Social Question

noraasnave's avatar

On a scale from 1 to 10 how is your current S.O. relationship?

Asked by noraasnave (3094points) November 16th, 2009
71 responses
“Great Question” (2points)

1 being lowest; 10 being highest. This could either be a way to give massive credit, a way to earn points, an opportunity to come clean, or a realization that it might be time for a change.

Please also list one thing you would like to see change to make your current S.O. relationship better. Heck, this could even be a turning point to the relationship you always wanted.

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live_rose's avatar

The one thing I would change would be our communication I don’t want to be that whiny girlfriend that says “we don’t talk anymore” . . .but honestly we don’t.

noraasnave's avatar

Thank you so much for starting us off with an honest response! Lurve for you.

DominicX's avatar

Well, I have nothing to compare it to since it’s my first relationship. But as far as I’m concerned, he’s near perfect. The time we’ve been together has been absolutely amazing and the best time of my life. Before college started, I would’ve given it a 10 easily. Hard to now since it’s become a long-distance relationship… :(

noraasnave's avatar

@DominicX: So…? What is it? It isn’t a 10. Don’t keep us in suspense.

DominicX's avatar


I don’t know, 5? 5 points docked for being 200 miles apart…otherwise, it would be much higher.

Courtybean's avatar

On a scale from 1 to 10 how is your current S.O. relationship?


Please also list one thing you would like to see change to make your current S.O. relationship better.

For us- to not be together any more! Breaking-up would make this S.O relationship instantly better!

evegrimm's avatar

If 1 is the lowest an SO relationship can be, what about no relationship? Negative numbers?

Then I’m at, like, -∞. :D

That means I’m not, and have never been, in a relationship. Pitiful, I know. :P

noraasnave's avatar

@Courtybean and evegrimm:
Very sorry to hear that. Thank you for sharing.

live_rose's avatar

@Courtybean hugs for you too . . . hugs for everyone

evegrimm's avatar

Oh, did I come across as sad or having some doldrums? ‘Cuz I’m not, really.

It just seemed funny that the OP didn’t allow for those of us not in a relationship.

Ooops…was I not supposed to answer? :D

augustlan's avatar

@Courtybean What’s stopping you from taking that step?

Mine is about an 8. Since we’ve been struggling financially, it’s all about survival. We need more fun in our lives.

live_rose's avatar

@evegrimm well if your not sad I take my hug back :P . . . you had an opinion to share on the subject just like anyone else so you so should’ve answered. . . and you can keep the hug save it for later

tomnoel's avatar

6 sex is good most of the time but she hates me the rest of the time i think.

milla101's avatar

-10 at the moment, tomorrow may be a 7.

noraasnave's avatar

@chelseababyy, @milla101, @tomnoel

Is there no hope of improving the relationships that you are in? (description of my question above)

Roory's avatar

Well, Id say mine is around 8… he is a really great guy, but he could use a few pointers, just dont know how to let him know !

tomnoel's avatar

i would like to think there is but its a 50 50 thing you both have to be willing .

Courtybean's avatar

@noraasnave – no need to be sorry at ALL!! It really is quite amusing at present! Please read down to find out in what way it is so amusing!

Yes @evegrimm, you can take back my hug! I don’t need a hug! If anything I need a large hardcover book to smack this idiot of a boyfriend in the face! (A dictionary will do @evegrimm if you’re giving those out and I prefer a Websters one! It has a far superior face-to –book-cover ratio than any other dictionary available!)

Appropriate timing is the problem @Augustian! I want to speak to him about it in person. Although I did state that I wanted to whack him with a large book moments ago, it was a hypothetical solution! Unfortunately, no matter how abrasive can be or how badly I just want to scream in their face, listing all the reasons why they will alone in a very short amount of time…. alas… I can’t do it! Being nasty or vindictive is just not me!

Although he is being a TOTAL d***** bag at the moment, I have arranged to meet with him tomorrow night. In saying that I almost gave him the flick via a text message this arvo because he was going rank at me. I don’t understand why I simply asked him to clarify what he meant in his previous text.

Can anyone else decipher this for me because it’s what I got in trouble for asking about:

“I nevi sed! Nup is! Text messg’n game u know i **** hate the **** but year it’s all ***** cuz i know tis like this but it don’t have to be but you sid it would! I dunno hey?! I just thin it’s **** But yeah i will chat to you about it laterz!”

He doesn’t know?! lol I have NO idea what any of that means!!

When I told him to chill out because I was only asking him to explain what that message meant, he told me he would need to tell me face-to-face, rather than me “miss dissectosing it!”

