Talk therapy with a qualified therapist (not you psychiatrist). Work on self confidence takes time.

Walking with a friend is a good idea.

Taking a cab is avoidance of resolving your issues.

@zenvelo Ok I will go and talk to a therapist on Tuesday. Thanks.

Talking to a therapist is a good idea.

Something else you can do is to keep a journal. It is a good way of thinking things through. Don’t run away from your fears. Confront them. Some things to ponder: What makes you think you won’t fit in? Do your clothes really not fit? What is the worst that can happen if you really don’t fit in?

If you can learn to not care about other people’s opinion regarding yourself there wouldn’t be nervousness in the first place. Just think of yourself as a paying customer and you deserve the same right as everybody else. Or just ingrain it in your mind that you’re a superior individual and everybody else are insignificant/below you. This way, your mind will stop comparing between you and other people (which produce nervousness) because in your mind you’re the perfect/superior standard of a human being. Trade your nervousness for self-inflicted snobbishness.

Whiskey. Apply liberally with a shot glass.
Seriously, look at the other people in the store. No matter how weird you think you may look to others, there are others who look worse than you, so don’t sweat it.

Talk therapy, with specific goals in mind, is really the only way. Then, you should join some real live groups of people, doing activities that you enjoy. You have to step in a little bit at a time, but if you don’t actually DO something, then you can never alleviate this problem.

A Support Group would also be very helpful. You should be able to find one within this website.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy looks to be very effective too.

Here is a Canadian site designed to help people with Anxiety

I live with chronic anxiety. I use daily meditation and regular exercise to help, and they really work.

When one gets that feeling that one does not fit in..its an internal intuitive message to one that that is not the environment that one really wants. So grocery shopping at that particular store is not to your liking and thus you feel anxious. So perhaps a different type of Market is more suited for you…look around to what is available in your Town.
Obviously you are sensitive to people, places and things that make your comfortable or not?
This is actually a good thing as most are not in touch with there inner guidance.
Go more with your intuitive insights to gravitate to where it is best for you and whom etc. Its an inner guidance system and more of us would be better off to adhere to those impulses more often , lucky you as you are more in touch than you think.

^^ Except that the OP had told us repeatedly that he is a virtual prisoner in his own home for years.

He has anxiety about almost everything that most people do on a regular basis, such as actually leaving their apartment, or going to any store to buy needed food, or simply to walk down his own block, or meet up with any actual humans. That’s not insight, that is a situation that needs some intervention.

@Kardamom
Just answer the question preferably in the positive rather than targeting him for all to see.
By the way..he DOES get out often and is working on his anxiety.

@Inspired2Write. I am going by what he has said to all of us on numerous occasions.

We have all given our friend good, sound advice, for years. But you can tell a horse about the water in the trough, but unless the horse gets some good therapy, you can’t make him drink.

@Inspired_2write , Maybe what the OP tells you is different from what he tells us. The question clearly states that he gets an anxiety attack when he goes down the block to get groceries. If he is working on his anxiety, why is he asking this question? Whatever he has been doing for his anxiety obviously is not working. Why did the idea of seeing a therapist seem so novel to him? Based on past advice we have given, my guess is that he will not be seeing any therapist.

It is a common mistake to determine that just because some one has an illness that ALL problems are attributed to this, which in his case he has not disclosed that its his neighborhood that he lives in everyday that is dangerous and more so for him.

The city that he lives in has the highest crime rate in the Country and thus unsavory types abound as taxi drivers,homeless people,housekeepers etc
He has had to navigate daily a street that is overrun by panhandlers of which some are very aggressive.Imagine a normal person going through that everyday, even they would be anxious and nervous as well, cut him some slack and quit compounding his anxiety by making him a victim once more.
He is my son and is the gentle giant that assists those unfortunate that do not come from an attitude of force but from genuine helplessness
. He gives to charities generously, as well as some who live on the streets and are helpless. Some here do not really know him nor anyone else personally and yet feel very judgmental towards him and others perhaps?
It is NOT anyone’s business but his own whether he is seeing a therapist nor does he HAVE to inform anyone here on this site nor any other!
He views some here as Friends who care , but clearly some are expecting him to adhere to YOUR advice ignoring the fact of his right to choose whats right for himself?

