The idea of hanging around dying folks (nursing homes, hospices) is not something I have recently considered, and it’s an excellent suggestion, Wildflower.
You know, when I was a teenager, I used to do volunteer work at a nursing homes, and mostly it was reading to the elderly, because usually, their eyes were no longer able to focus properly, so they couldn’t read all that well, when they got into their 80s and 90s.
I made friends with a lot of the folks there, and the reason I stopped visiting those places, was because I was losing one elderly friend a week, it seemed, to “The Grim Reaper.”
You expect that some of your friends will die eventually, of course, but you just don’t expect to be attending funerals and purchasing flowers, so often.
One elderly lady (“Grace”) at a nursing home I frequented, was kind of a “surrogate Grandma” to me, and I made sure I visited her, 3 or 4 times per week.
I’d sit in a chair next to her bed and hold her hand, while telling her about all of my dreams and plans for my future (I was 15 or 16, then). I’d also read the newspaper to her, and her personal mail.
One day, I came to visit her and she wasn’t her normal, smiling self. She was as friendly to me as always, but I had these feelings that she was worried about something, so I asked her if everything was OK. She gave me a weak smile, squeezed my hand very tight and said, “I’m so glad you came to see me, today.”
She then closed her eyes and went to sleep, forever, still clutching my hand.
I cried continuously, for the next week. It was shortly after that, that I lost all interest in visiting such places.
Still, you have given me an excellent idea to consider, and I am indeed very grateful.
Thank you.
August 31, 2008, 6:51 PM EDT