I have a sister who I now realized has battled with depression and self esteem issues all of her life. She’s gone through counseling and has been a counselor herself.

She is extremely self centered. One of her philosophies is that she needs to make herself happy first. Everyone else comes 2nd (no, she’s never had children.)

Another philosophy is that she doesn’t worry about what she says to others, or how she says it, will affect them because there is no way to know how they’re going to react, and they are responsible for their own reactions.

Recently we touched on this. When that subject came up I said I try to think of how this might affect a person, based on what I know about them. I really don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings if I can help it. Sometimes I decide not to say anything at all.

She disagreed with me. She said I am not responsible for how others feel. Well, I say that when they’re dealing directly with me, I do indeed have some responsibility for them. (And whatever you do, do NOT disagree with HER. She is very quick to get defensive and escalates from 0 to 90 in literally seconds. It’s like walking on egg shells when you’re around her. There is no telling how she’ll react or to what.)

On the flip side, if you don’t admire her art work she gets extremely defensive, angry because I don’t understand where she’s coming from.

I think she deveoloped all of these ideas through the counseling she has received and I think someone missed the mark somehow. This world is not about ME and ME ALONE.