General Question

jjosephs's avatar

Getting it on with the girl next door?

Asked by jjosephs (115points) August 9th, 2009
26 responses
“Great Question” (0points)

The girl 4 houses down the road actually.

Situation – there’s been a series of robberies and break-ins in the neighbourhood I moved into 4 months ago. Two weeks ago Sunday there was a neighborhood watch meeting where a sexy neighbor told me about a break-in that occurred recently. We didn’t have a convo. or even get a chance to say my name as she left early and the meeting occupied us both. There was however an email sent out with all our names and address.

I need tips on how to approach her smartly to ensure “progress” as we get to know each other?


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Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

please don’t email her because using the email you got for the reason above to get with her is well sleazy

J0E's avatar

Spy on her in hopes of catching her undressing, then one day she will probably knock on your door all wet and looking for a towel, in the moments afterwords you may or may not find out that she is a porn star. But never fear, you will win her over, take her to prom and bang her in a limo…

…unless that’s from some movie I saw…nah.

J0E (13172points)“Great Answer” (7points)
DeanV's avatar

You sound a little old for sex to be your number one priority…

Sorry to be snarky, but if you’re just looking for sex you may be out of luck. Most people just aren’t like that.

tramnineteen's avatar

Host a function with the whole neighborhood invited (you can use the e-mails). Even if she doesn’t come it then gives you an excuse to show up at her door with some small offering (maybe something you cooked) and say “I missed you at the party and just wanted to introduce myself, I’m Joe and new to the neighbor hood. Have some of my home-made jam.”

If she does come it’s way easier.

Mamradpivo's avatar

Go knock on her door and introduce yourself.

I know it sounds old-fashioned, but it’s way better than stalking her.

Do watch the windows though. You just never know.

jjosephs's avatar

@dverhey I’m looking for the whole package

Tink's avatar

Haha sorry the question title made me laugh.

Don’t act like if you just want to “get” with her when you talk to her. (even though that’s what you want to do)

Go to her house or on the next meeting introduce yourself.

Are you sure she will want you?

jjosephs's avatar

@Mamradpivo She has a baby (i think it might be hers – not sure) but I didn’t want to be greeted by her common-law

richardhenry's avatar

“Are you sure she will want you?”

If we waited for that knowledge, nobody would “get” with anybody.

DeanV's avatar

@jjosephs If you’re looking for the whole package, it probably would have been better to say that in your description, though. It makes you less likely to get snarky answers like mine.

Talk to her at this meeting again, and maybe talk about children. That way you can at least see if that’s her kid, or ask her about it. But going out and being sleazy won’t really get you anywhere. Neighborhood watch meetings ≠ Dance clubs. I may not know about your neighborhood watch meetings, though.

Tink's avatar

@richardhenry lol yeah but, if she has no interest in him, he should atleast get a clue.

whatthefluther's avatar

Make a point of introducing yourself at the next meeting. If you can’t wait until then, start walking your dog down the street by her house…you might just run into her. If you don’t have a dog, walk anyhow….you can probably use the exercise and it will expose you to all your neighbors, which is a good idea considering you are new to the neighborhood. You might just make lots of new friends.

richardhenry's avatar

Protip: It’s probably a bad idea to tell her that you’re “looking for the whole package” straight off the bat.

jjosephs's avatar

@richardhenry wasn’t planning to lol

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

Go watch the girl next door and hope to hades that it works out the same for you.


You could just talk to her.

bcstrummer's avatar

Omg dude I love these situations, they always make me think of American pie and the girl next door and all those other movies, my best guess:offer a date, or if you don’t wanna jump the gun, offer to babysit, or have them both over for dinner at your house, just some suggestions

ubersiren's avatar

Don’t stalk her, but check out her house on occasion to see if she does have a significant other. Give it a couple weeks. Or ask one of her closer neighbors. If you’re fairly certain she isn’t with someone, go knock on her door and tell her that you noticed her at the meeting and was wondering if she’d like to go for a walk sometime to get some coffee or lunch. As a woman, I would be flattered! How romantic it would be for a man to take the time for such a personal invitation.

Zen's avatar

I disagree with @Simone_De_Beauvoir . You all belong to a neighborhood watch and met at a town hall meeting. Your email addresses were sent out to all of you, so I don’t see anything “sleazy” in contacting her that way. Explain the circumstances in the email, and ask her if she is single and would like to meet for coffee somewhere.


Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Zen I just said that because the emails were not given out for that purpose – in fact it’s kind of counterproductive to use that in that way if you are supposed to be on neighborhood watch…

punkrockworld's avatar

Just wait until you see her again.. don’t use her email to approach her because that’s just creepyyy

benjaminlevi's avatar

If you rob her house you will probably get a chance to meet her

PandoraBoxx's avatar

Introduce yourself to the neighbors that live around her. Then when she talks to them, they’ll say “have you met the new guy?”

Zen's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir It seems that most would agree with you. I think the circumstances that led to all of their emails being sent out to each other allow for the approach. I think it depends on how you go about doing it: online date sites can be creepy, and pretty much anything can be creepy – if you’re a creep.

If you can express yourself eloquently, and your intentions are admirable, I don’t think it is so “unethical” or creepy or anything else to approach someone by email, if you are all on the same list that has been distributed and you are all on the neighborhood watch. It’s no different to me than, say, approaching someone who is a “friend of a friend” on facebook.

Ultimately, if she’s into you, then it will be a cute story for the grandchildren: we were on the neighborhood watch together (common interest, and community oriented) – and grandpa emailed grandma and well, the rest is history.

What’s email, grandpa?

It’s something old, from way before your time. We had to type things on a computer back then to correspond with each other. Go to sleep, son. Dream of electric sheep.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Zen or it could go like this ‘um, yeah grandpa and i met when we were on neighborhood watch and he helped me deal with this stalker dude that kept emailing me…what’s a stalker…go to sleep

Zen's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir ;-) Perhaps.

Tearofdeception's avatar

Be proactive! Find tips and tricks on how to keep your house secure, and send the email to everyone on that list. Then the day after, send her an email asking how she liked your tips! You could start like that… No way that’s considered “stalking”, unless she knows you have a plan behind all this lol

Good luck

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