Good advice above… and I also wonder about the line regarding being a “perfect gentleman/lady”. Nobody is perfect. Perhaps the individual in question is trying too hard to be something that they are not, and that is evident to others.
I have found that nature’s beauty lies in the imperfections that make us unique. We need to relax and be ourselves, and let our true characters shine through. After all, we all want to be loved for who we are not for who we think the other person wants us to be. Relationships built on pretense never succeed, and I personally suspect this has much to do with the high divorce rate.
If this person isn’t happy with who they are, then they need to work on themselves and forget about attempting to date. Because it is true that unless you love yourself, you can not truly share love with another. I learned this in a 7-year relationship I had, when neither he nor I had much self-confidence. And so although each of us loved the other very deeply, we were unable to accept or believe that the other loved us! We had issues with insecurities, jealousy, controlling and suspicions. It was not pretty.