This is hard to imagine for me. But when I think about it, if I were looking now, I doubt if I would see my wife. I’d be looking for someone younger.
A lot of the reason I love her now is because of what we have been through together. I’m not sure how to picture this. Would she have the personality and interests she had when we first met? Then I would definitely be interested. If she had the interests she displays in our marriage, I wouldn’t be interested. But she wouldn’t be like that if we weren’t married, so she would probably be someone who attracted me a lot, if I gave her a chance.
I kind of feel bad about this answer because I want to be one of those people who would instantly say, “of course!” On the other hand, I don’t think it would have mattered who I married. By this time in the relationship, if I were single, I would be looking for someone different from the person I was currently married to. In fact, if I were single, I don’t think I’d want to marry anyone. I’d be either a loser or someone who can’t commit (which some might think is also a loser).