My autocorrect has truly gone haywire. Gawd, I don’t even know how exactly my post above was supposed to be worded.
@jca That’s what I call a huge miscommunication. She read all into you not wanting to bother to exchange gifts as though you were passive aggressively telling her you don’t consider her a good friend anymore. If you told me you didn’t want to exchange gifts I’d say “sounds good.” Lol. You weren’t being passive aggressive, rather you were simply answering the question directly to make your life easier and hopefully hers too. She should not have asked if she didn’t want an answer.
@BellaB If you had not bothered to get her a gift the spiral might have never started. I get it though. I would have most likely done the same as you. Although, I have to say, once in a while when I do buy a gift for someone who I know probably has no idea I’m going to give them something, I certainly do not expect a gift in return. I don’t say to them I’m bringing them a gift. Maybe people think that’s a nice thing to do? To give fair warning?
I’m not totally altruistic and sugar and sweet though. When it comes to my husband’s family they use their gift giving at Christmas to reflect their grudges. They are quite passive aggressive and for sure the gift you get reflects whether they are in the middle of hating you or not. If you’re on the outs with them you might get a $15 gift while they give someone else at the same Christmas dinner a $200 gift. It’s obnoxious. In that situation the money counts, because it directly reflects the thought with them.
This year I haven’t bought one gift. It’s just my husband and I this holiday time. Just fine with me. I do have a friend visiting on the 23rd, I might get her a little something. Not sure.