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Silver0330's avatar

How do you deal with a sister that is a covert narcissist besides going no contact?

Asked by Silver0330 (10points) December 26th, 2020
5 responses
“Great Question” (3points)

My sister who is a covert narcissist ( she’s never been professionally diagnosed but fits the profile in the book they use to determine if your a cluster B type personality) by lies and manipulation forced me to move out of our mothers home by saying I was physically and financially abusing our mother who was 89 at the time . I had been our mothers caregiver for the last five years at this time. To make a really long story short during the three months I was not allowed to go to my moms because of an temporary elder abuse restraining order, which was dropped at the first court date after the hearing. The reason for this attack was because I showed my sister the will our mother wrote and that she was leaving the house to me ( at this point in time I had no idea that my sister was a narcissist only that whenever she was around things were not right) well my sister I guess thought she was more “entitled “ to the house than I was so again through manipulative actions had our mom give durable power of attorney to her daughter , my niece. In nov of 2020 I was told my mom was in the hospital and I could go see her and I thought maybe my sister and her daughter were going to apologize for all what they have done since this started in 2017 , but they knew our mom was dying and when they said come see her she was already unconscious and she passed 2 days later . I called an attorney near the end of November who informed me after checking to see if anything was filed for our mom , showed me a copy of a quitclaim deed that was signed by my niece that quitclaimed my moms house to my sister and my niece. Lawyers in my area won’t take a probate that will be contested but the one who found the deed also told me that the judge would overturn any actions like the deed when he saw the will. My problem is putting myself back into the lions den . I have never been able to deal with my sister and it has been during this time I realized that my sister has NPD (narcissist personality disorder). I would just like to get some input on what to do thanks

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Answers

canidmajor's avatar

This site, https://outofthefog.website/, is very comprehensive and helpful, and includes resources and various fora where you can ask questions and present specifics and have people respond to your exact situation.
It helped me enormously when I went No Contact with my mother five years ago.
I found it to be much more helpful than a general ask-and-answer site like this.

Good luck with this!

janbb's avatar

Only you can decide how important the house is to you. If it is, put on your big girl pants and fight it; if you need to walk away from it for your sanity, then do that.

elbanditoroso's avatar

Your sister’s personality has nothing to do with the legal status of the claim to the house.

None of us are lawyers here.

snowberry's avatar

If you choose to fight for the house, you might want to change your phone number first, and maybe go so far as putting up security cameras. Narcissists are capable of all sorts of nonsense.

Foxytrot's avatar

I have found distance and no contact with prayer of love helps. I know it can be very frustrating. Once you have decided to cut ties it becomes easier and time heals hurt feelings. When you catch yourself thinking of her switch your thoughts to focusing on yourself. You cant change someone however you can change how you feel. Do not own any abuse let the other person keep it. Be the wiser one, be silent.
Be blessed and stay strong.

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