Yes he does in fact see and receives help in the way of compassionate understanding people
that know the stigma that others put him through and thus can do nothing about that except to educate the community on how much misunderstanding is out there on the trials that he and others go through from many.
It is a wonder that some like him can go out without anxiety in that environment. He is open and honest a bit too much I think and thus creates this backlash that is unbelievably harsh in some incidences.

Think on this truly” Would YOU be able to bear what he does everyday with a disability as well”, probably not!

He is reaching out to talk with others whether he takes your advice or not doesn’t matter as its ones choice to do so or not without recriminations .

He is merely communicating with what he thought was a good group?

I can only go by what @RedDeerGuy1 says. I don’t see any mention of crime rates or panhandlers. What he says is ”I get scared that I don’t fit in, like that my clothes don’t fit and what not”. What the heck is that supposed to mean? Is it supposed to be a veiled reference to racial differences? I did a search and found that Red Deer’s population is almost all white. The black population, for example, is only .8% of the total. Link.

He is under no obligation to follow our advice, but it does get frustrating to keep seeing the same questions asked and the same advice given. One would reasonably expect that if he says that he is going to follow some piece of advice, like seeing a therapist, then he will in fact carry through with it. Otherwise, what basis is there for a conversation?

^^ Exactly. What are we to do? Are we supposed to guess, and assume, that what our friend is saying is not true? Are we supposed to read his questions, and then just not answer them? He asks for help, we offer sound advice, he chooses not to take it, then we get chastized for giving him advice that could actually help, and then we get told that we don’t know the situation.

This all just leaves me scratching my head. If the main problem is that our friend lives in a bad neighborhood, maybe his relative should help him to move to a better place.

Our friend has never mentioned to us that he is living in a high crime area. He has told us repeatedly that he is afraid and anxious about a whole host of things, and has felt that way for most of his life. Those are the things he tells us, and those are the things he asks about.

He has problems, but he is not a child, and we have to treat him like any other adult that comes here and asks similar questions.

If the Mods think that there is something else going in here, behind the scenes, or regarding the family dynamic, maybe they ought to discuss it with our friend and his mother, behind the scenes, and then let us know if we need to stop giving advice to people who ask for assistance.

We all have our friend’s best interest in mind. That is why we tailor our advice, with actual links to sites that can be useful to him. I don’t think anyone is trying to be a jerk.

@LostInParadise
Of course HE doesn’t fit into a crime ridden area! He has very little choice as his treatment is in that City!
Of course he doesn’t mention the area as no one has asked?
Giving race percentages mean little to crime as anyone is able to do engage in crime!
He sees it everyday, has experienced unjust treatment and now unjust judgments from some person unknown to him personally, who knows only what he has posted and is most likely not sharing his values either? If you don’t like that one does NOT accept your advice then stop giving it to him! Obviously he is getting a wide variety of perspectives on what he is asking but in no way is he obligated to adhere to them. Its his choice to agree or not whether the advice aligns with his lifestyle, values and conscience. AS anyone else here does too.

@Kardamom
“What are you to do”?
If this is too much for you then stop answering his personal questions and instead give support to him in a positive way.What ever he decides is his prerogative and right.
I think all he wants is to be heard and acknowledged and to communicate with “Friends” in a supportive manner.
He already has professionals who offer the rest, here he needs supportive friends.

Perhaps in the future you could be so kind as to translate his questions and comments for us. It is a bit too much for me to get from fear that his clothes don’t fit to fear of being mugged. It is like he is speaking a different language.

@LostInParadise
I don’t need to translate anything for him.( insulting to ask this as it is Insensitive in your reply.
He will disclose as he feels comfortable with.
Stop answering his questions or ASK him for more details as long as its not too invasive regarding his privacy?
No one here is an expert, but please be sensitive in giving advice. He is JUST seeking friendly conversation to feel like a normal person , not judgments as he is inundated with too much.
Your choice to answer or not,but use positive encouragement is all I ask.