In a true fight-or-flight situation, we have no way to know how we will react in that moment under those specific circumstances. Fortunately, I’ve never really been tested. But I was pleasantly surprised when I was able to calmly and rationally respond when my son (at 2 years old) fell and hit the corner of the concrete steps right between the eyes and had blood spurting out like a scene from a Monty Python movie! The same last weekend, when I watched a car skid off the road and jump the curb. I was able to calmly pull up and check on them and call it in to 911, even though I was all shaky inside.
However, sometimes I’m astonished when I have an adrenaline-fueled reaction and it is inappropriate, and I wonder how I can temper that. It seems to happen when I am caught off-guard by something that seems patently unfair.
For example, a physician I was working for ~15 years ago came into my test area and confront me in front of a patient about what was taking so long… it was not only unexpected, but also very unprofessional. Not all hearing evaluations are a piece-of-cake… different conditions make testing more complex, and some patients are just more difficult to assess. When I had finished with the patient and brought them to the exam room, he said something again, and something flew out of my mouth… I no longer remember the words, just the sense of feeling backed in a corner and almost out of my body with rage, as if my vision were whited-out. Fortunately, my direct supervisor supported me, but I looked for another job and was out of there in a few months.
It’s been a while since it’s happened, until recently when canceling a service that had been unused for months, but their policy was that you had to go through one final billing cycle before the cancellation takes effect. What a ripoff! I tried to keep my cool, but I started shaking, and let a few cusswords slip out… and I hate that because it is irrational, and seems to make it harder to try to negotiate from that point. (not that they were about to anyway).
I’d like to hear others’ experiences and advice on when the fight-or-flight kicks in when it’s not a physical emergency.