This is a difficult question, because I have so often been disappointed by my birthday that I have come to fear and loathe it. In addition, I can never forget that each birthday brings me one year closer to my demise. I’m not fond of the thought of my demise, except for when I’m depressed, in which case I hope to prevent any further birthdays from being celebrated.
There are, however, three birthdays that I remember, so I guess they would be candidates for favorite, if there can be said to be a favorite. The first is also when I was five. My mother, for the only time in my life, invited the whole kindergarten class to attend. It was amazing and overwhelming, and I think my greatest concern was for the girl who had her birthday on the same day as mine.
The second birthday I can remember is when I was maybe 12 or so. I had developed this great, not politically incorrect, desire to taste whale meat. My parents searched everywhere, and finally found a restaurant in Boston that served the stuff. We had to drive two hours to get there. Even my grandparents came in the car. I don’t remember the meal, though. I just remember that people must have worked so hard to make it happen. I believe that was the only time I was treated that way by my parents.
The third time was when I turned 20. We were sitting in a chalet high up the side of a Swiss mountain. The chalet had a porch overlooking the valley. You could see for miles up the valley to our left, and down the valley to our right. Across the valley stood another mountain side. That night, there was a lightning storm. You could see the lightning striking the mountain sides across the valley, and down towards the lower end. This natural fireworks display went on for hours, and I stayed put on the porch to watch it all. I felt like nature was taking notice of this anniverasy of mine. I guess nature knows how to throw a celebration, even if noone else does.
That’s not fair. The real problem is I don’t like myself very much. Maybe if I could learn to like myself, I’d enjoy birthdays.