Misdiagnosing? Disassociating? Ah… miss-descending? Or Miss-dissecting perhaps? I dunno- I’m pretty sure dissectosing isn’t a word isn’t a word full stop!

Also- can anyone tell me what an “Oreos” is/means in the context of having no/very little time to complete ones work and being stressed as a result of the “Oreos?” If anyone could shed some light on whatever an “Oreos” is I would be very grateful!

Silly me- Here I was thinking that “Oreos” were a bunch of delicious cookies… clearly I am mistaken!!

qashqai's avatar


about it laterz!?
Runz awayz fromz thatz f***ingz loserz!

PandoraBoxx's avatar

@Courtybean, obviously texting is not his forte.

This is better than a dictionary…

rooeytoo's avatar

It really depends on the day. Somedays, it would be a struggle to make 5 other days 9.5 would be about right. So that makes a 7.25 average. Not bad!

Janka's avatar


More time would solve any issues I have.

Courtybean's avatar

@gashgai yeah… laterz is totally gansta!!

@Pandora- I’m very aware that texting is not his forte, nor is typing but he refuses to check his work to make sure it makes sense…. actually speaking isn’t much either… He swears a LOT!!

HGl3ee's avatar

9.5; our relationship is absolutly wonderful<3

The only real thing I can think of that would improve is taking that next “big step”. We’re absolutly crazy about each other and we have both discussed the want/need to make a deeper commitment to each other ^_^ But right now, our lives have put that on hold; we know the time will eventually come though<3

We both have things we want to straighten out in our own individual lives before we make the next step as a couple. I think it’s mostly us wanting to clear any current worries so we can focus completely on each other.

I love him :D hehe

sakura's avatar

10 because he made me smile so much over the weekend and reminded me just how much he loves me and I love him!!!!

nmac's avatar

Hmm. It’s sparked a realization that I don’t have one. :/ 1.

poofandmook's avatar

There are three “periods” to our relationship that all have different rankings.

When we’re together: 10
When we’re normal long distance, talking frequently: 5 (like DominicX, 5 deducted for being 750ish miles apart)
When we’re normal long distance, barely talking because he’s swamped with schoolwork: 2 —if we text or email a few times, it goes up to a 3 or 4

What I would change, aside from the fact that he lives so far away, and aside from the fact that he procrastinates too much so he’s more swamped with schoolwork than he should be, therefore making it so we can’t talk more, is the way he feels about gay people. I don’t know how someone with gay roommates, gay friends, and a gay father ended up falling in love with a conservative on the subject, but I did. I hate it about him, but he tries really hard for me because he knows it’s important to me. Sure, I view it as an ignorance and not a moral/political position… but that doesn’t make me love him any less.

tedibear's avatar

Somewhere between a 5 and an 8 on any given day. Mostly dependent on his stress level and my reaction to it.

erichw1504's avatar

11. Nothing.

aphilotus's avatar

Ten. She’s the other half of me. Probably the better half.

deni's avatar

10.5 :’)

SuperMouse's avatar

I would give my relationship a 9;5. We are crazy in love, have incredible communication, and love to be together. The only issues are around life circumstances that we are slowly but surely working our way through. I thank God every day for helping me find my soul-mate.

cookieman's avatar


More (any?) time alone would get us to a 9.

After a bad few years, we’re both working on being less cynical and having some fun. Being a little more carefree would get us to a 10.

El_Cadejo's avatar

11 :)

Psychedelic_Zebra's avatar

12, the problem in our relationship isn’t her, it’s probably me.

El_Cadejo's avatar

gotta go one-uppin me dont ya :P

Psychedelic_Zebra's avatar

@uberbatman sorry. See, I told you the problem is me. =)

El_Cadejo's avatar


Aethelwine's avatar

@augustlan You answered just how I wanted to, except I was going to say a 9. The stress from having to struggle financially is very hard to ignore. When the stress does take over we just have to remind ourselves that even if we lose everything, we still have each other.

sevenfourteen's avatar

I spent all weekend thinking about a question like this and right about now it’s about a 3.5 (I haven’t talked to him since Friday and we’re 200+ miles away) but I’ll be home for thanksgiving soon so hopefully that’ll be up around 9 by Saturday night.

wundayatta's avatar

7, which is pretty good considering where it was a couple of years ago.

rangerr's avatar

Anywhere between -34534 to 10.

mistered's avatar

Her not being pregnant and having a sex drive again. That would make it better.

StephK's avatar

I am very blessed to be with my SO.
We’re probably at a 7.5/8. It would higher except for the long distance, some communication issues, and some past issues that like to rear their heads every once in a while (not cool, I know).

