“Inadvertant” as in accidentally, not on purpose, unintentional. I did not even know an “emotional affair” existed until yesterday. I figured if you didn’t cheat physically – all was good.
jmah – it’s not that I don’t care about my husband, I just indicated I married him very young and it was never a real passionate thing – like I thought it should have been.
Thanks for all the input so far. It’s a tough thing to figure out. I want to be honest, but being honest to make myself feel better that makes him feel crappy is not okay. Perhaps it would be beneficial for him to realize something is missing in our relationship for me to end up in this place and we should be working on that.
When I told the friend that I realized we are having an “emotional affair” and I needed to end it before it destroyed my relationship with my husband, I also indicated I was thinking about explaining it all to my husband. “Friend” does not think this is a good idea and it would “ruin his friendship” with my husband. It seems to me secrets are not a good thing and creates an “intimacy” that kind of continues things in a way.