Oh gosh, dear. You are playing victim to advertising hype.
Think of your hair more like leather, something which was once alive, but is no longer.
It does indeed need to be cared for, kept clean, and conditioned, but it it in no way so complex as advertising would have you believe.
The main job of conditioner is to keep hair from being dry, which makes it brittle, leading to breakage.
Your scalp naturally dispenses oils for this.
However, the oils, and purchased conditioners do eventually dry, and become nasty.
Your very best thing to remember in hair care is to keep it clean, and comb, not brush in long strokes. Those natural oils are the best thing for your hair.
Purchasing a conditioner is a help, and should not replace the natural oils.
When shampooing, clean thoroughly, and rinse thoroughly. Adding conditioner should not be applied at the scalp level, but rather to the hair shafts only. Applying to the scalp clogs pores and obstructs the health of your scalp and hair.
I am aging, and disabled, so I had to cut my hair to better care for it.
Before that, my hair was three feet long, and always soft. I do know what I am talking about.
Don’t try to get all scientific over hair.
Good luck.
Advertising tries scare tactics to sell their products. Don’t allow them to victimize you.