Many, many times we hit 10. Occasionally we hit 4 or 5. Once, about six or seven months ago we hit 0 (as in, no relationship) but that story’s too long to go into, and not important in the sense that it’s been forgiven (still stings to think about, but is forgiven).

Dr_C's avatar


The thing that cold most improve our relationship? having the time to travel more… we have lots of travel plans but no time to put them into action.

poofandmook's avatar

See, right now it’s about a 6 or a 7 because we’re apart, and we haven’t spoken in days, but he’s been texting me tons saying how much he misses me.

evegrimm's avatar

@Courtybean, sounds like you can use all the hugs you can get. (((((hugs)))))

Here is the best dictionary to hit your SO with: image. It’s a bit big, and there’s a chicken involved, but I guarantee he’ll be out for a while. :D

mowens's avatar


YARNLADY's avatar

We’ve been married 35 years now, and he’s still way over the top to me.

StephK's avatar

@evegrimm and @Courtybean… I actually have that dictionary propping up my laptop, so if you want to borrow it…

rockstargrrrlie's avatar

I wish we had more time during the week to spend together, since right now he works full time and goes to class 3 days a week, so I don’t get to see him as much as I’d like.

ItalianPrincess1217's avatar

Overall I’d give it an 8. But every area is different. Examples:
Communication: 10
Trust: 9
Sex: 7
Finances: 8

JLeslie's avatar

@ItalianPrincess1217 I love your answer! It is so tue that it matters which category you are talking about.

noraasnave's avatar

@JLeslie what about you. I don’t see your number?

chelseababyy's avatar

@noraasnave There is. And that will happen in the future! I’m not saying I’m not happy. There’s just some things I’m looking forward to.. eventually.

tb1570's avatar

A 4. Thanks for getting me thinking. My honest response was a real eye-opener to myself and really got me thinking about the state of my current relationship and how unhappy I generally am…

noraasnave's avatar

It is generally an eye opener to take a step back and evaluate where your relationship rates on a simple scale. I know I sat up in the middle of the night when I realized that my, now, ex-wife being out of my life (separated) would take me from a 2 on the scale to a 10 again.

I was so excited at her exiting the life of myself and my children that I woke up completely and had to get up and do something to celebrate. I was so focused on another divorce that I didn’t realize the simple truth.

Thanks everyone for the honest respectful answers. I hope this helps you as it did me on that night. It turned my sadness to intense happiness and relief.

JLeslie's avatar

@noraasnave very observant, I was not sure if I would answer. I would say 90% of the time a 9, but there are moments that it is as low as a 5. I have never had a 5 moment last more than 2 hours.

madsmom1030's avatar

I am blessed to be married to my soulmate so I would rate my relationship at a 10. I took a moment to think about this because right now we are thousands of miles apart until may-june of next year. He isn’t just my husband he is also my soulmate, best-friend, co-parent, and so much more. We are devoted to supporting each other, pursuing each and learning about each other. Even with the distance we are able to communicate our love for each other and to feel close to one another through talking on the phone, email, writing letters and care packages. I love being able to fully embrace the person that I am and have his support 100% of the time. we are using our seperation to grow as individuals and to grow as a couple. Prior to this I never knew that it was possible to be with someone that compliments and completes me- it was like finding a part of myself that I never knew was missing. Even though it is months away I am so excited for his homecoming!

noraasnave's avatar sounds like you found the exact match for yourself. It sounds like the relationship we all hope to find…if we only had the determination and patience! How did you find this soul mate? How long did you have to look? I wonder if your other half feels the same…

btw…did I tell you how beautiful and wonderful you are today, my love, my soulmate?

noraasnave's avatar

oops…and yes, our relationship definitely is a 10! ;)

Dog's avatar

10 for sure. No doubt. I am the luckiest dog in the world!

Dog (25142points)“Great Answer” (2points)
Courtybean's avatar

@evegrimm & @StephK…. I think I just about died with laughter then!!

Courtybean's avatar

Oh @evegrimm & @StephK – I forgot to mention lurve for you both for your responses!

Silhouette's avatar

Usually he is a solid ten, but the last few days he has been on my last nerve. It’s nothing he is doing, it’s all me, so I guess that means he is a ten and I am a five maybe six. I’m irritated by the weather, noise pretty much anything right now.

phil196662's avatar

My wife and I are pretty much a 10, been there from the start. Had communication, openness, adventure and trust. Then she showed me she want me to -show her the ropes_…

CrammaDoodle's avatar

Freakin’ 11. hahaha. :3 I’ve never been happier in my life.
Nothing needs to change.

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