I want to know at least who they are. I don’t hide who my ex’s are to guys I am interested in if it comes up in conversation. Why should I? I’m not ashamed of them and I think it’s healthy for a guy to know what he is getting into if he wants to be with me. If he can’t accept my past, will he be able to accept my future? It is said that past behaviour is a reliable predictor of future conduct. I would rather him find out who I am now than to find out who I am later on down the road when, say, we’re married, and it’s too late, and he finds out he’s totally not okay with me as a person. If he doesn’t accept me now, why should I expect him to later? If I’m not willing to be honest with him, am I doubting his interest in me? Am I trying to impress him by showing only my good side to him? Does that mean I don’t trust him? I think that if I feel like I can’t be honest with him, that is a BIG SIGN that he is not the right person for me. The same rules apply to him in my head. If he doesn’t want to tell me anything about his past, does that mean he doesn’t trust me? A relationship NEEDS trust, ABSOLUTELY. If he can’t find it in his heart to trust me, then pursuing a relationship with him is not worth it. If he can’t handle hearing about something as simple as who my ex’s are, then what does that say about his emotional stability? If I can’t handle hearing about his, what does that say about mine? If he only shows me his good side, how am I ever supposed to know him? Is he waiting until I’m “snagged” and am way too caught up in emotions to leave? Is that right? What about any potential children? How might they be affected by this? Shouldn’t they matter? Is a relationship full of romantic energy and pleasure really all that worth it if the downside is that after the spark fades out, you’re gonna end up with a broken home where either the father or the mother runs off? Where fights result? Where there’s never ending battles where you can’t seem to agree on anything? So, yeah, I think it’s DEFINITELY important to know about ex’s. It gives you an idea of what kinds of things the person you’re interested in as attracted to. It also lets you know how it shaped him or her as a person. If you do ask about the ex or ex’s, though, make sure you don’t ask anything you don’t actually want to know the answer to, because he or she might just tell you! It’s also important to train yourself not to be a jealous person if you are and to also accept that the person you are interested in DOES have a past. You have a past, too, so remember that. If you don’t want to reveal something about yourself, don’t be surprised if your significant other does not want to reveal that same thing about himself or herself.