The first birthday of my late husband after he died, his surviving family planned a special observance.

By the second, that did not seem appropriate or necessary, but neither did ignoring it. It’s not an ordinary day. I won’t be forgetting the date. A cake does not seem suitable; I’m not celebrating.

My deceased parents’ birthdays were the occasion of reminiscences among my siblings. For various reasons, that won’t work for my husband.

What do you do on those special dates?

Topics: birthdays, deceased loved ones, family observances, family calendar, noncelebrations