@Mr_M: Because you can’t make it happen. I’m with Jeruba on this one. I am constantly having intellectually stimulating conversations. You could say it’s because I work at an academic institution, except this was happening before I started working here.
Jeruba writes: Hmm. Perhaps I do something like this: offer a comment or perspective that is maybe not an obvious one, followed by a query intended to elicit some thought.
I think it’s the question part that is key. But here’s the thing about questions. You actually have to be genuinely interested in what you are asking about, or it won’t work. I think stimulating questions are generated out of two things: curiousity and experience. If you ask a person about their experience, eventually you will find something that you know something about, that may or may not conflict with their idea.
Like Jeruba, I read. Science Fiction, the New Yorker, The Sun. You learn so much about a wide variety of things, and it’s almost always possible to ask intelligent questions about something someone is an expert in, and they you’re off to the races.
Still, you have to want it. You have to ask. It’s easier with people who have a strong interest of their own. It helps if you hang around with students who have serious interests. More likely to find them at artist parties in third floor walkups, or at a gallery, or at a library, than in the dining hall. Although, once you’ve found a few, the dining hall can become the place to meet them. And you always have your studies to talk about. Your courses should give you a ton of things to be interested in, so long as you don’t fall prey to the idea that school is only for school, and the rest of your time is for fun.
Oh, and if you do hang out at a gallery, and you catch that short, bearded schlumpy looking guy with glasses looking at you. Be sure to go over and ask him a question. You’ll be surprised at the answer he gives. Enjoy!