My friends get together a lot. I really want to join them, but my parents have certain rules and I’m not really allowed to visit their houses a lot. I live a little far from the centre of the city as well, where most of my friends live.
So what they do now is when they meet up, they rarely ask me if I want to join. And when I find out through social media they say “Well, you wouldn’t have come anyway and we didn’t want to make you feel bad so we chose not to tell you.” And when I respond saying that maybe they could come over to my house they just say “Not really, it’s a little far, and your parents are always there so we can’t have fun.” And that just makes me feel so bad. I see how close my friends are to each other and each other’s families and I just don’t have that relationship with anyone. I constantly feel like I’m the extra, the backup plan, amongst us. And I’m so lonely.
But it’s not the issue of my parents’ rules I’m writing about. I’m used to those, they’ve been in place since I was little. All i want is for my friends to be a little more accepting of my family values and at least try to make me feel included, like maybe simply asking if I would like to join them even if they know I won’t. It would make me feel like I’m wanted there you know and not just overlooked all the time.
I’ve tried to talk to them about this and all they say is that that’s a dumb request, I shouldn’t expect them to ask me every time they meet up if I’m only going to be there 2 out of 10 times. My best friend is no longer keen to be around me because I’m “boring, and at least the other girls actually do stuff.”
They’re telling me I’m being unreasonable and demanding but I don’t think I am. I think I’m just asking for basic courtesy especially since we’re supposed to be friends.
What do you guys think?