My level of confidence depends on the setting. In childhood and adolescence, I had no confidence. I was abused, and had no self-esteem. I have worked hard for many years to develop some confidence. I my career capacity, I feel most confident not only in my abilities, but also in knowing that I am helping others, so that gave me a boost in my sense of self-worth.
In relationships and social situations I still have confidence issues. But as I’ve met more people over my 43 years, I’ve learned that we all have self doubt, and that usually the people that come off as very confident (or even arrogant) are often the most insecure.
A therapist of mine once advised me to “fake it ‘til you make it.” Behave as though you do have confidence… walk with your head high, be the first to approach someone and introduce yourself, look poeople in the eye when you speak, speak distinctly and reduce the “ummm” and “ya know” and other interjections that indicate lack of confidence.
Acting confident even when you don’t feel that way gives you practice and helps you develop new habits. And as you acheive success in you endeavors, you become more confident! I does work. (Don’t dwell on the times you slip-up, though. Forgive yourself for being human).
Good luck!