When I was a toddler, my dad threw me off the roof of the house repeatedly, until gramma caught him at it.
I jumped off the roof, but not with an umbrella. I used the supple branch of a pear tree.
Let’s see, other stunts.
Walked the top of my swingset. After watching Olympic gymnasts, I added some tricks. No round of dismounts though. It was too high for that.
Chased up a tree by a killer sow, pink squealers in her wake.
Fight with a water moccasin.
Chased up the side of a log cabin by a rooster with spurs that long.
Hit by a bike, more than one car, a school bus, a van.
Balance beam walks on the caprail of my YP, while under way.
Driving in all sorts of weather, at times when FedEx would not even dispatch.
Leaping from vehicle to another, doing the speed limit.
Faced down a guard dog which was on the loose.
Escaped a would be rapist.
Climbed masts to untangle lanyards.
Told a banger no when he demanded a cigarette, 2am, I was alone and he had a friend with him. I turned my back to them, and walked away.
Laughed at the girl who held a knife on me.
Freaked out my dad when he was mad and going to beat me. He was 6’2”, 250. I was under five feet, and still waiting to reach a hundred pounds. He grabbed me, and I slipped his grip, turned on him with clenched fists and resolute soul. He looked at my face, and his eyes turned silver. I had scared the piss out of him. I stormed out of the house with him still standing there.
Late teens one time was drunk, and on the roof of a five story building. I might have flown. I’m not sure. I remember standing on the waist high ledge looking down. I don’t remember how I got down or into bed.
On base in Mississippi, there were Navy and Marines. The Marines I hung out with told me there was this guy everybody called the Hawaiian, because, he was. They said he was huge, and had a short fuse. Everyone was scared of him.
I couldn’t resist I had to goad him. (It’s a story by itself)
Driving city cab the night shift is fraught with stories.
I got more, but my phone battery is low.