When I was in 6th grade my crazy meth head parents took me out of school. I was considered a drop out through 6th-10th grade. 3 months ago I finally had the option to go back too school. At first I tried to apply as a sophomore but they checked my school records and said I’ll have to be a freshman, I was devastated at that and it was a hard time for me, because I had other problems as well Including a dependence on opiates. The first month of school was roller coaster for me.
I was completely exhausted by the end. But I did manage slow down on my pill habit I wasn’t physically addicted to them anymore (went through the horrible withdrawals).

But soon after I decided to try meth thinking it will help me get through the school days. Big mistake. Meth had the worst effects on me, physically and mentally.

I went on a two week binge with no food and little to no sleep. When I ran I took a 3 day break then got more to go on another 2 week binge. By the end of the 2nd month of school I looked like fucking golem. The bags under my eyes were so dark it looked like I had two black eyes. And I lost 10 lb even though I was already under weight. My supplier cut me off immediately because he was afraid I was gonna get caught, It was so obvious I was a tweaker I acted and looked like one. God coming off that shit was hard I would search my carpet trying to find shards of meth for HOURS. But I got through it and been clean from meth for over a month I never wanna touch that stuff again it’s pure poison to the mind, body and soul.

I been clean of opiates and cigarettes for two weeks now. The only drug I still do is weed which I smoke everyday (not ready to give it up yet).

I started taking care of myself too, eating healthy mediating and exercising daily. In just two weeks I seen a big improvement in my well being. So my state of mind is in okay place right now and improving day by day. I am confident that I won’t lose myself anytime soon.

I have managed too exceed in all my class’s even though I was on drugs the whole time. And when I say exceed I mean EXCEED my grades can’t be any higher.

I mean I’m no genius; I’m a 16 year old in freshman classes that are too easy for me. But what frustrates and scares me is I really want to skip a grade, I NEED too actually. Going to school won’t be a option once I turn 18 because I’ll be needing some minimum wage job to afford some cheap apartment (I’m legally on my own the moment I turn 18)

I know that I’ll be fine if I skipped 9th grade, the classes I’m taking are extremely easy for me I’m getting 110% on all of them (A+) except Spanish. They should pull me up atleast one grade, right? I mean I didn’t go to school for 3 years then show up and have it all down by the first month. I was 3 grades behind everyone and Still was the best in my class almost immediately.

The problem is my counselor and the school district are reluctant to help. My counselor told me even if I have the best grades I could possibly get for the whole year still won’t help, and the only grade I’d have even a chance of skipping is senior year. But that won’t do me any good because I ain’t gonna make it too junior year before I’m 18!!!!

I feel like these 2 years of high school (freshman and sophomore) are gonna be a waste I’m not challenged at all and I won’t gain anything at the end.

I’m in a stressful position i don’t have any friends. lost the only one I had, which is what led me to stop taking drugs and seek a better life (it’s what my friend would’ve wanted for me so I did it for him, even though it doesn’t matter now). I’m still going through horrible cravings and my loneliness isn’t helping.

I always had to parent myself (because my real ones never did) and obviously im not very good at it. But for the first time I’m actually taking responsibility. I now care about my not so far future ( I use to except the fact that I’m gonna end up a homeless junkie).

Any advice on how to avoid this horrible future that I seem to be destined to endure. I’m basically on my own, I’m just a 16 year old girl, I never ask for this mess and it’s hard dealing with it alone.