at all.
He is in South Africa, so for example, I gave him a few thousand for a tent and some spending money at a time where I felt he really needed it. He was virtually homeless.
By the way, he was virtually homeless I know this for a fact. However, the photographs on his Facebook saw him having what I’d call a ‘blast’ with a girl he hooked up with who had money.
The money I had sent him, now became small and he used it to buy drugs. This is how I enabled him to continue purchasing drugs/alcohol.
People would write to me telling me he had stolen from them, they wanted to call the cops. I told my son and warned him to stay away, I therefore, enabled him to stay out of jail and also continue to disregard people’s rights and probably told him it’s okay to steal because I had his back. So to speak, since I do not obviously condone stealing.
The list is endless and the years are also endless, it’s been a long haul at some 20 years of his issues. He is disabled though, since deep down he is healthy, strong and very appealing to people as he also has sociopathic tendencies, however, many sociopaths do very well in life. However, despite his strengths, he is disabled by his addictions and lies. His disability has nothing to do with me. He is disabled through bad choices and bad behaviors. I try and help him because he is disabled. I have realized that I can’t anymore because I am enabling his bad choices and bad behaviors.