My boyfriend has a best friend that he grew up with. He considers him family. His friend got into drugs at some point and ended up in trouble. The plan was to let him move in, make sure he stayed clean, and help him get his life together. This was the plan before my boyfriend and I moved in together and I knew of this plan.

The time has come and his friend is now staying with us. Having a guest is probably always hard to adjust to. It’s awkward for both sides. We’re all trying to settle into this new situation.

Before he got here, I asked my boyfriend if there was a time frame of how long he would be staying. He said it’s hard to put a timeframe on it because he wants to make sure he stays clean. I understand but in my opinion, if someone isn’t motivated enough, they may never leave.

I don’t want to keep bringing it up and come off as insensitive. I’m also trying to stay compassionate of the situation and remind myself that my boyfriend only wants to help his best friend. However, I know my limits and eventually I will start to become resentful if I have no end date to look forward to.

Am I being unreasonable to ask for a specific amount of time? Should I let it go and realize I can’t control everything? Or do I bring this up again and risk my boyfriend taking it the wrong way? I don’t want to be selfish about this. Yes, it’s my house too but I did know about this ahead of time. I know this is a temporary issue and eventually we’ll have the house back to ourselves but I worry that he’s going to let him overstay and become comfortable with an extra roommate.