When I lost my mind, I was aware I was changing. My mind kept on going faster and faster. It was really weird. I’d never felt that before, and I thought maybe my mind was doing one of those evolutionary things—like thinking everything it could as fast as possible because it knew it was about to go kaput—from cancer or something.
After a while, I stopped trusting my own judgment. I started reacting in ways that I thought might well be inappropriate. I even asked people, and they said I was ok, but after I was diagnosed and treated, I look back and think that I was not acting appropriately.
In essence, I was watching myself go crazy. I started doing things I had never done in my life—seeking out sex wherever I could; yelling at my children; constantly being irritated by those I loved. I knew something was wrong, but I had no idea what it was. told my doctor, and he said he’d give me a referral to a shrink, but he didn’t say he thought I should see one. He left it up to me, and since he didn’t seem to think it was urgent, I didn’t go until my wife told me it was really, really urgent.
I knew I was losing my mind. I watched it go. I didn’t recognize myself after a while, and that lead to problems figuring out which me was the real me. After being treated with drugs and therapy, I have come back to being the old me. Still, I was a crazy me for a while. Some might think I still am, but they have no idea what I was like when I really was crazy.
@ABoyNamedBoobs03 I think you may well be right to be worried. One of the people in my group also gets severe migraines which are related to her bipolar disorder. Your other symptoms sound like me before I got diagnosed. You might want to research bipolar disorder, and if it sounds too familiar, then get yourself to a psychiatrist as soon as you can. It will get so much worse if it isn’t treated.