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Jeruba's avatar

Widow or widower: What have you done with your late spouse's wedding ring?

Asked by Jeruba (55163points) 3 weeks ago
7 responses
“Great Question” (4points)

I have not yet taken mine off, even though I feel a little weird about wearing it. I would like to know what other people have chosen to do.

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LuckyGuy's avatar

(((Hugs))) I know there is a lot of emotion behind this question.
I am not a widower, but I am the child of one. My late mother passed her wedding ring and engagement ring on to my brother and me. We modified them or used them for the rings of our spouses. We will most likely pass them on to our grandchildren when the time comes.
There is something magical about being able to say that a certain ring was worn by a certain great grandparent. To me, that has much more value than the gold or diamond itself.

chyna's avatar

I am not a widower either, but my mother was. My dad died in 1975 and she wore the simple silver band until she died in 2011. I now have it in a small heart shaped jewelry box that my brother made.

JLeslie's avatar

My grandmother still wore her ring at times when she became a widow.

I think my grandmother still felt she was Mrs. Lastname for a long while after my grandfather died, even though she was always very independent.

If I remember correctly she even wore it when she later was in a relationship with another man after the death of my grandfather.

I wear that ring now, it’s one of my many rings. My sister took it initially when my grandmother passed away, but she gave it to me a few years later, because she said she wasn’t wearing it. I love it. I think of my grandmother whenever I put it on, but not so much that it was a wedding ring, more that it was her ring.

The ring can be so symbolic. It’s not really about how others perceive the ring, it’s more about how you feel about the ring. Do you feel it’s a symbol of you not moving on because you still wear it? Your husband did not pass away very long ago. More importantly, I don’t think wearing the ring has to symbolize that at all. You can just like the ring! Your memories with your spouse are there, ring or not.

You can always take it off for a while and then go back to it. See how you feel. In my opinion there are no rules.

Dig_Dug's avatar

These two were married a long time and she would never take her rings off for any reason. She had her diamond wedding ring and an ruby ring (for her birth stone) and an emerald ring (for his birth stone). When she passed, her husband had her cremated per her wishes, and to stay true to her wishes, put her three rings into her urn with her ashes so she could keep her rings with her forever.

Blackwater_Park's avatar

I can tell you what my grandmother did when my grandfather passed. She gave his ring to me. I wear it on special occasions.

LadyMarissa's avatar

My husband died in his sleep in 2007. I still feel as married to him as I did the day we vowed our love for each other. I have NO desire to share that love with anyone else, so I’m still wearing my wedding rings on my left hand. My heart still belongs to him & I’m NOT interested in finding someone to fill that void. At the same time, I had NO desire to get married again when I met him, but I knew the second he said his first word to me that we would be married. So, unless I meet a man who “I just know is him”, I have NO plans to remove my ring!!!

In my younger days, most widows moved their wedding ring to their right ring finger to show they were a widow & possibly available. I’m NOT available, so I’ve not moved my ring. Many of my friends think that my way is unhealthy. I say it’s NONE of their business & I use my “mother ears” when they start preaching to me.My ring is NOT coming off until I feel it is the right time!!!

Love_my_doggie's avatar

@Jeruba Oh, sweetie, my (long belated?) sympathies for your loss. I had no idea.

After my father had passed away, my mother wore his wedding ring on a chain around her neck. I always thought that was a nice remembrance.

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