While it might be that those who commit suicide are in a black whole of emotional pain (and I am not talking here of those who are on their death beds and want a way out of their physical pain), the wake of their action in taking their life is enormous. They cannot imagine or are just unable to think about all those who love them whose lives will be so deeply affected. I am watching a family now deal with this kind of loss, and I find it hard to believe that the person who killed himself couldn’t know how horrible it would be for his family—his wife and children. :“What was he thinking?” has become a popular refrain.
I think this act is the most selfish and cowardly thing a person can do. And truly, passive aggressive, in its most powerful form.
It is much harder and, I now realize, hugely praiseworthy, to turn oneself into an institution to get help and prevent yourself from doing yourself harm. You save not only yourself, but all those who love you, and even those who may just know and like you. Or even those who don’t know you that well, and don’t care for you. All are damaged in a suicide.