I know that there are a lot of services that will pick up compostable waste from me and (theoretically, allegedly, maybe) use it to grow stuff. Does anything like that exist for the output from a composting toilet? Alternatively, is there any other composting toilet solution for my situation (see below)?
My situation: I live in an urban apartment and I don’t grow anything. I’m not handy and I have no initiative, but I am SUPER-RICH (okay, maybe not quite, but I’m willing to spend some money). I do have a little bit of a yard. I want a composting toilet, but I would like it

1. to be easy to use,
2. to work in an upper-floor apartment, and
3. to produce output that I don’t personally have to use.

I’m guessing #3 is probably impossible, but I figured I would ask the experts (aka y’all).
Maybe one day I will find someone who will pick up my poop for me, just like I do for my dog….

Topics: home improvement, gardening, environment, trash, toilets, DIY, services, ecommerce, waste